Showing posts with label top tips. Show all posts
Showing posts with label top tips. Show all posts

Wednesday, 3 January 2024

Essential Summer Holiday Preparation - 25 Ways to Ensure You are Ready

pool in Spain

We've booked our summer holiday already. The kids are really excited and I'm on countdown but we are feeling very well prepared so I thought I'd share with you the things I do to ensure I am fully ready for my family's summer holiday.

Once you've booked the holiday itself it would be easy to just sit back and think that you're sorted but there any many more things you can be doing in advance that will help you save money and ensure that your vacation goes really well.


At Least 3 Months in Advance

1.  Check your Passport and if you need a Visa
Depending on where you are travelling to will dictate whether you need a visa or not. This Gov.uk site is the best place to start. Also make sure you check your expiry date on your passport as travel to some countries will require you to have at least 6 months left on your passport once you re-enter the UK.

2.  Do you need any Vaccinations?
Country-specific information and advice is published by the National Travel Health Network and Centre on the TravelHealthPro website, so make sure you check their about health and vaccination information relevant to the country you are visiting.

Thursday, 7 April 2022

The Ultimate Guide for Families Travelling on a Budget: Top 9 Tips

Photo by Weiqi Xiong on Unsplash

{This is a collaborative post}

 

If you're like most families, you're always looking for ways to save money. And when it comes to traveling, that can sometimes be a challenge. But don't worry – we've got you covered!

In this blog post, debt help experts Creditfix go over their top money-saving tips for families looking to travel on a budget. From everyday budgeting and savings tips to free advice on the latest solutions, Creditfix are financial experts and help thousands of people beat debt each year.

Check out their top tips below:

1. Plan ahead:

Your vacation is a time to relax and enjoy yourself, but it can also be a major strain on your budget. If you're not careful, the costs of travel, lodging, and activities can add up quickly. The key to any successful vacation, especially one on a budget, is planning ahead. By giving yourself time to research different travel options and compare prices, you'll be more likely to find the best deal for your family. You should also look for ways to cut costs without sacrificing quality. For example, you might want to consider renting a vacation home rather than staying in a hotel. 

Whilst you're away, you'll want to keep in touch with your loved ones, and a cost-efficient way to do that is with Holafly's esim for travelers.

2. Set a budget:

One of the most important aspects of planning a vacation is setting a budget. You need to know how much you're willing to spend on travel and accommodations before you start searching for deals. Keep in mind that vacation prices can vary depending on the time of year and the destination. If you're flexible with your travel dates, you may be able to find a better deal. It's also a good idea to consider the cost of activities when you're budgeting for your vacation. If you're traveling with family, look for vacation packages that include family-friendly activities.

Monday, 13 September 2021

8 Considerations when Planning to Move into a New Home

Eight essential areas to think about before you move into your new home. Planning now will make a difference when you move in.
Photo by Roselyn Tirado on Unsplash

{This is a collaborative post}

Buying a new home is always exciting but it can be a little daunting too, as there are so many factors you need to think about and often new houses come with a to-do list as long as your arm. You probably chose your new home due to its location and/ or size but that doesn't always mean it is all ready for you to move into. 

So here are some pointers for a few areas to think through once you have secured your sale but prior to moving in -

1.  Insurance cover in place 


In England, once you have exchanged contracts the house is your responsibility to have insured, so make sure you have good building cover ready to go. You don't want anything to happen and then not to be covered, that would be the worst, incurring costs without ever having moved in. 

2.  Renovations


Does the layout of the house meet the needs of your family? Would it suit better if it had an open-plan downstairs, or do you need a small extension to convert into the granny flat? If you have the money available it may be easier to do these kinds of renovations before you move in and have all your belongings everywhere. Or maybe it would work to just move into the upstairs of your home whilst the downstairs is worked on. There are lots of possible solutions and it is definitely worth speaking to your architect or builder as they may offer solutions that have never even occurred to you. Remember they've probably seen and done it all before.  

3.  Decorating required?


What redecoration is needed and how quickly do you want to get it done? Plan out a timeline of when you'll be doing the decorating or do you want someone to come in for you? If you want someone else to do it seek quoted in good time as the best tradespeople get booked up well in advance. It might be worth leaving one of two rooms empty or with just boxes/ furniture in the middle covered with dust clothes so you can decorate before they get in the way and you don't have to be moving things unnecessarily. 

