{Post in collaboration with Slim & Save, I received gifted products.
This post may also contain affiliate links - as an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases, any affiliate links will be marked with #ad}
My Journey so Far
Regular readers will know I have been very overweight for a long, long time. It really is the bane of my life but much of the time I seem powerless to do anything about it. I know that sounds a bit pathetic but we all have our demons to conquer and overeating is mine.
I went on my first diet when I was about 14 (if my memory serves me well). It was my doctor who put me on it and thinking back, I'm sure I was only about a size 10/12, so it seems outrageous to me now, that he thought it was OK to confirm my worries about my size and ask me to keep a food diary and then just half everything I ate.
Over the years I have tried many, many diets. I tend to go for the more mainstream and less extreme diets in general. I know the general principle of eat less and move more, but truly I do love food and as much as anything, I know I am an emotional eater and I love the comfort of food, and that's not healthy for me.
I'm now at the heaviest I have ever been, I am classed as morbidly obese and I can feel myself falling apart. I have around six different health/ pain issues that I am convinced would all benefit from me being between 2 - 8 stone lighter. So, no longer can I ignore my issues, I have to take steps to make a difference.
As I age, I am realising more and more that I should have been looking after my skin better when I was younger. My skin is often tight, dry and itchy now, especially on my lower legs, upper arms and chest area. Of course, at the moment it is Autumn and we're at the best time of year for my skin as it isn't too warm and it isn't too cold, but already as the colder weather arrives, I am being reminded of the need to moisturise regularly.
Luckily Balneum got in touch a couple of months back and asked me to try out their dry skin and itch relief lotion, which I was happy to agree to. I was then over the moon when it wasn't just the lotion that arrived, but their cream, oleo wash and shampoo too. I have been using all the products for the last few weeks to give them a thorough trial, to see how they work on ageing skin and I also got my 16-year-old son to try them too as he has pretty bad psoriasis, and we are keen to minimise his need for steroid creams as much as we can.
Who are Balneum?
Balneum have created a specially formulated emollient and daily cleansing range for people with dry skin and for when itch relief is required. When used together the products become a complete emollient therapy for the skin and scalp that are dry, flaky, agitated or suffering with eczema or psoriasis. So, me with my dry skin and itchy and flaky scalp, and JJ with his all-over psoriasis are good candidates for putting these products through their paces.
Their slogan is Itch less, live more and that's great, as we're in an age now were no-one should have to be that uncomfortable with their skin that it starts to negatively impact on their life and activity choices.
{This post contains samples given to me for review and also affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases, any affiliate links will be marked with #ad}
Teen girls can be tricky to buy for; I have two of them and they really are chalk and cheese, so it is clear to me that no one solution suits all of them. The thing that they do have in common is that they are like magpies and are attracted to pretty, shiny things in beautiful wrapping.
My girls still badger me to do them a stocking each and apparently it is the best part of the Christmas presents but I am finding it gets more and more expensive as they get older, so you have to become creative and make sure your stocking is a realistic size!
e.l.f Make-up sets - From £6
My girls are going to be thrilled to receive these elf cosmetics (#ad) sets. The prices are so reasonable with the pack of three lip balms and 3 eyeshadow duos both selling for just £6 each at Boots, and the Haute chocolate eyes shadow set is £12. Extra good is that they are all included in the Boots 3 for 2 gifting deal. The colours look really pigmented and totally on-trend.
Personalised Notebook from Norma and Dorothy - £22
This is a really stunning notebook (#ad) that Miss E will love using as her artist's sketchpad as the pages are blank. It has a nice hardcover and is spiral-bound, so it is easy to use and firm to lean on. The personalisation is in real gold foil and makes the book unique and special. There are loads of gorgeous personalised gifts on Norma & Dorothy and they all come beautifully packaged.
Once you become a parent your whole perspective changes, or certainly mine did. Every new thing looks as if it holds danger and you worry constantly for your children. But worry isn't productive, so it is important to actually take some firm steps to ensure that your children are well looked after, safe, happy and financially secure if the worst should happen to you and your partner.
