Reasons to be Cheerful (The On A Break Edition!) Week 43

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I know, I  Know!  I am not supposed to be here, I'm on a bloggy break but here is the thing. I was never going to let #R2BC slip and I was so busy enjoying myself since I decided to have a break last Friday that I have not got organised and arranged for anyone to be guest host today, so here I am!

You quite like seeing me here though, right?

So I am now feeling super cheerful and have loved my week without pressure.  Let me share some of the things that have made me cheerful -

1. Taking my Mum and Nan out for lunch on Sunday and then on to the park so the kids could play and have an ice cream, the simple things with family are the best!

2.  Having a night out with dh on Monday and no children to come home to.  Yes I felt poorly but with some decent cold and flu tablets we managed a nice meal and the cinema.  Then this morning as there was no kids I did not wake until 9am, that really is a treat!

3. I have been in bed by 11pm ready to sleep every night since last Thursday.  That is a big one and could account for why I feel so much better.  Some nights I have been asleep by 10pm and I have been on the PC for a total of about 2 hours in the last 4 days in total - massive change!

4. The finally yesterday I started my diet.  I am now trialling @Slimavite shakes and following their bite plan.  This is day 2 and I am doing good, thank the Lord.  As well as using the shakes I am following all my guidance I have learned from my Eating Disorders meeting over the last couple of years and I have a food sponsor who I contact daily to commit my food to.  That way when I feel like going off plan I know I have to think twice as I am accountable to them, God and myself! 

I am pleased to report that I like the Slimavite shakes, I was a bit dubious as although I have done shake diets before I have always used pre-made shakes and I assumed the ones you have to mix yourself might not be as nice.  So far I have had the chocolate and vanilla flavours and I like them a lot.  You get a special metal ball to go in the shaker and this seems to really help mix them well and produces a good frothy milkshake and the kids keep eyeing them up!  I have managed to discourage them by telling them my shakes are full of vegetables!

So there we go, I'm feeling good and positive and ready for tomorrow....  but nothing really has changed, I'm still taking my break.

Guest hosting #R2BC over the next few weeks are -

Thursday 3rd November 2011  A Matter of Choice

Thursday 10th November 2011  Kate on Thin Ice

Thursday 17th November 2011  Seasider in the City

Thursday 24th November 2011 Bod for Tea

Thursday 1st December 2011 Lakes Single Mum

and then it will be back with me...

Over to you, what is making you cheery this week? If you are new to Reasons to be Cheerful, then check out HERE and then link up a cheery/ gratitude post from the last week.

As you know, sadly I won't be round to visit everyone but don't let that stop you going and reading and commenting on others that have linked up.  Don't forget reasons to be cheerful is all about spreading the cheer!

Thanks for all the wonderful comments, tweets and emails I have had in the last week.  My bloggy mates rock! Mich x

Hi, I am Mich and I'm Unhappy

It's true, I have known for a while but I have been stuffing it down, eating to stifle my feelings.  Not wanting to deal with it but how long can that go on for?

Forever some may say, but I am not prepared to keep on going through life living it half-heartedly.  I want to feel joy every day and to know I am fulfilling my potential and doing what I can.  It is not fair on those around me that I am only present half the time and the other half buried in my addictions.

This sadness has been going on too long now.

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I truly believe I have a pretty blessed life, there are no major problems I have to deal with.  I have a good family, a husband, my children, a stable job with good hours, a nice home and enough money to buy the essentials we need.  So why do I not feel fulfilled and happy?

I don't believe I am depressed, I expect a number of people will read this and tell me to get myself off to the doctor and get checked out but I do not think there is a need for that.  I think the root of my problem is my addiction.  My addiction to food that is.  I have known for such a long time that I have a problem with food, the years of yo-yo dieting are testament to that.  It is not a lack of willpower, I am not weak.  I am ill, I do not have the mental triggers that tell me I have had enough to eat and for some strange reason when I feel any kind of emotion in my life, be it good or bad my instant reaction is to eat.  I even get a headache and the first thought I have is that chocolate may make it better.

Last night I went to my eating disorder meeting, it is one of the anon fellowships and as such I am not supposed to talk about it in a public place where my identity is known and I was so grateful to be there and to be anongst people who understand how difficult life is as an addict.  Being addicted to food is no easier than being an alcoholic or drug addict but the difference is that I cannot go cold turkey with food, I have to keep eating and that makes it feel very difficult to tackle.  It means I have to learn the art of moderation and limiting myself.  To do this all the anon fellowships advise that you must admit that your life has become unmanageable and that you must give up your control and allow a power greater than yourself to solve the problem for you.  Big stuff, big and scary.

But I feel like I am ready.  I am not willing to walk this half-death march anymore.  I want to fall in love with my husband again, I want to engage with my children and I want to love my body. Inside I feel bitter and twisted, like I am so hard done by and that others have it so much easier than me and I know this is not the truth but it sure feels like it right now.

So I made a decision last night to take a break from blogging.  To give myself some space to have time to read, pray, meditate and concentrate on sorting out the most important part of my life - what is inside me and what is negatively effecting those in a close relationship with me.  I am going to be starting my diet again very soon and using @Slimavite and just focusing on me and who I am and what I like about myself.  Only when I re-find that can I come back and blog again.

I realise that I have been cross-addicting.  Blogging and social media has become my secondary addcition, sometimes at the moment I sit in front of the laptop and wonder why I am there and feel really unhappy and unloved and I just know I am searching for something that a computer can never give me, so I give-in and I will stop.

I will really miss everyone, I have the jitters already.  I know this will be hard but I am going to really try to stay away.  I have made some review commitments and I will still fulfil those, so you may see the odd post go up but the 5 or 6 hours I spend at least 4 nights a week will now be channeled into me and learning to love and respect myself again and whilst I would love to blog that journey, I know that blogging would suck all my time away. So I am giving myself a break and hope to see you all again in December....

I will set up some guest hosts for Reasons to be Cheerful and will post about that soon.

Love you all,  Mich xx

Parents Evening: Pleased As Punch!

So today was parents evening at the kids school and for once dh and I got to go together and without any children.  What a difference it makes to be able to listen to the teachers without any small children or babies distracting one or the other of us.

