Looking Forward to December 2022

After spending quite some time in the last week reflecting on how things have changed in 2021 and how I have grown and matured, it’s now time to look forward. In one of my many recent emails, I was asked the questions –

Where do I want to be in December 2022?

What would I like to have achieved?

So, that got me thinking and of course, praying, about what my future might hold and I figured it’s no bad thing to visualise how things might look for me in a year's time. After 2021 being such a great year of spiritual growth I don’t want to rest on my laurels. I need to keep pressing on and making myself available to deepen my relationship with God and do His will. The first few things I come up with are –

• Be working in a job that fulfills me and makes a difference to others
• Have made my health a priority and lost some weight so I can move better and hurt less
• JJ settled at University and happy in his studies
• My girls feeling prepared to undertake their GCSE exams

This first part above I started to write in the first week of January and now it is 22nd January and I am already some way towards achieving the first one as I got a new job last week. I’m going to be the Food Bank Project Manager in the town where I go to church and it needs a complete overhaul, so this will be an exciting (and slightly scary) challenge, but I feel equipped to do it as I know it is God who placed it in front of me.

Other items that I’d add to my visualisation of how I’d like December 2022 to look, include –

• Adam being in a job that challenges and fulfills him, one where he doesn’t feel exasperated most days
• Us all being settled in our home, feeling safe and comfortable
• The whole family continues to be a part of our church family, fully involved in many aspects of serving
• My girls having great friends, that they can rely on and trust. Ones who are good influences on them
• Family life at home being more collaborative, with everyone helping with the chores and cooking as I’ll be working more
• All of my family is well in both physical and mental health

And that’s it really. I don’t know if I’m just a simple woman or if I have low expectations but I am content with what I have in the main and I think that is a very precious gift. Thank you Jesus for all you give me and the way you are a constant in my life. I am so glad I have you to go through this life journey with. I honestly don’t know where I’d be if I didn’t have you to turn to and rely on every single day. Amen

4 bucket list ideas for 2022

Photo by Ian Schneider on Unsplash

{This is a collaborative post}

Another year has rolled around.

And while the previous two have been distinctly more… unique than those that came before them, the uncertainty for many has only renewed our desire to push ourselves that little bit further and expect more out of life.

So it’s no surprise that as New Year rolls around we’re more motivated than ever to cross a few items off our bucket lists and level up our ambitions when it comes to those annual resolutions. With that in mind, these are just four of the most common bucket list entries – how many are on yours?  

1. Renovate your home

Maybe your home is full of odd jobs that you’ve been putting off since the day you moved in. Or perhaps the DIY renovations you began in lockdown have fallen by the wayside, and still need that final push to finish them off.

Take it one room – or even one task – at a time. Draw up a list of priorities and work through them as and when you’re ready. Resolutions don’t have to be done all at once – turn it into a long-term and sustainable project, I'm certainly going to. The bathroom is the first on the hit-list as I need to clean up the grout, or maybe even dig it all out and re-grout it as it can make such a difference to how fresh the room looks. 

2009 - 2019 A decade in Photos

I kept seeing people doing the #10yearchallenge on social media, sharing a picture of themself and their immediate family in 2009 and then again for the end of the decade in 2019, and I really liked the idea of looking back and seeing what has happened in this decade. How have we aged?

I realised quite quickly though, that for me, most of my life-changing moments happened before 2009. By then I was already married (7 years), had owned three houses (since 1997) and was mum to a 6-year-old and 2-year-old twins. I was happily working part-time at the University of Herts in HR and had been there for around 5/6 years, and had completed my Masters in HR two year prior.

2009 proved to be an allusive year for a photo of the five of us, and I couldn't find any, so I'll start the photos in 2010, this one was taken in June, so it is just before the girls 3rd birthday and we were at a family wedding. It's not the best quality but you can see how young and fresh-faced dh and I look, and I love the joy on JJ's face. So funny to see him missing some teeth when he is now such a giant!

Marching into 2019 with Hope and Love

It's that time of year when so many people are thinking about what lies ahead for them in the next year. I really like this time, when it feels like you have a blank canvas ahead of you and whatever you do feels exciting and new. However for me, it is the keeping it going beyond the first couple of weeks, or even the whole of January (if I'm lucky) that is the tricky bit.