Friday, 16 July 2021

8 Ways to Help your Ageing Parents

Photo by James Hose Jr on Unsplash

{This is a collaborative post}


It's a reality for many of us, our parents are getting older and for some their health is starting to deteriorate and maybe you even now feel like the adult in the relationship. Your parents ageing and changing can be a difficult and painful process, especially if something like Alzheimer's or dementia plays a part.

Your parents will have played a large part in your life, helping you through adolescence, assisting you as you leave their home and set up your own home, maybe babysitting your kids and being a\a source of love and wisdom throughout your life. Now, it is time for the tables to turn and for you to be a support to them. However, it is really important to offer this support and care in the right way, as you want them to maintain their dignity and feel in control of their own decisions.

Here are eight ways you can help your ageing parents -

1. Be respectful

This is so important, they're still your parents and they won't want to be treated like children, even if their mental capacity is diminishing you still need to ask permission to undertake any of the tasks you'd like to help them with.

Sunday, 21 February 2021

Top Tips for Buying Perfect Age-Appropriate Presents for Children

Tips for buying age appropriate gifts that children will love.


{This is a paid collaborative post with Wicked Uncle. As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases, any affiliate links will be marked with #ad}

At one point I'd have said I was brilliant at buying children's gifts but not anymore, I've lost touch. My youngest children are now 13 and if I had to buy for a 2-year-old boy I'd be lost! Thank heavens for Wicked Uncle who have amazing gifts for all ages, both boys and girls. I always know I can head over there and pick up something that will be enjoyed and appreciated.

If, like me, you feel like you don't know what the latest gifting trends are for various ages then read on for my tips to help you buy a present that will be loved by its recipient -


Set your budget


First things first, it is far too easy to end up spending a small fortune, so set yourself a budget. If this is your beloved Nephew or Grandson, you're buying for then you might be happy to splash out £80 to £100, but if it is for a birthday party that your child has been invited to then the budget might be considerably smaller.
 

What kind of gift do you want to give?


Is it important to you to give a gift that will educate as well as give joy? Or are you a book buff who always want to pass that love to every child you meet? Each of us likes to give different kinds of presents and that is what makes them personal and special. My brother is brilliant at giving the gifts that I'd never buy for my kids, but the ones they really want. He really is the epitome of the Wicked Uncle!

Whereas I like to be more practical and I love a toy that combines learning and fun. It's great if you can find a gift that will grow with the child, some toys are dual function and can be used in one way for a year or two and then changed as the child develops, or something like LEGO (#ad) or Meccano that can be added to are always a wise investment. 

Saturday, 28 November 2020

Tips for Remaining Confident as a Teenager with Psoriasis

JJ is a 17-year-old boy with chronic psoriasis. Here, he shares his tips for remaining confident as a teenager with psoriasis, & using Epaderm.


I'm really proud of my 17-year-old son, not only because he is super smart and already has his career with GCHQ mapped out in his mind, but because he is living with a long-term chronic skin condition and he does it with such good humour.  You'd be forgiven for looking at that photo above and thinking he is just a pretty normal teenage lad, perhaps a bit geeky or a nerd, but there doesn't look as if there is anything out of the usual, does there?

However, look a bit deeper and you'd see red or scaly white patches covering most his body. Why? Because he has plaque psoriasis

Living with Psoriasis


Until JJ started to develop psoriasis three years ago it wasn't something I knew much about. I had no idea that it is estimated around 2 - 3% of the UK population are suffering with it (according to the UK Psoriasis Association), and it's only in the last year that I've seen just how bad it can get, both on JJ and by joining some online support groups. 

Psoriasis is a particularly difficult skin condition as there is no cure for it, and it presents differently on each person. I'm also learning that what works to helps relieve it at one point may stop working, and there is a massive range of treatments to choose from. It can be quite overwhelming if I am entirely honest.

JJ's psoriasis started off on his back, behind his ears and a patch above his left eye, then over time it has spread and worsened. Whenever I read about psoriasis there is always a description of it flaring up and being worse for a while and then subsiding again. Sadly, this hasn't been the case for JJ, the psoriasis on his body has been progressively getting worse over the last year or so. The plaques on his face do seem to go down with topical steroid creams but we are really trying to limit the use of those.