Here are a few ideas to get you started -
1. Make sure you have a Will in place
2018 research from Which showed that 54% of adults in the UK do not have a will, this is an astounding figure. I daren't imagine what would happen if my husband and I both died and our estate had to be sorted out and there was no will. I want the kids and their guardians to easily have money available to them to start sorting out their plans and living arrangements for the future.
We chose to make mirror wills as our wishes were the same and it feels a cost-effective way of doing things. Other couples prefer to make separate wills and allow provision for the things they care most about. For us, it was the kids we cared most about and thus mirror wills worked perfectly. For the sake of drawing up a document that took us under an hour and cost less than £150, it would be crazy to die intestate and leave our children and their guardians with those kinds of problems.
Also, importantly, don't forget to tell your next of kin and executor where your will is kept!
Hello friends, how are you today? I am feeling chipper as it is the first Saturday in forever that it hasn't rained! yay
It's been a really good week and I need to celebrate that with a Reasons to be Cheerful post. It's just going to be short and sweet, but sometimes they are the best ones -
I finished work, but I may still work for them....
You may have read that I wasn't loving the job I started 5.5 months ago. It's weird as I'd been yearning to get back into the work place for over five years and I absolutely love the company I had gone to work for. I even really liked the people I worked with, but due to the yearly cycle of the work it meant there would be a number of quieter months every year and that just isn't for me. I've been described as a machine before! I love to churn work out and get that sense of satisfaction. Also the journey turned out to pretty awful some days, taking 90 minutes.
However it looks as if I'll be doing some freelance work still as they don't want to recruit to my job now. So I can work from home! yay
Realising how others see you
In the week I was leaving there was a couple of telling conversations that were really lovely to hear and ponder on. First a couple of colleagues were having a chat about 'get up and go' as in it means just that - to leave, but also it describes someone with energy, enthusiasm and initiative. Then one of my colleagues, said it was like me.
Also, the day I left they gave me some truly beautiful flowers and another colleague that they were bright and vibrant, like me.
I can hardly believe I have a 16-year-old son;
time really does pass very quickly. We’ve just done the rounds of the local
colleges for him to choose where he wants to go on to next and I realise we are
very lucky as he made a decision quickly and feels sure of the courses he wants
to do.
JJ has always been academic and the STEM
subjects come easily to him, so it was no surprise when he put his application
in for Maths, Further Maths, Computer Science and Law. We’re not sure if he’ll
be taking three or four A levels as yet, this will be decided at his college interview in December.
I was keen for him to do four. I think it was
just so I could be a proud mum, with a really bright son. However, when we did
some investigating, it turns out that all the uni’s only look for results in
three subjects, and they’d far rather the applicant had three seriously good
results than four OK ones. We then noticed that where Further Maths is taken
the college normally advocate a fourth subject, so we’ll just see what the college
says and take their advice, they have done this many more times than us.
{This post contains samples given to me for review and also affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchase, any affiliate links will be marked with #ad}
It won't be long now friends! We have to get on board and admit that Christmas is fast approaching, I won't tell you that I am completely organised as yet but I am well on the way and the piles of presents hidden around my house are adding up!
As my children get older I find it is harder and harder to buy physical presents for them, often they want experiences, money, clothes or tech and that's OK, they are growing up so I have to respect their wishes. However, I miss the days when they were little and we would be able to enjoy their presents together, building LEGO, playing a board game or doing some craft.
Then a couple of weeks ago it occurred to me, why do things have to change? Last year I bought Risk and we all enjoyed paying it together, so this year doesn't need to be any different, I am going to invest in some gifts we can all enjoy together and then I get my favourite Christmas gift - all my family together.
Here are a few ideas for gifts all the family can enjoy together (if you have older kids like me) -
For the Home
ASDA personalised photo cushion - £26
My first idea was to make a generic one to go on the sofa, but then I knew that my Miss E would really love one with all her favourite cuddlies on it, so here it is with her Alfie teddy, my parents dog Archie and our cat Puss Puss. This will stay in the lounge and we can all enjoy it as it is big enough for two to share. I went for the XL cushion, which is 25" x 14.5" and retails at £26.00 with £4 postage (there is also a smaller size available too).