Years back I used to make resolutions, and then always felt bad when they went to pot, so I put that to bed and in December 2013 I published a list of expectations for the year ahead and looking back now, I like that. It was full of positivity and to be honest if I re-published the same list for 2019, I wouldn't go far wrong.

2014's list of expectations

2015 was supposed to be the year that I got #FitandFree, I used that hashtag for a while and the aim was to get fit and lose weight. Guess what?  It didn't happen.

At the beginning of 2016 I wrote about the goals I'd like to achieve that year, and with the exception of the big one that has been evading me forever (the weight loss) I did well.

It appears that I didn't write an end of year, or start of year post for 2017 but I remember this was the year I changed to having a guiding word. My choice of word was Trust and this was about trusting God and trusting myself. Then for 2018, I did the same and chose a word, this time it was Believe - I had to believe I could do it. What was the it?  Lose weight of course.

As I read over these old posts, it is very sad to see that my main goal at the end of every year is to be healthier and fitter, by losing weight and exercising more. It would be so easy to throw the towel in and say that I'm never going to do this, that experience shows I give up easily.

But I refuse to give up. 

In last years post, I said by the end of the year I would be far more healthier and lighter than I was starting the year. If I just look at that, then it would be a fail, but I've always maintained that you don't fail, you win or you learn in life and if I look into that post further, I see that I published a list of what I would believe in. It is when you read these that I know I won last year, I made great progress, yes my outside body still looks fat and my physical health isn't great but my spiritual health is so much better. I do believe I am worth it, I believe I'm loved and that I make a difference and I end the year already a gym member who is actually using her membership each week and knowing that in 2019 I will lose weight. I start slimming world on New Years Day.

Here is the list I published this time last year -

• I need to believe I am significant and worthy of good outcomes
• I need to believe I can make the right choices with food
• I need to believe that exercising is necessary and can be enjoyable
• I need to believe I will lose weight
• I need to believe I am loved
• I need to believe my actions make a difference
• I need to believe the best of others
• I need to believe I have the time to spend with God each day

Today a spent a good couple of hours in the prayer centre as I was trying to focus on what my mantra should be for 2019. Now I know some Christians don't like the word mantra, but I'm not getting hung up on this. A lady I follow on Instagram - Ysette Guevara has been talking about mantras recently, and her first one was 'to rest in the palm of God' and this spoke so loudly to me. So I've been asking God where my focus should be and how do I tune into Him more and keep moving forward.

The first mantra, or phrase that came to me was

"rest in Me child"

and I was feeling very positive with that and ready to move forward with it, as it spoke to me about getting rest, having quiet time with God, sleeping well, giving God the control and acknowledging I am a child who needs to be guided and is loved.

Then tonight I went to a couple of short workshops and the one on being free from fear really grabbed me and I came away, after doing the session in the dark with just the odd candle, believing that I have to step into the light, or live in the light, and then the words of the well-known song came to me

"marching in the light of love"

and this feels right for me too, as marching is doing and I need to be actively putting in to my exercise and weight loss journey, the light is God and I must rely on Him and He is love, so feeling supported and appreciated as I take these steps that have proved so difficult for over three decades!

So here I am right now, with two mantras and I don't know if that will work or naturally over the next few days as I pray and wait on God if one will make itself clear as my guide for the next year ahead. Whichever, it doesn't matter as I'm feeling positive and I know there is hope....

Why not pin this post for later?

Believe: My Guiding Word for 2018

Out of all the Christmas lights in Brighton on Boxing Day
this was the only one I wanted to take a photo of, I now know why!

I really love the idea of having a word for the year that guides you and keeps you focused on what you want to achieve. I've shared many times that I don't like resolutions as for me, they just end up dragging me down when I break them. I think having a focus word is a lot kinder and I am able to not beat myself up when I don't meet my own expectation of perfection, which of course is often.

Last years guiding word was Trust. I needed to trust more in the Lord and in myself that I could make changes and achieve the things I needed to. When I look back over the last year if I am using my critical eyes I'd say that nothing has changed, that I'm still in the same place as I was a year ago and most of that unloving assessment would come from the fact that I am still very overweight.

However what I have learnt over the last year is that I have far more value than the weight on the scales gives me. I am intrinsically valuable, just because. I don't have to be slim to be loved.

I've been on the Freedom in Christ course and that has been super helpful in making me put down lots of baggage around guilt and past actions. I've also done lots of work on feeling rejected and accepting that I am worth it.