You can see the from the zoomed-in photos below the reality of how psoriasis can look when you are up close. JJ's daily reality is a scalp that itches and flakes excessively leaving him with 'dandruff' shoulders, red or scaly white patches on his face and his body, constant moisturising to help take away the tightness, itchiness or even pain of his skin, a floor that needs hoovering almost as soon as you've just done it and bedclothes that end up covered in emollient. 

He doesn't have the luxury of most teenage boys, that of choosing if he has a skincare regime, without looking after his skin he'd be uncomfortable all the time.

Saturday, 22 February 2020

Put Your Home in Order – Useful Tips

Photo by Daiga Ellaby on Unsplash


For many of us, cleaning means a lot of unpleasant, time-taking hard work. However, in reality, there are some simple tips that will ease the process of cleaning, and most importantly, change your attitude to the cleaning process.

The primary cause for negative attitudes towards cleaning your house is the wrong internal motivation or even a complete lack of motivation. Often, one person does most of the cleaning work, but the whole family creates a mess. In addition, no matter how much time was spent putting everything in order, by the very next day the mess seems to have recreated as if by itself! It can feel neverending. 

Here I'll share some tips on how to make cleaning your home pleasant, easy and not burdensome.

Cleaning as you go

Urgent cleaning prevents a shallow, easily removable mess from escalating into a serious problem. For example, after cooking dinner, a few greasy spots remain on the stove, they are barely noticeable and do not bother anyone at all, you could easily leave them there. However, if you don't wipe the mess away immediately, and if you leave the dirty stove unattended every day, then a multi-layer burnt crust will form, which will require a large amount of cleaning products and hours of elbow grease, all when you could have spent just two minutes each day keeping your stovetop nice. It really is a false economy to leave it for another day.

Thursday, 23 January 2020

Supporting your Child through their GCSEs

person studying
Photo by Green Chameleon on Unsplash


It’s January and when you have a child in year 11 and getting ready to sit their GCSE examinations in the summer, that means mock exams time at most schools. My son is right in the middle of his, he had three in November and now the rest of them in a three-week block in January. So far, he has sat eight of them and whilst he’d happily go without the mocks, I am really pleased the schools do them.

When I’ve asked secondary school teacher friends what the best way to revise is, they have all said that the best thing your child can do is complete past papers. This doesn’t actually give them new knowledge or even revise what they know already but it allows them to recall their learning, to give exam-style structure in the answers and to gain valuable feedback from the person marking it, as to where they could improve and gain valuable points. An extra point or two on a paper could be the difference between grades, and thus a pass or a fail.

Let me share with you how I am supporting JJ in the run-up to his GCSEs -

1.  Being available - have you noticed that teenagers never want to talk to you when you make yourself available? My JJs favourite times to chat to me are as soon as he walks in from school and I’m working, or around 11.15pm, when he should be sleeping! Yes, it can be annoying, but I’ve learnt it is far more important to stop what I’m doing and give him 15 minutes to download his concerns, thoughts or questions. This is particularly important during the actual exam period, then if your child feels as if an exam went wrong it’s good to be able to talk about it and externalise the associated feelings.

2.  Let them set the agenda - your child is now 15 or 16 years old and as such we have to give them a level of trust. Allow them to choose what they will study and when, of course, we can offer advice, but it is really important that we don’t continually badger them to do things our way. I know that if I asked JJ too much about his revising he would clam up and probably do less as he’d be annoyed at me.  Let’s afford them the level of trust they deserve, and of course, each child is different. 

Saturday, 28 December 2019

Booking Your Airbnb Property - 14 Top Tips

Squirrel court lounge
Squirrel Hill Court, Bradford Airbnb, where we stayed May 2019

Christmas is over and I hope you had a marvellous time. If you're anything like me, your mind will now have moved onto the need to travel and get some holidays/ short breaks booked for 2020, so you can have something to look forward to.

In recent years we've booked a few stays in the UK in Airbnb properties and we've really enjoyed them. With a family of five, it is so good to have the right amount of bedrooms, some outside space and a lounge/ kitchen, rather than all being cooped up in a couple of hotel rooms.

We've been very lucky with the four properties we've booked and they've all turned into truly wonderful holidays with loads of memories made. Our breaks have been in the UK, but I know many friends who have booked abroad and been very happy. In fact I don't personally know anyone who has had an awful experience with Airbnb, but I know they are out there, you only have to google and you'll come across a load on the Internet (but my advise, don't bother!).