I think the title gives the gist of this post away. We had a great evening, especially with the feedback we received about JJ.  I am so super proud of my little man that I wanted to shout it from the roof tops and falling that I had to do what I do best, tell you all.  But do not for a moment think that this post is a big boast about how smart my kids are, this is a post from a Mummy who has been so worried about one of her children and how they fit in at school and in the wider world that when I hear something as positive as tonight I just want to yelp with delight!

This time last year JJ was starting in year 2 and he found the transition from year 1 to 2 incredibly hard.  Poor Mr W who used to get told by JJ 'But that's not how Mrs C used to do it, she did it the proper way' etc.  JJ not meaning to be rude or out of line was just in his mind helping the new teacher Mr W to understand the 'way things are done round here'.

I know I have told you before that JJ is undergoing numerous meetings and tests as he is assessed for a communication disorder assessment (Aspergers or such).  These first started in about November 2010 so we have been in the system a while now being passed from place to place but as time passes and JJ just seems to grow into his own skin and mature I feel sure that really there is little to fear. The child that believed the world just revolved around him has learnt he is a part of a much bigger picture and that he has to let other kids get involved too.

Since this term started I have wanted to approach his teachers (he has 2 job share teachers) to see how he was doing but I have held myself back, knowing that if there was an issue they would call me in. From this time last year catching up with his teacher most days to see how his behaviour had been and how much he had called out and 'talked out of turn' to this year being told they can see how hard he is trying and what a pleasure he is to have in the class, so helpful and with a massive thirst for knowledge.  Whilst it is wonderful to hear he is above average for Maths, Science, comprehension and gifted in ICT the best present I received today was to hear a completely and utterly positive and glowing report about my little man and his developing social skills and comprehension of the subtleties and unspoken rules of life.

So JJ, one day you may read this and you will know that Mummy thinks you are amazing, overcoming the obstacles that you have found in life. Thank you so much for being open to all the new things you need to try out and learn to help with your co-ordination and mobility issues.

As for my two little princesses, the reports were exactly as dh and I said they would be before we went:

Miss M - Confident, assertive, bossy, thirst for knowledge, good understanding of the world around her, good with her numbers, sounds and sound blending for words, in a hurry, not good at applying herself to just one task, in other peoples business and lots of fun.

Miss E - Shy at times, slower to learn but far more thorough, happy to apply herself diligently to one task at a time, good with art and abstract tasks, makes friends easily, fits in with people, can become embarrassed and then silly when corrected and generally a good all-rounder.

It is that time of the year, have you had your parent:teacher consultations yet?

Sadly So Many Of Us Have Miscarried, Let's Call For Better Care...

Mumsnet have started a campaign for better miscarriage care and this is a fabulous thing and I am totally behind them.  Sadly I am a bit late and should have been joining in with this last week but let's be honest, it does not matter what week I post as long as I post and ask you all to try and do your bit to help as well.

Statistics say that 1 in 3 women will miscarry at some point, I am one of them. Last year I miscarried my fourth child. Samuel Noah he was to be called and he would have been one this November but instead of crawling round my feet he is safe with Jesus and even though I am comforted by that thought it does not take away the angst and longing for my missing baby. A devastation and pain caused by a miscarriage should never be underestimated.

Before I had children I always prayed that I would not have to suffer a miscarriage, I just knew this would be such a terrible thing to experience.  I remember saying 'Please Lord, it is one thing to not get pregnant but quite another to miscarry'.  It may seem strange to say but I am glad that if I had to suffer a miscarriage it was after I had my children.  Of course having other children does not make it OK but for me it certainly made it more bearable, I had to focus on my family and keep going and that really helped my healing.

When I read some posts around miscarriage I know that I was lucky in the care I received.  Yes I waited 3 hours for my scan, the one that confirmed my babe had died inside me 4 weeks before but all the people I came into contact with at the hospital were friendly and professional.  The sonographer was lovely, she spoke sympathetically to me and the doctor I saw afterwards explained everything thoroughly and sent me away with my choice to make. When I came back in to be checked after the actual miscarriage took place they saw me immediately and kept me separate to the still pregnant mothers.  I was offered a post-mortem and a funeral for my babe.  My hospital did good for me and for that I am very thankful.

Many women do not receive any kind of acceptable level of care when they miscarry, they are pushed aside and sometimes denied access to scans and appointments.  From what I saw when I gave birth to my children maternity care is not highly regarded and wards are short-staffed and those there are overworked, this does not make for a satisfactory birth experience.  This is why Mumsnet have started their campaign.

You do not need to be a blogger to support this campaign, you just need to believe that good care is important for any woman that is going through the awful experience of miscarriage.

If you want to read my story of miscarriage then take a look here, I blogged a lot about my miscarriage and how I dealt with my grief, I feel it is very important to show other women that miscarriage happens to so many of us and it is nothing to be ashamed of.

If this sensitive topic is affecting you or those you know right now then my prayers are with you.

Listography: Top 5 Keyword Searches on my Blog

I love listography, I think it is fab and I often read but for some reason I just rarely get to join in but then thinking about it I rarely join in any linky nowadays except my own. Then when I saw the topic of this weeks I knew I had to join in and have a good read of some others.  For a while I have been pondering a post about key word searches as so many strange things seem to show up and you just wonder how people arrive at your blog with something so random!

So without further ado, I'll cut to the chase and share -

1. Peppa Pig World - I suppose to be expected, I gave away tickets for Peppa Pig World and it was very popular, every day I get a ton of hits on the blog for my reviews of Peppa Pig World.  Ohh I love a lucrative review.

2.  Sex Mummy - Just what I have always wanted, to be searched for with this term. It links to this post where JJ, the 6 year old discuses sex with me.  I bet they are sorely disappointed.

3. Belly Blowing - OK, don't even ask.  I just have no idea at all!  Suppose I should google it myself and see what it links to.

4. Ready to pop twin belly - I love this one, it makes me smile each time I see it.  Go on and have a look here and see the hugest belly!

5.  Anorexic 10 year old - and if the one above makes me smile, this one makes me want to cry.  I have a friend with a now 11 year old anorexic daughter and I get so many hits for my posts on childhood eating disorders.