I have my operation for my terrible periods coming up in 2 weeks and that is a big step forward. I also have my appointment for my orthotics to be fitted in a week and I pray that will start to help ease my foot and leg pain. With progress in both these health areas, my weight loss will become much more achievable.

Charity work that had run its course has been let go and I've started new voluntary work to replace it. I'm in a good place with my life generally and I really enjoy all the ways I get to serve my family, community and the Lord.

I need to look through my kind eyes and know there HAS been change and there HAS been progression and it is because I have been able to trust the Lord.

Trusting myself is the part I have found harder and after a lot of evaluation and introspection I have realised that I never achieve the weight loss because I don't truly believe I can. I'm not sure if this is connected to me believing I am worth it or just that I doubt my abilities.

Therefore my guiding word for 2018 is Believe.

I went through so many other words first and it wasn't a quick process to find the right one. Some of those considered were Peace, Change, Free, Fit, Wellness, Shine, Ready and Kind came a very close second. But in the end Believe won as you have to believe to achieve.

• I need to believe I am significant and worthy of good outcomes
• I need to believe I can make the right choices with food
• I need to believe that exercising is necessary and can be enjoyable
• I need to believe I will lose weight
• I need to believe I am loved
• I need to believe my actions make a difference
• I need to believe the best of others
• I need to believe I have the time to spend with God each day

"If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer." Matthew 21:22 

I am believing that at the end of 2018 I will be far more healthy and lighter than I am right now. That is my one goal for the year. To do this year what I have failed to do for the last two decades - lose weight so I can live a full and free life without being held back by my weight or the health issues it brings.

Lord, I believe that when I place my hand in yours and make an effort, I can do this. Thank you for sticking with me. Amen

Getting the New Year off to a good start

I feel like Christmas is a distant memory now and I'm happy the new year is here; there is still that feeling of expectation and new beginnings. Like anything can happen as it is a fresh canvas awaiting me to draw the picture of 2016.

To be honest I came into the new year without too much thought of what the year ahead would hold and what goals I should be thinking about. I'm really not into New Year's resolutions and I just assume they will be broken, so I stopped making them some years back but I do believe it's good to have a focus and change is the only constant.

Better Health 

Over the last couple of weeks I've spent quite a bit of time in prayer and quiet contemplation of what I should be doing this year and a few focus areas have made them self apparent to me. First off I really need to get a grip on my health. I've been on too many diets in the last thirty odd years since I started to try to lose some weight. The evidence from those last three decades tells me that diets do not work for me, I now realise what I need is small, gradual changes. So I am working on changes a couple of things each month and making them habits for life. It is going to be slow and I'm sure at times boring but it is so necessary and if I can establish all the better behaviours as my norms then the weight cannot fail to fall off and my health improve.

So what happens now then?

I was asked this question a couple of weeks ago and I think it is a very pertinent one and it has certainly been useful. I have found myself many times in the last few weeks pondering - what now?

The quick and simple answer is that I have no idea.  I do not know what the future holds or what I am supposed to be doing. All will be revealed in God's good timing and I must have patience to wait and see.

That is pretty frustrating though, as of course I want to make things happen, to change the world and to stop injustice. I want to jump on it and make it happen now, not tomorrow, not next month and certainly not in five years time. I see what others are doing and my actions feel inadequate but we are not supposed to compare ourselves to others, that helps no-one. We must just follow our own personal path.

I've mentioned many times that I do not like resolutions as I feel they are made to be broken but I do see the value in setting goals and having forward vision. To some extent it is difficult to set long-term goals as I truly want to be open to what God has in store for me and I don't want to be too busy off on a tangent that is not part of his plan.

May 2014 be a blessed New Year

Happy New Year friends, it has been a pleasure to journey 2013 with you.

I am sure this next year will be an eventful one and I have high hopes of what God will be up to in my life and yours.

I'm not big on resolutions as I just find they are made to be broken but I do like looking forward and vision, so here are my expectations for 2014 -

What are yours?

BTW - have you seen the new canvas colour function in Picmonkey, it allows you to create your own little graphics like mine above. I love it!

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#RealLifeRocks in 2013

I'm writing this on the evening on 27th December, so we have just four days left of 2012. I've looked back over the last three years on my blog and each year at this time, I say the same thing - that I won't set any resolutions and set myself up to fail. That does make sense but tonight I have been questioning whether I have not set any resolutions in recent years so that I do not have to actually keep to them. There are certain things that really do need to be tackled and I keep pussy footing and not grabbing the issue by the balls and dealing with it.