I think with some good research before booking, and trusting your gut when you interact with the property owner you can be as sure as possible of a good stay. Here are my top tips for booking your Airbnb property right now -

Tuesday, 16 July 2019

Advice from my 11 year old Twins about Starting Secondary School

Back to school flat lay
Photo by Matt Ragland on Unsplash

This time last year I had two very excited 10 year old's living with me. They couldn't wait (on the one hand) for their school year to finish and to be a step closer to starting at secondary school. But of course, they were also a little sad about losing contact with the friends who were going to go to different schools.

If you've got a child about to start secondary school this coming September you'll probably relate to what I've said and will know this is a time of change, worries and uncertainty, as well as great excitement.

I asked my girls to share their experience and give me some tips on what helped them make this transition and to settle into their new school. So here are tips from my tweens to yours, hand the laptop over now -

Before you Start

*  If your school has an option to attend some summer classes to meet other new pupils and find out how the school works, make sure you take the opportunity to attend as you'll be ahead of many others on your first formal day and will feel much more confident.

*  Make sure you get the right uniform. You might want something different to what they state but it won't be worth the defaults or maybe detentions that you could end up with.

Sunday, 26 August 2018

10 Tips for a Successful Summer Stay in Paris

summer in paris header

Having taken a fabulous trip to Paris with my Mum and brother in early July, I wanted to share with you some of the things I learnt on that visit.

1)   Don’t forget your sun cream and hat, it is boiling in the city, a few degrees hotter than the U.K. and if you are on an open top bus or boat then you will catch the sun and quite possibly burn.

2)   It is really expensive (as are most European cities) nowadays due to the very strong Euro but just go with it. If you try and scrimp and save you’ll find it really difficult to have a coffee or a beer when you’re in a popular area. There are loads of one euro water sellers on the street and you can pick a fresh crepe up for as little as 3 euros from a street stall but we struggled to pay less than about 12 euros for a salad or croque monsieur.

Family at Paris cafe

3)   If you are taking the Eurostar and arrive into the Gard du Nord station, either get off the train as fast as you can to join the taxi queue or have pre-booked one. The queue took us 45 minutes at 8pm on a Thursday night and that was after a delay. We then got charged 23 euros for a fare that should have been far less. On the way back I booked an Uber via the app and paid just 13 euros and had a much quicker and more pleasant journey.

Sunday, 24 June 2018

Planning our Perfect Paris Getaway

Eiffel Tower
Eiffel Tower by MarinaDa, thanks to Shutterstock

In July my Mum hits a big milestone age, I won't reveal as that's not my story to tell but we thought it was worth marking with something a bit special. My Dad isn't much of a traveller so he didn't fancy going abroad but Mum really likes to get away and has hardly travelled at all in her life. So lucky for me Dad offered to fund a trip for my brother and I to take our Mum away.

I knew straight away we'd go for a city break as we'll only be there three nights and I thought taking the Eurostar might be fun as neither my brother nor Mum have before and even for me it has been almost twenty years since the last time.

Arranging our Travel
I managed to get a good price on the Eurostar with the three of us travelling at decent times both ways for just £234. That's £78 each and I couldn't find a flight with better prices for daytime travel, I think the key is to book early. You seem to be able to book about six months before your date of travel and there are lots of £29 one-way deals at the moment.

Wednesday, 13 June 2018

Understanding Sun Protection Products - What Does it all Mean?

beach bundle
Summer Beach Set Image by Africa Photo, thanks to Shutterstock

After spending a week away in the South of France where we had mixed weather but still some horrid sunburn I’ve been prompted to write a post about sun protection products available here in the U.K. It’s a bit of a minefield really, you choose a well-known brand name like Ambre Solaire or Nivea and you assume that all is good and you have chosen well for your family but it might not be the case! Read on for a low down on what all the different terms on your packaging mean and how to make an informed choice this summer. Skin care is important for all ages.

UV Rays
There is so much information out there about the ultraviolet rays that come from the sun and it can get a bit confusing but I’ll just share the basics in layman’s terms. UV radiation from the sun comes in three wavelengths - UVA, UVB and UVC. UVC does not penetrate our ozone and thus we’re only concerned with the other two.

UVA (Ultraviolet A - long-wave)
Most of us are exposed to large amounts of UVA rays in our lifetimes and it has long been established as a cause of premature ageing and wrinkling but was less associated with damage to the epidermis (the outer layers of the skin) which is commonly associated with skin cancer.  However this is changing as newer research shows that UVA damages skin cells in the base layer of the epidermis as well as penetrating deeply.