One of the funnier hits I have had from search engines was on the keywords '18 YO naughty school girl' - who me?? never.  I am sure I have never *cough* posted about that.

It still makes me laugh that a guy found my blog back in December 2010 searching for yummy mummies and even when he found it was something completely different he still stuck around and commented on my parenting skills!

....and that's me.  I'll look forward to reading yours.

Ohh and over on my other blog I reviewed some samples of the Cindy Crawford Meaningful Beauty skin care range, how I now wish that I had put it on this blog.  That one post receives about 50 search engine landings every single day.  Even now, 8 months after it was posted. Amazing huh?

Halloween: Do Your Kids Go Out and Beg?

OK, this isn't going to be a post that will win me any popularity contests, it may go down as one of those with no comments but I feel a need to get this off my chest.

Why let your kids go round the streets and beg on this one night a year? 

I really struggle to understand this.  I know that my view is in the minority as nearly everyone else I know is planning stuff for Halloween, well all my secular friends that is. Am I just no fun? Is Halloween harmless?

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As a a child growing up I longed to get dressed up and to go trick or treating, especially after watching ET and seeing how big and amazing it all appears in America but my Dad was adamant that no child of his would beg door to door and I just did not get this.  My friends were allowed to, so why not me? I now get it and funnily enough I agree, you hear of so many elderly people being scared on this one night of the year, all these kids and youths approaching their doors and asking for goodies and sometimes demanding money, possibliy when they just do not have anything spare to offer.  I have heard of people sat in dark houses hoping that any trick or treaters might just pass them by assuming they are out.  No-one should be scared to be in their home or afraid to open their door.  Surely that is reason enough to stop trick or treating?

I expect most of you reading this are responsible parents, you go out with your kids when they trick or treat and you maybe even only visit the houses in your street that you know would be open and receptive.  Harmless fun you describe it as but what is it teaching our kids at the most fundamental level?  It teaches them that they can ask for something nice and if they don't get it they are quite at liberty to play a trick and be naughty.  Hmm good life lesson - not! When would we ever promote this kind of behaviour at any other time?

As you'll know I am a Christian and I only became a Christian in 2002, so I am still a baby, still learning and in this time I have never been preached to about the perils of Halloween and why it is a bad thing.  Many religions seem to tolerate it and think nothing of it but I just believe it is wrong.  Halloween is all about spirits and ghoulish things. To my mind these are all of the Devil and of course he is the polar opposite to what I believe is Holy and therefore I just can not bring myself to allow my kids to celebrate or be involved in anything to do with Halloween.

I could not believe the other day how mature JJ is becoming.  He has never been allowed to trick or treat but when he was 5 he was so desperate that he dressed in fancy dress (a cowboy) and we went out for a walk and he gave our sweets to those children who were trick or treating.  This felt OK to me as we were offering a treat rather than being asked for it and JJ enjoyed himself.  I now realise this probably sent a very mixed message and was not a great idea at all.

We have also given sweets to the children who knock at our door and  I was chatting to JJ the other day and he questioned that if Halloween was not a good thing and it was celebrating all things dark and bad then surely we should no longer give out sweets as otherwise we are just encouraging people to believe that Halloween is OK. My mouth dropped and I had to agree he has a strong point, so this year we will not be opening our door to any trick or treaters.

On October 31st this year we will be going to a light party at a local church, a party which will focus on celebrating the light of Jesus Christ rather than the dark of this world. I expect most parents would not want to be known as Satan worshippers, but effectively in celebrating Halloween that is what I believe you are doing.  That's quite a statement isn't it?  Sorry if it offends but do think on it and ponder what it is about Halloween that you want your children to learn.

How about you?  What do you think then? Is Halloween harmless fun?

Reasons to be Cheerful - The Upside Down Edition

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Any of you that have joined in with this linky for any amount of time will know that there comes the weeks when you think 'blah, I can't be bothered!  Nothing much is going on in my life, what have I got to be cheerful about?'  and for you there is a choice to be made. Do you post anyway and work your way through that unhappiness, lethargy or whatever it is that is causing you to feel that way or do you say 'OK, I'll give it a miss this week?'.

Well I do not get that choice.  I am the host of #R2BC and as such I need to post otherwise there will be nowhere for you all to link up.

So today is the upside down edition, I'll do the Pollyanna thing and post about the stuff that is making me feel a bit gloomy and overwhelmed at the moment and then turn it around and remind myself that actually I am blessed I am just not seeing the wood for the trees!

1. I have one good day dieting and then it goes to pot again.  I bore myself with how bad I am at sorting out my weight right now but I suppose the flip side has to be that I am so lucky to have enough food to eat.  It is hard not to think that and then take a stick to beat myself about the poverty in the world and my gluttony.  I pray one day I'll be able to do something about this.
2. I feel like I have a million and one product reviews to write up.  In reality there is probably more like ten but when you have busy head syndrome that feels like ten too many.  The flip side has to be all the great products we have received and some superb toys I have stashed away now for a rainy day.
3. Last night I dreamt about a quiz I am organising for the PTA at school.  In my dream it was the quiz night and I had done nada.  Once I stop procrastinating it will be sorted in next to no-time, at least the dream has given me a kick up the bum to sort it out.
4. Everything is in flux at work at the moment, big changes are impending and who knows what they will lead to for me. As was commented to me yesterday in my appraisal I do not like to be out of control and that is so true, so all this uncertainty is not good for me but again a flip side being that God has my best interests at heart and if I just trust then the best is yet to come...

So there we go, I turned the bad stuff round and it is a good exercise, your mind believes what you feed into it.  So for the nest few days I must feed positive thoughts and stop procrastinating.  I have 2 days off work now and the kids are at school - gym and crap sorting here I come.

I'll leave you with a couple of pictures from my weekend away to Clacton with dh and the kids, this is probably the reason to be cheerful that I should have been posting about, a weekend away with no computer and lots of time together as a family.  It was great!

So I expect you know the protocol by now, write a cherry post, link it up and go and visit some other blogs on the linky. In fact go and visit all the other blogs on the linky, it is always fab to find some new reading material. Leave me some comment love and I'll come and do the same for you. Check out here if you are new to #R2BC and want to read the full low down.