The cushion is really good quality, it is soft suede, plain beige on the back and printed on the front. There are loads of templates you can choose from for printing, to make it totally unique to your home and I found the process simple, and the delivery quick. I'll happily use ASDA photo again for personalised gifts and I see there is 10% of all personalised cushions until the end of this year too, which is a great deal!
For me, Christmas just doesn’t feel like Christmas unless our home is decorated in the right way. Tinsel, mistletoe, baubles and fairy lights: all add to the ambience that makes the season. The centrepiece for all of these decorations, naturally, is formed by the tree. But decorating a tree isn’t just a destination; it’s a journey, too. If you want to get the whole family into the Christmas spirit, then drafting them all in to lend a hand is a great way to get started!
For many years when the kids were small, we used to have two trees, as I loved to have a 'perfect' colour coordinated one in the lounge that I had decorated and then we would have a second one in the dining or playroom. This one was super colourful, sling everything on, including homemade decorations tree. As the kids have aged though, I have realised that for me, it is far more important to have everyone involved with the ritual of decorating the tree than it is, for it to look perfect.
Let’s look at a few ways in which we can make the tree-decorating experience special for everyone -
Wearing Christmas Clothes
Any activity will feel that little bit more Christmassy if you’re wearing the right clothes. If you’re gifting Christmas jumpers, then you can save opening them until the big day itself. But there’s nothing stopping you from wearing last year’s jumpers. On the other hand, you might make the experience a little bit cosier by wearing your winter sleepwear. Matching pyjamas or onesies will make the whole family feel like the same cohesive unit!
As a woman in my twenties, it never occurred to
me to analyse my life. To really look at aspects of it and see if I was happy
with them, or if they were healthy. For me, becoming a Christian at 29 was what
had set me on an introspective journey to find out who I am and what is right
for me. I would say what makes me happy, but that doesn’t sit right with me,
for I believe my life isn’t lived for my own gratification.
I have a purpose, a greater good that I’m
supposed to achieve during my life. It may not be what the world deems as bold,
exciting or successful. I don’t have to become famous, make a million, or be
stunningly beautiful. Society’s expectations of success don’t really apply, and
it is so good to remind myself of that fact. All that is expected of me, is
that I try my hardest to follow Christ’s example, to be a good citizen, and to
think about other people, as well as myself.
In fact, in the last few days I’ve been
realising, yet again, (why do I forget these important messages and then have
to learn them again?) that I need to prefer others to myself. That’s not about
me having low self-esteem and believing other people are more important than
me. Not at all. It is about me remembering that I’m here to serve, in so many
ways.
I’ve truly found that when I take my focus off
myself and put it onto others, I am a lot more fulfilled. When I keep analysing
why I feel lonely, or why I’m so fat, or why my work doesn’t feel fulfilling,
all I do is perpetuate those feelings. You know what they say, negative in,
negative out!
It’s so important to think positive and to seek
the good in people. Some may say I’m wearing rose tinted glasses, but that’s
not true, as I still know the world is flawed and there are problems in both my
life, and the wider world around me. I just need to make the purposeful choice
(and no, it’s not always easy) to see the best. A lovely friend reminded me of
this the other day, as my thinking the worst of a situation that involved her
had resulted in me feeling hurt for the last year and because I hadn’t raised
the subject with her, she had no idea, she just thought I was busy, rather than
purposely staying away.
Communication really is key to everything in
life. Being honest and open with God, those around you and importantly,
yourself, makes a massive difference. It won’t always be easy, in fact
sometimes it will feel like such hard work, but it will always pay off.
After my post the other day about loneliness and seeking a good local friend, I spent some more time in prayer and
contemplation, trying to decide what would make the difference to me right now.
What did I come up with? I realised I need to stop thinking about myself and to
do more for others. Not silly things like the kids washing or dropping them
places, but more purposeful things like spending time with them doing an activity they
enjoy, leaving the best parking space for someone else, or
volunteering to do the crappy job at work, the one no-one enjoys.