UVA is the dominant tanning ray and whilst many of us love that brown glow our skin develops in the summer it is actually in response to our skins DNA being damaged and these imperfections can lead to skin cancer. UVA rays are present during daylight hours and they penetrate clouds and even glass.

UVB (Ultraviolet B - shortwave)
Are the rays that cause skin reddening and sunburn. They are just as damaging as UVA rays penetrating the outer layers of the skin and can significantly contribute to skin cancer.

Wednesday, 30 May 2018

How to Get the Best Deal when Renewing your Mobile Phone Contract

young people on a mobile
Teenagers Texting Image by Akhenaton Images from Shutterstock

I've recently just renewed my mobile phone contract and I wanted an upgraded phone but not to have to pay any more per month. I thought this was going to be a very tall order and I'd have to pay quite a lot up-front for a new phone or accept that my monthly bill would be increasing. But no, with some shopping around I was able to secure a new phone that met my specification, the same monthly tariff and only a £50 upfront phone cost. Then considering I was upgrading 40 days before the end of my contract term I even managed to avoid paying off the buy-out charge as I stayed with the same provider and thus the £50 was around the same money. I was suitably impressed!

About a month before the end of your existing contract is a perfect time to look for new deals and to speak to the retention team about leaving your existing network supplier

Let me share with you the stages I went through to get my great value new phone deal -

1.  Choose which Phone you want next
I've been an iPhone user since 2012 and generally I love my phone. I find iOS very easy to use and intuitive and importantly all my music is stored in iTunes and this has kept me tied in over the last 6 years. Personally I've never had the newest iPhone on the market as I can't bear to part with so much money and I've found that by the two year mark each of my iPhones are pretty much done-in and are ready for the scrap heap. At two years my iPhone 4 totally refused to start-up, my 5C camera stopped working and now my SE also has a poor and slow camera!

With this in mind I decided I ought to bite the bullet and give an Android phone a go and I assumed I'd move to Samsung as it is a name I know and trust and my girls had Samsung tablets that worked well but when I started to speak to people everyone kept telling me to try Huawei. The same kind of specs as iPhone and Samsung flagship models but at much lower prices.

Sunday, 10 September 2017

8 Top Tips for Enjoying your Stay at Giraffe Lodge, Port Lympne Reserve

Giraffe Lodge at Port Lympne Reserve, Kent is an amazing and luxurious UK safari experience for any couple, looking for a special time away.

Back in August we visited Port Lympne Reserve for the day with our children. We had a super day out and all the family enjoyed themselves. As we rode the safari truck we passed Giraffe Lodge (formerly know as Livingstone Lodge) and I fell in love. 

I just knew that I had to go and stay in one of the sturdy canvas and wood lodges so that I could get the full animal experience without hardly any other people being there. The thought of waking in the morning with the full view of the Romney Marshes and the first thing I saw being a Giraffe, Rhino or Zebra was massively appealing. 


Giraffe Lodge at Port Lympne Reserve, Kent is an amazing and luxurious UK safari experience for any couple, looking for a special time away.

Well, on the 1st September my husband and I were lucky enough to stay for a night to celebrate his birthday and we had the most wonderful time. I'll share a full review of our experience in another post once I have edited all the video together but for now I thought I'd share eight top tips for an amazing stay at Giraffe Lodge within the Port Lympne Reserve. 

I seriously can not recommend this experience highly enough!

Thursday, 16 February 2017

8 Positive Things to Do When You are Feeling Overwhelmed


Sometimes you don't even know what is bothering you but life just feels as if it is about to overwhelm you. You know how it is, some days you can take on the world and others the slightest thing may push you over the edge. Here I share five positive things you can do to help yourself when it all feels too much.

1.  Acknowledge it
It is so important that you own how you are feeling. Don't be too quick to dismiss the feelings as something silly or insignificant. It might be tempting to berate yourself as your life is good and there is no reason to feel as you do but it won't help you, you'll just get locked into a negative cycle.

2.  Be kind to yourself
Following on from acknowledging, it is important that you are kind to yourself. Remember that age old saying 'if you wouldn't speak to a friend like that then don't speak to yourself in that way'. You are a precious son or daughter of the most high and He would never speak to you in a negative way.

