Monday 11 March 2013

Happy Mothers Day

Dh has been teaching the kids valuable lessons in the kitchen

I had the most delightful day yesterday and you know what? I want to write about it on my blog, not because I want to show off to you, nor because I want to divide mothers into those who have great days and those who don't but there is a really simple reason why I want to write about it here. And that is because this is my blog, my personal memory of three children growing up.

When I first wrote on this blog in 2008 I said I was writing this blog for me, it is something for me to look back on and to share with family and friends. My Mum does not live close enough that she will see the cards the kids made for me but I know she will be pleased to look at them and that matters.

So I really am very sorry if you had a bad day yesterday and it is not good if you felt pressured to have perfect children and a super-fun day. But really no-one else puts that pressure on you except yourself, if you feel this day is full of commercialism and you don't want to be part of it, don't.  You are an adult and you can make that choice and in doing so you teach your children to be assertive and to go with what is important to them, instead of going with the crowd.

I love the tissue flowers the girls made me, they had stickers on them with beautiful bible verses on them which mean a lot. They all made me personalised chocolate bars at school and just look at that butterfly card JJ made, that will be cherished forever.

Yesterday the most expensive gift I received cost £3 and I promise you I was 100% content. I just had the most wonderful day but that does not mean I did nothing - I cleared up the breakfast things, I put a wash on, I folded washing. I do not see Mothering Sunday as a day to make my husband a slave to me, we are a team and I'm lucky that he did help the kids cook me breakfast in bed and then he cooked us all a wonderful roast later in the day but we work together. We also had a lad from church come over for a couple of hours to play as that makes him happy and that has to be more important than me being able to say I sat on a couch and did nothing all day.

Mothering Sunday is a long held day in the Christian calendar, originally it was about all servants being given the day off work so they could return home to their 'mother' church and spend the time with their family. Along the way to church the children of the families would often pick wild flowers and then display them in church or give them to their own mothers. Today for me, Mothering Sunday is a day when we celebrate those who mother, that could be the Sunday school teacher, grandparents, friends, God parents, voluntary leaders of groups such as Rainbows and Brownies - it is all the people who mother or take on mothering roles.

For my children Mothering Sunday is the day when they show me how much they love me. No they do not need a special day to do that but do you know how excited they were to keep their special handmade gifts a secret from me and then to cook me breakfast and serve it to me in bed? In allowing them to do that they learn gratitude, love and a servants heart, all things I want my children to know.

Thank you dh, JJ, Miss E and Miss M for a lovely day yesterday, I really appreciate each and every one of you.

A special mention goes to my own Mum, who is wonderful. We have a truly fabulous relationship and she taught me how to be a mother. My overriding thoughts yesterday were of her as her own Mum died just a month ago, so how raw must that have been? But she took time to remember the great times they shared and she went with her sister to the crematorium and paid respects to the Mum she adored. Then  my brother did his bit and took her out. Looking forward to seeing you soon Mum. xx
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