I have far less time now than I used to, as I’m
working more, but there is always time to do the little things, and many little
things add up to be a big thing. The thing that takes me out of myself and
helps me to focus on others and hopefully gives me that sense of purpose and
satisfaction that I’m ultimately seeking.
But what about you, what are you seeking?
I'm linking this post up with Becky at Lakes Single Mum for Reasons to be Cheerful.
Have you ever thought about starting your very own blog? It’s
hard work…but incredibly rewarding. You might not want your blog to be found
and read by others, you might prefer it to be a private online diary, or maybe
you have an opinion that you’re desperate to share, or you have some advice
that you know others will find helpful. No matter what your motivation for
starting a blog is, it’s a wonderful creative outlet that is ideal for personal
growth and for building your confidence!
Starting a blog is a great idea, but have you wondered what
you might need to make it a success?
Check out my 4 top tips for blogging
success below.
You need the right tools
Of course you’re going to need a laptop and access to the
internet but having a good set of writing tools at your disposal will also help
you through the blogging process. For example, if you’re referencing someone
else’s work or maybe a newspaper article then help with citations and
referencing will be a huge help. Scribbr provides
apa citation guidelines and advice on their website. Investing in proofreading
software, as well as a programme that will help you with spelling, grammar and
clarity will also prove useful. It will also help you improve your work.
Find your niche
You don’t always have to have a niche to make your blog
enjoyable, however, having one will help you to gather a bit of a following and
build on your blog subscribers. If you offer information on a range of
different topics then some readers might dip in and out of your work rather
than returning week after week for a new insight on one specific topic that
interests them. If you have a unique perspective of a particular topic or
varying degrees of experiences and advice from it all, then, by all means, go for
it! Parenting, minimal lifestyles, health and fitness, eco-living, veganism,
sport, travel – all are popular niches. Try to find yours!
Owning pets, whether it's adorable puppies or kittens, fills your home with so much joy. Unfortunately, it also can
fill your house with lots of fur and dander. One aspect of pet ownership,
which many owners don't consider, is the effect their pets have on their
home's HVAC (Heating, ventilation and air conditioning) system. If you are
a pet owner, here's what you should be doing to take care of your HVAC
system and keep it operating at its best.
Groom Regularly
Keeping your dog or cat groomed isn't just a great way to keep them clean
and looking their best. A well-groomed animal causes less mess around the home. Regular brushing is highly effective at keeping your house from being
overrun by fur. It removes the fur into the brush, where it can be easily
disposed of. This way, it doesn't get in your heating and cooling ducts
and clog up the system.
Vacuum and Sweep
No matter how diligent you are with grooming it's likely that your pets
will still shed in your house. By maintaining a consistent vacuuming or
sweeping plan you remove the loose fur before it has a chance to get
sucked into a vent where it clogs up your HVAC system.
If you’re looking to book a winter sun holiday with your
family - or looking into options for the
Easter break, or even next year’s summer holiday -
then you might have thought about going to Greece. The gorgeous weather and
fantastic food are just two reasons that may persuade you to pick this country,
but it has so much more to offer.
Kefalonia is one of the many great places to go. It’s the
largest of the Ionian Islands in the west of
Greece, and offers couples and families many things to do together. Here are some
suggestions you may want to think about when booking your Grecian escape -
What to see
If you’re looking for a beach holiday in Greece, then you’ve
come to the right place. Not only are there many white sandy spots to sit on,
but the beautiful blue sea is a gorgeous, inviting enigma with plenty of
surprises within. Myrtos, on the north-west coast of the Kefalonia,
is considered to be one of the top 30 beaches in the world.
You don’t have to just sit on the beach, though, because
there are many things you can do in the sea, or
explore on the coast. If you or your children are interested in animals, then
you could go to Argostoli Bay to see the wild loggerhead turtles lay their eggs, or
even take a cruise on a glass-bottomed boat. There are many caves, lakes and
other water-based activities you can discover as well.
I am so thankful that we got to have a few days away last week during half-term. We've been lucky this year with a couple of short breaks to Yorkshire and then Kent, where we stayed in AirBnB's and they were both lovely, but what I have realised is that when we holiday in the UK we don't rest properly. We do things, we go places, I tidy the house etc etc
Last week we headed to Spain for just 4 nights and I wondered what it would be like. Would it feel as if we've only just arrived and then had to leave again? But no, it was excellent and we all felt thoroughly relaxed by the end of it.