Wednesday, 28 September 2016

18 Tips for Flying with Older Kids


Having recently taken our first flight with our three children (aged 9, 9 and 12) I thought it would be useful for me to share some of the things I learnt on this journey. You don't want to make the mistakes I did and end up with no sleep in an overpriced hotel when I could have secured cheap airport parking and driven after a good nights sleep!

1.  Plan your flight times - OK of course it is cheaper to fly at 1.00 am but can your child cope with that? You want your first day on holiday to be as much fun as all the others, so book wisely.
2.    Book your seats in advance - we made this mistake this year, having not taken a package holiday for over a decade, I assumed very few people would pay the extra to book their seats. I was wrong. Luckily I found this out and was able to book our seats, if I hadn't the five of us would have been in completely different areas and what child wants to fly alone for the first time next to two strangers?
3.    How will you get to the airport? - this year we opted to travel by train and stay in a hotel at the airport. Yes the train fare was really cheap as we booked a long time in advance but we had so much angst due to the strikes and reduced timetables on Southern Railways. Then we also got no sleep at the airport as it was too exciting for the kids and too hot in the room. Next time we will definitely drive our own car so we are in control of our timings and don't have to struggle with big cases.

Sunday, 7 June 2015

10 Good habits to ensure you have a healthy blog


Blog maintenance, I don’t think anyone really enjoys it but it is necessary if you want your blog to retain its authority and be in good standing with the likes of Google, Yahoo and other search engines.
Of course the other plus point is that readers want to keep coming back to a blog that is easy to read and navigate as well.

If you regularly indulge in these ten good habits then you should keep a healthy blog and not fall foul of any penalties that Google decide to dish out!

1.  Check for broken links on your blog regularly.
Basically linking to other web pages in your blog posts is a great idea but you’ll soon find that other blogs close or suppliers change their product links and you are left with a load of links on your blog that are pointing no-where useful and that is a big no-no in terms of your site retaining its credibility. You can easily go to Broken Link Checker and do this for free, I try to do it every couple of months now as I never knew about it for the first five years of blogging and when I went to check there were thousands of links that I needed to remove or fix (one by one) and yes it was a lengthy process.

Friday, 7 March 2014

Five Great Activities for Spring

Thank goodness that Spring has finally arrived; the rain seems to be easing and we are having some beautiful moments of sunshine. It sure does make me feel lighter and improve my mood.

If you are seeking some ideas of what you could get up to in March, here is my top five for Spring -

1)  Head to the beach and watch the sunset. 
Whether you have children or not the beach is always a great place to be. Sure you can't sunbath right now but how about a romantic walk with your partner close to the waves lapping the shore or maybe a game of volleyball with a group of friends?

For my family it is all about the fun of scooting along the prom, beach combing and then having an ice-cream!


2) Get out and smell the roses.
Well perhaps not roses as they are not in bloom yet but what about the azaleas, camellias, blossom trees and daffodils. This time of year is beautiful for both wild and garden flowers alike so take a nice long walk and see what you can spot. Not only is the exercise good for you, you will also enjoy the visual delights of our beautiful world.


3)  Take some time to look after yourself.
We all have different ways to nurture our soul and to take time out. For me it is a night away with my husband, a relaxing swim and a back and neck massage. For you it might be a long hot soak in the bath, a fabulous book or going to the theatre.

Whatever it is, I think we need to create time to look after ourselves and when better than at the start of each new season?

4)  Enjoy some local culture
How many times have you been past a local tourist attraction or park and wondered what it was like inside? We often forget the things that are on our doorstep and I think Spring is the perfect time to explore close to home. Bodium Castle is just a 20 minute car ride from our house and it is the perfect place to visit, with or without the children for a variety of reasons - a historical learning experience, to enjoy its beauty, a good cream tea or lots of grass for the kids to run on.


5) Make the most of your home
Whilst the weather is still warming up there might be days when you just want to stay in and I can't pretend that most people will find spring cleaning a joy, but it is essential to keep on top of the chores. So why don't you set aside a day with the whole family when the weather is not too great. Draw up a list of all those jobs that never seem to get done and each of you tackle a couple. The kids can be involved too.

Then once you have all worked hard enjoy a nice easy buffet lunch and settle down for a family movie with popcorn and a board game. Sometimes the simplest activities can be the most fun.

I hope there is something in my list that you might fancy doing this Spring. Do leave me a comment and let me know what your favourite Spring activity is.
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Tuesday, 7 January 2014

What makes a good marriage?