Thanks for joining in, great to see new people cropping up each week and lovely to have some men on board too now.

Mich x

Do I want to Work Full-Time?

Things are changing at work, my boss of the last few years is leaving and I am now at the point where I am thinking 'do I want her job?'  I easily know the answer to that - yes I do. I have never made a secret of the fact that this was the job I fancied, it is one I have done before in other industries and call me big-headed but I think I would be pretty good at it.

(Now if you are reading this and you work at the same place as me, do not assume that I know any more than you, I am purely surmising about her job being up for grabs).

I started with my current employer just over 7 years ago and I have always been upfront and told my manager that the job I wanted was hers but for me it comes with a cost.  I am pretty sure that my Director of HR will not consider anything except full-time in that role.  Yes I could put forward for a job-share as I work now but I would need someone to share with me that I could really trust. Who knows if I would find them at that level.

So the question I am left with is 'do I want to work full-time?'  No, is my instant reaction, I am loving my balance of part-time working now the kids are at school.  Two school days to myself to get all the jobs done and some time to myself to exercise, blog, get my hair cut or even just visit the doctor without 3 parrots accompanying me.

Is an extra £23K a year worth me having to work full-time, not having a moment to myself and putting all 3 kids into childcare before and after school for five days a week.  My gut reaction was that I would not be that much better off financially and why would I do it? I felt I ought to crunch and numbers and see how it came out, childcare would be about £900 a month on a normal month and then do not even ask in the school holidays.  Over £5500 a year on childcare was what I calculated, sounds a lot doesn't it?  Even after this and the increase in tax/ NI etc I realised that I would in actual fact take home an extra £800 a month after the childcare, that's not too bad is it? About £10.80 an hour for the additional 18.5 hours per week I'd do  That could probably buy me the new kitchen that I am desiring, a couple of good abroad holidays a year or some serious spending each month.

But it comes back down to the basics - is this what I want?  To get home at 5.30pm at night and then to have to deal with 3 tired kids that have been in care since 8am that morning, to have to cook dinner or feel bad that we are eating ready food, to wash and iron in the evening, to clean on the weekends, to be grouchy with my kids when they ask to play a game with me as I have too many chores to do. Would I have to hire a cleaner, gardener?  Tell, me how do people cope with the daily stuff of life when both parents work full-time and you have young kids.  Do the chores just slip?  The other day I left work at 4.30pm (so pretty early), dh was at work until late so I picked the kids up and then did tea, baths, time with each of the kids reading or playing and I did the normal chores, washing, clean up kitchen, load dishwasher etc.  You know, just the normal and it was 8.55pm before I sat down for my time.  That really did not feel like a life I would choose to lead each day.

Surely I would miss out on the simple stuff?  When would I have the chance to capture simple moments like JJ watching the frog bounce around outside.  Like the girls running in the playground before school or decorating cakes after school.

Looking at this and thinking it thorough has been a good exercise for me.  It has showed me how little money means to me.  I have decided that even if this job was an extra £30per hour I would not go for it.  Nothing will take away my time with my children while they are small.  The girls are just 4 and JJ and is 8 and I like to help them with their homework after school, to chat to them about their day on the leisurely scoot or walk home and to drop into the park with friends on a sunny day.  Big earnings will not make me a better parent and I am glad I can see that.

Luckily I have a very sensible dh and we got on the property ladder fairly early and did not over extend ourselves, so we have no big 4 bedroom detached house to pay for and thus we can choose to live moderately and to enjoy our time together even if we do have a busted front door and a 30 year old kitchen.  Do the kids think about these things?  No, not at all.  When they are older and think back to their childhood at home I hope they will remember baking in the kitchen,  junk modelling in the dining room and playing games with Mummy and Daddy. Far more valuable memories than the after school club can provide each day.  Now if my Mum and Dad lived locally it all could be a different story...

Just to say, do not think I am judging anyone, we all do what suits us and our families.

If you work full-time do let me in on your secret, how do you keep a balance and where do you get the time from to sort the house stuff?

The Best Christmas Present Ever for Under £10

Take a look at the photo.  Does that look like the best Christmas present ever?  Probably not. 

One your child would be happy to receive? Maybe not. 

Kids in the UK tend to expect big, expensive presents don't they?  This is not big and it certainly was not expensive but I still maintain that it is, in fact, one of the best presents for under £10 ever.

You know what though?  There are millions of children (literally, I am not exaggerating) who would think this is an awesome gift, one they would love to receive and would treasure.

You may have seen me post before about the Operation Christmas Child campaign which is run by Samaritans Purse.  Basically, you fill a covered shoebox with new but inexpensive gifts and pay £5 transport costs (it was £2.50 back in 2011) and Samaritans Purse transport this box to a child who would otherwise receive nothing. 

I won't go through all the information again about how to make a box and what to do with it, that is in this post and this post and of course, you can look at the OCC website but often I hear people say to me how expensive it is to make a box and I just wanted to show you how I do it for so little. You can also look into educational gift ideas, if you want something a little different. 

Here is a list of what I included in this box in 2011 (but I still manage to pack a box for around the same amount in 2020 too) -

• M&S Scarf - Bought last January in the sales for 80p
• Mint Humbugs - 79p at Pound Stretcher
• Pack of crayons and pencils - given to my kids at a party (they have too many already, so donated for the boxes)
• Tiger face cloth - blogging gift, so no cost
• Camay soap - (£1 for 4 from Poundstretcher) 25p
• Tambourine - was my girls but never really used, so like new, no cost
• Toothbrush and toothpaste - Lidl £1.58
• New McDonald's toy in the packet - no cost
• Notebook - (£1 for 4 from Poundstretcher) 25p
• Small dinosaur/ horse toys - from party bags my kids received, no cost
• Snap game - Received with a meal at the Rainforest cafe - no cost
• Ben 10 beach ball - Tesco 50p in the sale
• Pack of 3 biros - Tesco, 30p in the sale
• 2 pencils - £1 shop (£1 for 10) 20p
• Winnie the Pooh ball game - from a cracker last Christmas - no cost

Total cost for contents -  £4.67 plus £2.50 transport cost = £7.17 total box cost

The key is in the planning and the preparation.  All year round I keep my eyes open for bargains and I retain things that the kids are given. Rather than them have an abundance of stationary and things that will just get broken or binned I ask the kids if they want to donate them to the shoebox appeal.  Nine times out of ten I get a yes from my kids as they enjoy giving.  Isn't that something you want to say about your child?