We stayed at the airport the night before and had an early flight, so we were by the pool of our hotel by 10.30am and this gave us an extra full day. The hotel was fab and the rooms were ready by 1pm, so we could get unpacked and back down by the pool in no time at all!
I'd definitely recommend Salou for an October half term break as the temperature was between 21 and 25 degrees each day, and yes I picked up a bit of a tan and needed sun cream! The only downside is that the swimming pools in the hotels are not heated and as such are cold, no scrap that, they are truly freezing!
By the last day both my girls got brave and spent a few hours in the pool, it was lovely to see them having fun with some lovely girls they met.
It was a very low-key holiday, with a bus trip into the neighbouring resort, lots of long walks, coffees out, finding the local cats, games of cards, time spent chatting, reading and enjoying a cheeky Baileys each night.
It was also Salou Independence day whilst we were there and my hubby went to see the night parade with pyrotechnics and the girls and I joined him the next day to see the day parade, with bands, massive puppets, a giant eel and a very scary canon!
I'm thinking this October half-term holiday could become a thing! It was so much cheaper than other times of the year, but next time I would have to find a heated pool!
Having high or low humidity levels in your home can cause
significant trouble. Not only is living in a home with extreme humidity levels
uncomfortable, but excessive moisture or dryness can also cause damage to your
property. Here's what you need to know about regulating your home's humidity
levels to keep them in a comfortable range.
Know Your Warning Signs You can't adjust humidity levels in your home if you don't
know if your humidity levels are off in the first place. The good news is you
don't need any special tools to check for overly humid or dry air. You just
need to know what to look for.
If static electricity levels are high or the paint on your
walls is cracking, your home is likely too dry. If you're seeing condensation
regularly on your windows or drinking glasses, or you're smelling musty odours,
you likely have high humidity.
Handle Wet Clothing Well One of the easiest ways to adjust humidity levels in a
low-tech way is to adjust your treatment of wet clothes. Leaving wet or damp
towels and clothing out causes natural moisture to enter the air. If your
humidity is high and you've been leaving wet clothes in your hamper, simply
doing laundry and putting them away clean and dry could solve a high humidity
issue.
Perhaps you have the opposite problem: low humidity, or dry
air. If that's the issue, after you take your clothes out of the washer, skip
the dryer. You'll find you can raise your home's humidity using clean laundry. Lay laundry out on a line or
rack to encourage evaporation of moisture into the air.
I’ve been looking after myself
recently and that why there’s not been many blog posts, or not ones that take
emotional energy anyway. I haven’t felt like I’ve had much to say and now the
kids are 12, 12 and 16 it’s so hard to share my parenting tales, as they (quite
rightly) don't want their lives broadcast for all to read. Peer pressure and
casual bullying are too rife sadly!
I made a choice a long time ago that I’d share the good,
bad and ugly of my life as a way of connecting, helping others and showing that
Christians are regular, flawed people too. Even this, now, has become more
difficult as so much of my life involves my husband and I’ve never shared on
his behalf. He’s a very private man and wouldn’t want his life ‘out’ there.
So blogging really does seem to be changing for me, it’s
becoming less personal and more a way I earn money. Now, I’m trying to decide
if I’m OK with that. Of course the money in the bank is very helpful, and not
too difficult to earn, but do I want Mummy from the Heart to be a commercial
entity?
I think, to be honest, it is the reality of where I am
right now. I’ll still do personal posts when the moment takes me and I have
something to say but I’m not going to beat myself up for earning a living and
being able to pay for a holiday for our family.
As I sat in the day spa yesterday I was feeling proud of
myself. Proud that I seem to have found that elusive balance that everyone
seeks - I’m employed, I’m self-employed, I’m mum, I’m wife and I’m Michelle
too. I’m getting time for things I enjoy and I’m not feeling run ragged.