At the end of December, I posted some photos showing my husband and I through our nineteen-year relationship. I didn’t really share any words, except to mention that life is very different now to how we ever imagined but that we are happy with that.

One of the comments on that post said they would love to hear my views on what makes a successful marriage and I thought why not, it is something I am very passionate about. Last summer I wrote a post titled ‘No one said it would be easy’ and I outlined in that what a strong and lasting marriage is for me –
“I didn't go into my marriage thinking that every day would be a dream, nor that I would always feel 'in love' with my husband every day. I fully realise that a good marriage is about hard work, compromise, upset, difficult decisions and angst as well as the flip side of joy, delight, companionship, support, respect and contentment.”
I also said that I realised my version of a good marriage is not what most people want to hear, they want to know that marriage is filled with passion and exuberant times and of course, it is not at all doom and gloom. Getting married is one of the best things I have ever done, it turned my world upside down and led me into opportunities and new choices that I never knew were possible. For me, it is extra special as it was marrying that led my husband and I to become Christians and to find a way to live life differently.

While I was musing what it is that makes a good marriage I put the question out to some blogger friends, both Christians and those not overtly of any faith. It seems that people like to share on this subject and I ended up with a whole wealth of useful information and perspectives. 

In fact I ended up with so much that I need to split this into two posts, so this first instalment will be what makes a good marriage and then tomorrow I’ll post what makes a good Christian marriage and it will be interesting to see if perspectives differ.

For now I'll hand you over to some prominent bloggers, who share their advice for a successful marriage -

The American Resident - I think never taking the marriage, the partnership, the friendship or each other as individuals for granted is the key. When we start to do that we start to get unhappy and stressed and have to slow down, make time for each other and get back on track. 

DorkyMum - Never ever stop communicating, but be aware that you may have different ways of doing that.

Being Mrs C - Making time for each other without children, date nights make such a difference.

Thinly Spread - Knowing when to shut up. Space for each other's individual stuff - it's a partnership not joined at the hip. Realistic expectations - that mad bit has to mellow or life would grind (!) to a halt. At the end of the day I like him, he makes me laugh, I would rather spend time with him than anyone else.

Pink Oddy – Always stop to look at things from their perspective.

Mari’s World – My husband is also my best friend, there is a mutual respect between us and a desire to make the other happy. Also when we disagree we never harbour the grudge. On the whole try to go to bed with a discussion solved, an apology made and ready to start a new day

Little Lilypad blog - BE SILLY… don’t take yourself too seriously. Laughing always makes everything else easier. 

Kiddy Charts - Don't over analyse what your man says to you - by and large men are simple creatures, and usually what they say is exactly what they mean, unlike us ladies!  

Cambridge Mummy - Go into marriage expecting it to be work - it's not easy, it's not simple, it's hard work and is something that always has to be worked at. There's no coasting. There's no easy option. And I know that this sounds really negative, but I believe that after nearly 10 years together, we are only just starting to scratch the surface of making it work. And as hard as I find it - and I do find it hard, being a grown up and being married - I don't regret it one bit. It's the best thing I ever did.  

Actually Mummy - Tolerance, not expecting romance and passion.  In fact she wrote a fab post on this very subject here.

Boo, Roo and Tigger too - Understanding what is important to either one of you. I love to tell Mr Boo all about my day as soon as he gets home as I've missed my best friend, whilst I know he may have had a long busy day he lets me chat away knowing that once I have told him everything I will relax and unwind for the evening. 

The Crazy kitchen - My mum once said to me "Helen, you just have to learn to live with it" ...referring to the annoying things that both my husband & dad do...she's been married for 48 years so I suppose it works..

Keynko - An understanding that normal life is not a Hollywood romance, it is dull and difficult - but always strive to reach a happy ending.

Mums The Word - My advice would be to try and see the positives in each other. Yes, it bugs me that my Husband doesn't put his washing in the basket and he's practically allergic to washing up, but he's very kind and does everything he can to make me and Sausage happy, which is so much more important than the small, stupid things. 

I think we have some real gems in there. Of course, every marriage is different and my stance would be to establish with your partner what is important to you both, as long as fundamentally you both like each other and you go into your marriage knowing who you are and who they are with realistic expectations then you should be able to make it work but it will take work, never ever expect it to be an easy ride!

Thanks so much to everyone for their input, tomorrow I'll post the next instalment with all the advice shared by my Christian blogger friends.

Have a blessed week, Mich x