Go on, make a box this October, I promise you will feel good for doing it.

Why not pin this post for later?

#SilentSunday - An Amazing Day

Reasons to be Cheerful - The Birthday Boy Edition

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Week 40 of #R2BC, can you believe it?  But you know what that means, just 12 weeks until next year, or 11 weeks until Christmas, wow that feels soon.

I have been feeling a bit emotional this week and that is not massivley like me but on Tuesday my JJ turned 8 and it has really hit me that he is growing up and getting really quite big and in the main becoming a lovely lad, one I am pleased to be Mummy to. People often comment about how mature he is (well in some ways, not toilet humour of course!).

So this week my reason to be cheerful are all around my handsome fella -

• We are pretty broke at the moment, so much needing doing around the house that we are having to be good and as I am sure you have heard me rant in recent weeks, I am fed up with stuff and buying things for the sake of it.  So we kept JJ's birthday very low key in terms of presents.  From dh, I and his sisters he received a pair of PJ's (so comfy Mum), a pair of trackie bottoms (Oh they are nice) and a DVD (you know I love Veggie tales don't you mum?)  and he was made up.  I spent the sum total of about £15 on him and he was content.  I love that about him, long may it last.  Yes he also received near £200 from everyone else and is now pondering a 3DS or DSi XL.
• We are having a weekend in Clacton at a carvan park this weekend. JJ decided that he would like a weekend away rather than a party and when I can book with Tesco deals vouchers, who am I to argue with that? We are taking JJ's 7 year old cousin with us so we will have 4 excited kids - wish us luck!  This could really go either way, I am a bit worried when the boys Mum and Grandma both wish me luck when I say about him coming with us.
• I have even more deals vouchers that we will be using to help fund the weekend.  A day out to Colchester zoo and a meal out as well.
• JJ decided at the weekend that he wanted desserts rather than a birthday cake, so we had chcocolate gateux and cheesecake (his choice) but I felt that we ought to just mark the actual day so we had some chips from the chip shop and a chocolate cake from Aldi, it cost £1.29 and tasted good.  Can you believe that?  Just shows you can have fun on a budget.
• JJ and I topped his birthday off with a few games of wobbly chef and some cuddles with Holby City.  A great night.

So how are you all this week?  Feeling grateful?  No, well then this is your perfect opportunity to turn it around, count your blessings, write a post and link up.  If you are new to #R2BC then check out HERE for more info.

Sorry I did not get round to everyone last week, it was a tad busy with the MADS, I will try to get to eveyone this week but I will have a PC free weekend while we are away.  Need to spend some time with my handsome hubbie and remember why I fell in love with him.

Over to you....

Notes from the Heart... The #Mumentum Edition

Scales,

Do you have to be so honest with me? What is a little lie between friends. I was dong so well when I lost 10lb in one week, how have I managed to put 5lb of that back on. What? It was the cakes and sweets that I have started to eat again. OK point taken, you could be right. I need to cut those out this week.

Cheers from the one who has been found out.
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Dear Camera Makers,

Have any of you ever considered making a camera which can knock a couple of stone off a person when it takes a photo?  What about an adjustable gage so you can say how much weight to knock off the person when the photo is taken.

I have looked at the photos from the MADS last Friday and whilst I felt I looked good (yes fat, but good) when I looked in the mirror, I see the photos and they tell me another story.

Posing with Ruth, Geek Mummy and Nickie, Typecast

Hey Slimavite,

Where are my shakes?  I am really looking forward to starting my diet with you and getting going but I need the shakes here to be able to do that.

With anticipation, Mich x
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Dear Self,

Are you really looking forward to starting your diet again?  Come on be honest.  If you can not be honest with yourself then we do not have a lot of hope.

Remember it will be hard work and at times it may be boring but it will be so worth it if you can just apply yourself and keep with it, look how stunning Lou looked when you saw her Friday, use that as your motivation to know Slimavite works.

From straight talking Mich
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Dear Bed,

Thank you so much for being cosy, I really love you and at the moment you are doing a great job of enticing me in at a decent time.  This is making a difference and I feel refreshed.  Long may this last.

From sleepy head
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Dear addict,

I hate you, go away!  I will conquer you.  One day soon I will no longer find it hard to resist all the things that I know are bad for me.  I will feel able to deal with what life throws at me without turning to you to comfort me and stifle my emotions, pushing away any bad feelings that I have.  I intend to grow stronger and to handle my life without you......  Be Gone!

From the one who will conquer
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You get the picture?  I am not on form at the moment.  I had every intention to be good again today and had my slimfast for breakfast and then by 10am I was starving and the time of the month hit me yet again and that was it, I gave in.  I did not even really try to resist if I am honest.  Tomorrow I must remember to get up and pray and ask for help, for I can not do this alone.

The Day After the MAD Night Before!

The question on my lips all day has been 'was it worth it?'

Thankfully I have not been sick today, even after a ton of booze my sensible head kicked in and we went for food and water before falling asleep.  I think I shocked my lovely roomie @Kykaree when I stumbled into the room just before 3am but still look my false eyelashes and make up off, cleaned my teeth and washed my face - yes I really am that boring!

Today has been a day of waking up too early, feeling pretty darn awful, that sort of half death feeling, sweating alcohol and neglecting my kids. Thankfully dh was here looking after them so when I crawled into bed about 2pm and did not get out again until close to 7pm it was OK. A wasted day yes but thankfully OK. So many times I have felt like shouting 'shut up', Mummy is tender, I don't like this feeling and no thanks I don't want to eat your plastic food but instead I smiled and nibbled on my strawberry sunday that Miss E lovingly prepared for me.. Next time I am tempted by free booze I will recall this day and think nah, near 4 bottles of win does not suit you Mich!