Some of it is down to the kids being older, but much of
it is down to my head being in the right place and being able to accept who
people are and what their limitations are. As well as being able to reconcile
that I cannot do everything. I just have to choose what is most important and
focus on those things.
This update post will serve as my regular reasons to be
cheerful post, where I share what is making me feel happy and grateful right
now.
·Time at the spa alone, I had a massage, facial,
time on the hot stone relaxation beds, swim, steam and Jacuzzi. Pure bliss!
·I’m loving being part of the village panto. I
have just volunteered for the chorus this year and I’ve even backed out of one
dance as my hurting foot won’t tolerate the moves, but I am loving the singing.
·I’ve been spending time in the prayer centre to
just be and wait on God, which is never time wasted.
·We’ve joined a new church and I wake up each
Sunday wanting to go and I come away inspired and wanting to do better. I haven’t
had that for a while now, so it is so welcome.
·I made a choice this week to walk away from a
work situation that was upsetting me and I have cut all ties with the source of
anxiety.
·I’m not entirely satisfied with the job I
started back in June, but it was good last week to be really honest with my
manager and to make her aware that I wasn’t sure if it was the right job for
me. We’re working together to see where
it goes.
·I’ve been doing some boring but necessary jobs,
like sorting out the thousands of photos I take. Many are of Ashburnham Place
where I live and I use them for their social and promotional work. They are now
all sorted into files of image type.
·This week has been busy, every moment has been
planned for, but even in that I am managing to swim twice this week and I’m not
beating myself up for lack of gym visits. They’ll get back on track once I
return from holiday.
·And there is the last reason, we go off on
holiday Saturday for a few days to Spain. I’m hoping for lots of relaxation,
walks, swims, good food and book reading. JJ isn’t coming with us, he has the
grandparents coming to stay and is looking after the cat, but he’ll enjoy that
just as much. It will be strange without my boy though.
Now, over to you. How are you doing? I’d love to know,
Mich xx
I think you're either a cut flower person or you're not. I'm not massively nowadays, I can totally appreciate their beauty and I love to take photographs of flowers growing, especially when visiting National Trust properties but it is rare for me to have cut flowers in the house.
If I do, it will normally mean spring has arrived and I picked up some cheerful daffs cheap at the supermarket, someone has sent me a thank you bouquet that I have spread between a few vases across the house, or that it is my anniversary and my hubby remembers how much I love our wedding flowers, stargazer lilies.
Choosing Flowers as a Gift
I do enjoy sending flowers though, as so many of my friends and family really appreciate flowers. I think as you get older and have everything you need, flowers can be a lovely decadent gift that you may not give yourself and are therefore appreciated at special times.
Some of the fun for me in sending flowers is trying to match up the perfect ones for the recipient, and not being too distracted by what I like or don't like. For example, my Nan loved big chrysanthemums as they are bold and bright and reminded her of my Grandad as he grew them, but I detest the smell. Even so, they would still always be my go-to flower for her as it is about making her happy.
Is there such a thing as the language of love? I suspect many people would assume it is all about perfect chemistry and romance - roses, the colour red, candle-lit dinners and hot bubble baths run for you by your beloved, but I believe it is different for every person.
A few years back I read the Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman and in more recent years, I've read some of his spin-off books as well and they're excellent. I definitely buy into his thinking that there are five different ways of receiving and giving love. This applies to any kind of love too, romantic, friendly, parental, platonic.
Even the best of matchmakers probably couldn't tell at first glance if you're love language compatible with your partner, but dig a bit further and the good news is that we can all give and receive in all the love languages.
Chapman suggestions that the five love languages are -
Physical Touch - this is probably the easiest to understand. It is about all expressions of physical touch, both sexual and non-sexual. So an encouraging shoulder squeeze could be enough to motivate a teenage lad who has this as his primary love language.
Acts of service - this is my number one. I really feel loved when people do things for me, especially when it is unexpected and I haven't had to ask them. So my husband stacking and emptying the dishwasher so I come down to a tidy kitchen in the morning is a big turn-on for me.