But back to that question, 'was last night worth how crap I have felt all day?'  In the words of Gok Wan 'Hell yes!'

I had a ball last night at the MAD blog awards, sadly I did not win but when you lose to a worthy winner that makes it a lot easier to stomach.  I think Jane took it to extremes though when she hid her MAD award down her boobs so I could not get to it! Look at that smug face...

It is a long time since I have really let my hair down like I did last night.  I had just the best time as I stayed with some people who I really value and now class as good friends. We started with a superb Turkish late lunch with @AllforAleyna showing off her fluent Turkish, I then enjoyed getting ready and everyone seemed to agree that my sparkly silver glitter eyes were pretty cool. I felt special in my new Marks and Spencer outfit complete with sparkly jewelery and bag and boy was I glad I went for the sensible shoes when we realised that the MADS were a standing event this year!

Here I am with the beautiful Liska from New Mum Online, she makes me look like a giant!  Then thanks to Lindy over at Squidgyboo for the full length photo,

Photo Credit

The wine flowed at the awards and I got to say hi to loads of great people and spent time with some diamonds. Later a few of us headed out for al fresco drinks until 1.30am and then on for a burger and chips up Shaftesbury Ave. Thanks @SAHMLovingIt @seasiderclare @clairelouise82 @superamazingmum @bobbity666 @allforaleyna I was so pleased to spend extended time with you all and it was great to get to talk.

I've just seen @Nickie72 tweeting that she does not have many photos of her from the night, so I'll share this treat with you.....  Nickie posing with the one who pretends to be an evil overlord, but look at her - pussycat!

Thanks to all who made last night happen - Sally, Jen, the ton of blogger helpers, TalkTalk, Parentdish and all the sponsors. I'm looking forward to next year already.....  well as long as my gorgeous readers want to vote for me again!

Reasons to be Cheerful - The MADS Edition

<center> <a href="http://mdplife.blogspot.com/search/label/reasons%20to%20be%20cheerful"><img width="150" alt="Reasons to be Cheerful at Mummy from the Heart" src="http://i902.photobucket.com/albums/ac230/RebaMc/reasonstobecheerfulv2-1.jpg" height="150" /></a></center>

How could my reasons to be cheerful be about anything else this week? Selfish, indulgent? Yes. So what? Sometimes we have to look after ourselves and have a bit of fun! Life is about balance after all. Too much seriousness makes Mich a boring bunny.

Tomorrow night is the Mummy and Daddy (MAD) blog awards in London and it is thanks to you super bunch that I will be there as a finalist in the Best Blog about Family Life category. I am super chuffed to be going and very excited. I know that Sally and Jen will have done an amazing job organising the event.

So straight onto my list of MAD reasons -

• After dropping the kids to school tomorrow, I am straight off up to London for a spot of shopping
• Then meeting a load of great bloggers for a late lunch/ early dinner of Tapas
• Checking into the Radission Bloomsbury hotel - which looks super plush!
• I have an outfit provided by Marks and Spencer and I feel so comfortable in it and hubbie tells me I look glamorous. It looked quite plain on the hanger so I have just included a snippet in the monatge below, I'll post a full piccie for you on Saturday.
• I am have had my hair cut this morning
• I applied the fake tan last night and have non-pasty legs for once
• My toe and finger nails are manicured and tidy, sadly the hot pink went out the window for my finger nails as a load have broken but they still look nice.
• I intend to have cuddles with loads of super friends at the awards - Chris, Alex, Clare, Heather, Karen, Nickie, Maggy and a very special hug for Lexy. (and if I have not mentioned you by name I am up for hugs with everyone else too!)
• I am going to have some booze tomorrow night, it is not very often I drink and completely non-existent to get drunk nowadays but tomorrow I might just head that way!

If you fancy tuning in and getting the live news from the MADS then log on to the MADS Blog for about 7pm tomorrow night.  The awards will actually start at 7.15pm. It will be worth it just to see every one's gorgeous outfits. There will be a competition running on the live blog so someone can win £250 of luxury skincare products - sounds good!

My thanks go to Parentdish UK and TalkTalk the main sponsors of the MADS. So over to you, what is making you happy this week? Link up your post now...

Can I Mention the C Word Yet?

Photo by freestocks on Unsplash

Dh and I were sat chatting at the dinner table the other day and I asked if I could mention the C-word yet? ‘Ohhh’ we hear from JJ as he takes a massive gasp ‘Mummy, how naughty. Why do you want to say that?'

Can you guess what he thought I was talking about?

If I say to you the C-word, what do you think?

We had a recent conversation with JJ (who will be 8 soon) where he told me he knew the rudest swear word there was and that it began with a C. You can imagine what I am thinking; I could not believe that my 7 year old has been exposed to that. He then went on to say it ended with a P and of course at that point I breathed a sigh of relief. ‘Crap’ I said very quietly to him and his eyes widened and he said ‘Yes, that’s so rude isn’t it Mummy?’ Of course, I agreed and Dh had to wander off to cover his sniggering.

Now the very rude word or the not so rude word was not what I was referring to, the one I was talking about was Christmas of course. It is late September after all and I have seen the first of our local shops start to open up their dedicated Christmas aisles.

Is it safe to admit to you that I already have all the little presents for my girl’s stockings? JJ is not done yet but he will be pretty soon. I absolutely love being prepared for Christmas and this year I have decided to be even more frugal in my buying for the kids. They will have a great time and will get a good few gifts each but not the stupid amounts that they may have had in years gone by.

If I had my way I would stop Christmas presents for all adults. I hate the ‘tit for tat’ of it sometimes, especially when you get the people who want nothing, except a specific present like a bottle of booze. I give you some booze and socks, you give me some money and I put it back in the bank. Can we not just cut that out and just make it about the kids and the true spirit of sharing good times?

Looking After Mich

What use are we to other people when we are not taking care of ourselves? That is the question I have been asking myself just recently and the truth is not a lot.  We think we are doing the right thing by putting the emphasis on them and looking after their needs but in the end we lose out. I know for me I just end up tired, crabby and bitter.  Hmm that sounds like a Mich you all want to hang out with doesn't it?