Heading out on my own for a walk and pray around the grounds of my home
Earlier this week I was booked in for a spa day at our local Bannatynes. You can get really good deals on Wowcher and I decided at the beginning of this year that at least a couple of times a year I would treat myself to a day spa. A few treatments, time in the gym, steam room, swim, massive jacuzzi and a nice lunch with a good book. Oh and not forgetting some downtime on the hot stone relaxation beds.
I'd been really looking forward to my day spa and I hadn't let any appointments or tasks get in the way. As I was getting ready in the morning Miss E asked me who I was going with. I told her I was going alone and she looked so concerned and said 'but won't you get lonely mum?' This got me pondering and thinking about my friendships and yes there are definitely times when I get lonely, but to be honest, at the day spa isn't one of them.
Call me selfish but I love to be able to suit myself. I did the activities in the order I wanted, I ate when I was hungry, if I was later than planned in the morning it didn't matter and when I had lunch I could absorb myself in my book. I had moments of longing as I saw so many friends and couples, there for the day together, looking comfortable in each others company and chatting away, but ultimately I decided I really was OK there on my own.
Since we moved to East Sussex over six years ago I haven't had the easiest time making friends. There are lots of people I know and would happily chat to, there are even a couple I've had really deep conversations with and enjoyed special times with but I haven't made that best friend. The one who knows me so well and we just hang out and do life together. I do get sad about that sometimes.
We all know teenagers have their
moments, they can be a delight one minute and difficult to talk to the next.
Being aware of your own style of communication is key, if you’re too forceful
then you may be ignored or pushed back, and if you are too soft then you might
not give them the motivation they need.
When broaching the subject of college
or university however, there are a few things that you can do to keep the lines
of communication open, and the parental relationship on sound terrain!
1. Start the Conversation Early
Of course you want to help yourteen consider which college or university might
be right for them, and it is best to start this conversation earlier than you might
think. The sooner you start the conversation, the less time pressure there is
and the easier it is for them to adjust to the idea of potentially leaving home
and becoming more independent.
You can ask around your friends for
good experiences their older children have had, and collect some prospectuses
for them. if your child has one of those rosielovescake@hotmail.co.uk kind of
email address then it is probably a good idea, to help them to set up a new
more professional email address. Then encourage them to independently email
colleges for the information they require.
I've been reflecting this weekend on how lucky we are to every new day in front of us. Each is a privilege that we need to make the most of. That doesn't mean we have to be super busy or doing loads, it just means we should be fulfilling our calling, whatever it is we believe we are on this earth to do.
I have to be honest I am still not clear on what my ultimate calling is, I know this season right now is about parenting my three children, supporting my husband and serving the community I live within. I also still wonder if there is something bigger than this that I should be doing, but that could just be me and my pride, assuming there was due to be more to my life than being a helper.
Sadly, I'm very task-driven, I love to tick things off the to-do list and I get such a sense of satisfaction when things are running smoothly and everything is on track. I know that I am far more concerned with things and tasks than I am with people and relationships. I also know that people are far more important, so my priorities are out of balance, but all I can do is try to change things, to shift the balance a little.
God made me with the skills and talents I have, so I am obviously supposed to be an organised, efficient kind of woman who gets things done, but it is my job to maintain balance and to focus on His desires for all His children. That they are loving and full of grace for all people.
I've had a fabulous weekend and I am very thankful for it. There hasn't been anything big and glamorous going on, but it has been great.
Saturday
I started the day with a cooked breakfast and a couple of episodes of Chicago Med
I had a great hour in the Prayer Centre soaking and reading
Lunch with some lovely ladies and a very good chat
I got a couple of (long-overdue) cupboards sorted out
A few hours of work and many things ticked off
Yummy homemade chilli nachos for tea with all the family
Casualty on TV
Sunday
A great service at church, with a pertinent message about belonging
Roast beef cooked for me
I got the weeks ironing out of the way
Fun rehearsal for the panto I am taking part in, in November
Off to see Jo Brand at the theatre in a few minutes and then a chicken kebab on the way home
Simple stuff, but it all makes for a happy and content Mich!
I hope you've had a great weekend too. Mich x
I'm linking this post up with Becky at Lakes Single Mum for Reasons to be Cheerful