So I was pleased this week to have yet again realised that I must look after myself. More for myself than anyone else, I am listing the areas that I must look after  -

1. Sleep.  I need to make sure I am getting more of this.  I have made headway in the last week, there has not been a night that I have stayed up later than 11.30pm and that is good but not good enough. I need some early nights and to start feeling refreshed.  Dh got up this morning and I had a lie in and it was bliss, so needed. 
2. Exercise. I rejoined the sports village at work last week (yes it really is as spectacular as it sounds, it hosts loads of training Olympians and me, lol!) and I have been to the gym a couple of times and also swam.  My inner thighs are telling me they hate me right now in fact.  I am feeling really good for some exercise and aim to do soem at least 3 times each week.
3. Food. The last week has been bad, I have not been making a concerted effort but I was super chuffed to be asked by Slimavite to be a trailist for them.  So in about a week I will be starting on their bite plan diet and blogging about it so you can all follow my success, for that is what it will be.
4. Saying No. I promise to keep time for myself, to stop saying yes to things and offering to do things.  I must keep some time to myself to just be.  To read and to enjoy my life, not allow it to float past me.

You see that photo there, that is one I use online, it was taken in 2010, when I was about 2 stone lighter than I am now.  I was still far too big but I think I look good and I want to look that happy with the way I look again.

So this is where I am.  I have not weighed for a couple of weeks.  I figure why bother when I am not being particularly good.  I'll weight when I start my new diet plans with Slimavite but for now I have the MADs on Friday and a lovely new outfit from M&S to wear for it - I can't wait!

I am linking this post up for Liska's #Mumentum.  Come and join in if you are a Mum and are trying to lose your mum Tum.

The Sunday Soapbox & Song - I'll Follow You...

Do you ever listen to a song for the first time and it just sends chills through you?

Some songs affect me so much and I find myself on the brink of tears listening to them. Most recently those songs tend to be modern Christian worship songs.

I've shared before that I have a little crush on one of the prominent worship leaders here in the UK. He just has these too cute dimples in his cheeks.... but anyway that is going off track a bit!  It is his voice really that I find so irresistible and the words that he manages to sing and how he glorifies God when he does it.
So today is Sunday and traditionally us Christians head off to Church today and generally have a day filled with awareness of the Lord and the part we play in making His world a better place. So today, I just wanted to share this song with you, this is one that is really speaking to me right now.

It talks of living a life that please God and boy, how I want to do that.  I have many problems and imperfections but I can only keep trying and I will be kind to myself and acknowledge that I AM making headway.

The songs starts off with 'May the words of my mouth and the thoughts of my heart bless Your name'.  Whether you believe in God or not, don't you agree that the world would be a much better place if we all took time to cleanse our hearts and think about the words we spoke before we said them. The God of the New Testament, Jesus we call Him, is a man who showed us Christians how we should aim to live....  by loving others, all others and by taking the kind path rather than the righteous one. If we all tried to be a little kinder in the world there would not be half as much ugliness and war.  Simple when you think about it!

So there is this weeks challenge for us all. Be kind, in every situation, be kind.

It may be tough.......

Multiples Mayhem Carnival

A bit later than advertised but I have got here.  Finally with a moment to sit down after my very busy week, I have some time to read all the posts submitted for the carnival and what a great evening it has been.

I give you the superb posts from the twin mums of twitter!

We have some newer boggers joining us this time, which is lovely and I'm gonna start you off with a goodie.  Rebecca at Here Come The Girls has posted her highs and lows of having twins. If you have twins older than a year this will be a walk down memory lane for you, the pictures are gorgeous and all those memories of tiny twinnies sleeping together, holding hands and making each other chuckle all came flooding back to me.  Beautiful!

So how many of us have daughters?  Quite a few I think, in fact everyone as far as I can make out except the lovely Karen who has all those handsome boys to look after. So here is a scary thought... we could all become grandmothers of twins, agghh.  There we were thinking that once this batch was done we could rest and actually we may be helping out in the future! Those of us with non-ID twins at least.  They do tend to follow in the family and that is because we pass our ovulation legacy onto our daughters, so us super smart woman that release 2 eggs make more super smart woman who release 2 eggs.  I am not sure whether to be proud or running scared!  Troubles' Mum shares with us an interesting part of her family history as she finds out where her twins came from.

Debbie at Johnson Babies shares with us a post about the items she would recommend as essentials when you have twins. Her twinnies still share a cot at 8 months (and there is a gorgeous piccie of them sharing) and this has worked due to sleep positioners - who even knew such things existed - not me! lol

This summer has been an important one for Mari over at Mari's World, her little twinnies were getting ready to go to pre-school in September and to say they were not impressed with that idea was an understatement.  Watch Mari's vlog and get some great advice from her sister-in-law who is a nursery teacher. Then not to leave us hanging we have the follow up post letting us know how her girls got on for their first day. Do tell us Mari, has it continued this well, are they all settled in now?

After reading Kerry at Multiple Mummy's post I had a massive smile on my face.  She sums up so well how hard is is have three little ones and how life can feel as if it is swallowing you up. Luckily Kerry had a knight in shining armour come and save her over the summer.  Welcome back to the world of big smiles Kerry.

Heather at Young and Younger has blogged about a subject which is obviously close to her heart.  Did you use the Baby Led Weaning method with your twinnies?  She would love to hear about your experiences.

Karen at All About the Boys is a bit of a cheat really, her post is not really a twins post but all her boys are so gorgeous and I like seeing snippets of her house too, so she manages to sneak in to the carnival! This post is a lovely idea and one I may just have to nick.

I better not forget to add in a post from me, had I?  My recent twins inspired post was about recognising my twinnies as individuals.  The girls are now just over 4 years, in full time school and have just separated bedrooms - ohh my big girls!

Before I close this carnival down, I need to go in search of one more post.  This time around our very own twin mummy comedian has not entered a post, so not to be defeated, I'll just add one in anyway! Here Jane at Northern Mum shares with us why she is so excited!

So there we go, just enough to last you about two cuppas!  Read and enjoy....  (oh and don't forget to comment too, everyone loves a good comment).

So who is next then?  Let's get the Multiples Mayhem Carnival on the road again.  Do we have a takers who'd like to host in October/ November?  Leave a comment and we will sort it out.

Reasons to be Cheerful - Keeping it in the Day! Wk 38

Good morning all,

I feel like I have been on a real journey this week, something amazing happened and should not be underestimated. 159 bloggers (mostly parenting) came together and posted to help raise awareness for the petition that Save the Children have to lobby David Cameron to do his part towards making sure that there are enough health workers accross the world. I am not quite sure what number the petition finished on, about 43000 the last time I looked before it ended.

Thank you sincerely to everyone who took time to take part.  Now gang, we have to keep this going. If we all post sporodically we can maintain awareness levels and slowly influence others and get more people on board to lobby for change.

With a week that has been so focused on others, I am taking time today to thank the Lord for all my wonderful reasons to be cheerful.

Today -
I woke in a bedroom my gorgeous Dad has just decorated for us
I woke next to a handsome hubbie in a comfy bed
All the kids slept well and are safe
My children are all at school being educated as I type
We all enjoyed a hearty breakfast this morning and will have two further good meals today
Our clothes are clean and warm
I am meeting a lovely friend for lunch and some great chatting
I have made JJ a routine doctors appointment and he is able to see a professional promptly
I have cleaned my kitchen and it is spotless
Tonight I will go to my eating disorders meeting and enjoy fellowship with those in the same boat
I AM CONTENT!  (That is the biggie)

So what about you?  Tell us your reasons to be cheerful this week.  I will make sure I get to everyone to say hi this week.  If you have posted and want to link up, head over to Mum of all Trades as she is our guest host for this week.  Next week #R2BC returns home to me, Mummy.  I have missed it but have been blessed by all the guest hosts.  Everyone has made me proud looking after our baby and introduced a new joiner or two.  Well done, team effort!

One last plug, if you are wondering what you can do to help Save The Children now the petition is closed, you could give some money to help all those people starving in East Africa due to the drought.  Even £2.00 would make a difference. In fact I'll go without a coffee at lunch today and do just that.

As there are no photos in this post and it is always good to have some visual, I'll share this very short vidow with you.  Made by Lindsay, who on YouTube has a channel called Lilliesarelike she went to Mozambique with @ChristineMosler earlier this year and took this footage, it is brilliant.  These are the smilies your donations will bring.



Thanks all, be blessed.  Mich x

You Can Help Too & Yes it May Make You Sad!

Over the last few days I have been avidly chatting away to anyone who will listen to me, be it in real life, on twitter, via Facebook, on forums or my blog. I have probably been a bit of a bore but I don't care.  I am absorbed at the moment, after going to the Save The Children conference on Saturday I can not seem to focus on anything else really. My heart is aching and my mind is buzzing.

What can I do to help?  People are dying needlessly and that makes me so angry and on the one hand I feel powerless. I am one small human across the other side of the world, I have no power, no real money to speak of and it would be easy to think 'who me, I can not do anything'. I have probably been guilty of that mindset for much of my life. Not now, not anymore, I have been affected, over the last 10 years or so I have been educated, my line of vision has been widened and I see that I can help. We all can help, yes even you!

I am not willing to be apathetic and think this is not my problem, I can not help.  I now say I am one person who may be able to affect a few more.  I have no delusions of grandeur, I don't have 40K followers on Twitter to influence but if I affect 5 people and those 5 people then affect even another 2 or 3 each and they do the same, then we have spread, word of mouth spread.  The best kind.  Dh made me smile the other day when he said I am pyramid selling at the moment and that my pyramid of contacts  is getting bigger each day, he is right.  This is a bit like that, the snowball effect I would say, it does not sound so calculated.

As I have been chatting to people I have heard all sorts of replies that have initially shocked me and made me really down and then I stop and remember that actually it takes a lot of guts for people to be honest and to tell me that they think the problem is too big and therefore why should they bother? Go back 15 years and I may have said the same.

At the conference on Saturday we sat there and listened to Gareth Owen, Director of Emergencies for Save The Children and wow he blew me away.  This was a man with the kind of heart I desire. So many of us in the room were shedding tears when he reminded us 'that we all were letting people die' and that '750K people were about to die'. No softly, softly approach, this is a man who goes out to the developing world and sees the hard face.  He knows the sorrow of the affected people. At the end of his session one person in the audience suggested that the local governments ought to take responsibility and try to sort some of their own problems. Gareth agreed, I think the whole room agreed. He told us that often there was no proper leadership, that the government was little more than some war lords or gangsters. The choice he was faced with was to help and perhaps even keep helping the same country or community again and again or to let them die. When this persons silence suggested we let them die I felt physically sick, just as I do now typing this. That is not humanity, that is genocide.

So to the person who asked the other day 'why posting a blog about Save The Children could help and wouldn't it just make them feel sad', yes it will make you feel incredibly sad, you might also cry and you know what when you are in that state you can do great things. Over the last two days over 130 bloggers have posted about the petition for more health workers in the developing world and that came out of a conference that probably had about 30 of those bloggers there. So another 100 have joined us and I just checked on hashtag tracker and I see that in the last 24 hours an audience of over 1 million has been reached on twitter, from Sunday - Monday that was about 2.6 million.

Surely you can see that is amazing? So anyone and everyone reading this, please help, even in a tiny, tiny way. One alone can achieve little but when we all unite we can achieve anything. I do not post this to chastise or judge anyone, I post this with the hope that you may start to see my point of view.

Something we all can do is sign the petition for more #healthworkers and we can ask our friends and families to do the same.

Then if you want to blog about this, Facebook or twitter mention it (using #healthworkers) then you are raising awareness and spreading the word and believe me that really is equally as important as giving money.

You see those 3 kids there in the photo, they are the reason why I must speak out and do what I can, wouldn't it be amazing if they grew up in a world where there was justice and equality. Where the wealth was spread and all people had access to everything they needed. I know some people say they are broke in the UK right now but often that means they can not afford big Christmas presents for the kids, how about if we could not afford food for a week for our kids? That might give us some perspective.

So come on join me, yes you'll be sad and you may cry. My heart will not seem to stop aching right now but that is nothing in comparison to what is going on for many in the world.