A couple of months ago I posted about my main focus for 2013, that being Operation #RealLifeRocks, I totally standby this and it is my overreaching aim of the year, to live in the now and to cherish what I have in front of me.

I do need some direction but I want to keep it positive and simple, so rather than a list of do-nots.  I'll share with you in pictures what I will be doing in 2013...

 

 

 

 

 

 

Most of these I look at and think yes that is achievable I can do that but when it comes to my weight I have a brain block, so I'll leave you with this simple thought and I have to admit it made me cry when I read it -

 'If you believe it .... you can achieve it'. 

I need to start believing...

Books image credit

I Heart Me! Wk 9 - Where am I with my Resolutions?

I am just back from Church and I had a really good night but I sat there thinking about how much I do not like the way I look right now.  I felt so self-conscious, which is crazy as I was in the safest place ever.  No one judges me there.....  well except my worst critic that is - me!

Once back home I turned twitter on and saw a tweet from Notes to Self, Plus Two and recalled that she had started a weekly link up based on loving yourself and remembering who you are.  I realised I needed to love myself a bit right now and thought I would join in this week.

The topic for this week, is around how you are doing with your new year resolutions. I hoped over to this post and had a look at what I had resolved to do this year and was a bit dismayed to see that I have completely ignored most of the good things I said I would do!  Oh dear...

I vowed to spend time with my kids and to enjoy each of them.  Thankfully I can put a tick against this one.

I resolved to re-start the date night that my husband and I used to enjoy. Whoops, not happened as yet.  OK date set for next Sunday night.  I need to try and feel a bit better about myself before then so that we can actually enjoy our night...  leading me on to the next point which I have also completely ignored.

To stop stuffing my face full of unnecessary food. I have attempted to work on this a number of times this year.  It is at the forefront of my mind every day.  Some days I choose to ignore this and other days I choose to try really hard and to give my will over to God. I wanted to beat myself up when I realised that I have not been achieving my targets but actually I have been trying, failing but trying but that is OK.  I am human and it is what happens sometimes.  If I give up before the miracle happens then I will lose out.  How many times did it take Edison to successfully create the electric lightbulb? 100's I believe, each one of them learning something for the time when he had the big win.  I often quote the phrase 'win or learn' to people, we never fail. I must take heed of my own words.

and the last thing I resolved was to ensure I was in bed by 11pm.  A mixed bag on this one, some nights (like last night) have been terrible and I have still been sat here tapping away at 1am.  Other nights (like tonight) I have turned off my PC and gone to bed.  Getting to bed at a decent hour and sleeping soundly makes such a difference to my attitude towards my children the next day.

I am very grateful to Notes for getting me thinking about this again.  In Church tonight I was praying about what I should do for Lent and I am pretty sure the answer is to do something around my food.  Not sure how radical I am supposed to go as yet though... I'll keep praying and see what comes to me.

What about you?  How are you doing with your resolutions?

2011 - What Does The Year Hold For Us?

Image Credit

Ella at Notes From Home has prompted me to think about my resolutions for the new year and I have to be honest, I do not normally bother!

I started to ponder why this was?  Is it because I am a cynic and just think there is no point as then you break them within a few days/ weeks?  or could it be because I do not really give myself enough quiet time and space to actually think about what might be important and what I need to focus on in the new year.  I have a sneaking feeling it is that latter option.  So I am taking some time now to ponder on 2011 and to wonder what the year might hold for my family and me.

I won't be making a big list of all the things that I must not do as that for me would just be depressing and dis motivating. Instead I will make a list of positive things that I intend to do, things that are good for my family and me and things that we enjoy but sadly can get pushed to the side with life's more boring and mundane tasks.  Last month I blogged about my priorities, I had a moment of clarity when I knew for sure I was supposed to be spending more time with my family and that is where my resolutions will start..

1. I will take time every single week to have quality alone time with each of my children.  Be it playing a game, snuggling and watching TV or going out together.  Just something for the two of us.
2. I will re-start date night for dh and I.  Sunday nights used to be full of romance and longing - I aim to bring that back again.
3. I will go to bed by 11pm at least 6 nights per week and I will not stay up blogging or on the PC for too long.  Life is more important that my blog!
4. I will look after myself and stop stuffing my face full of needless food each time I feel any kind of emotion. I need to reconnect with my recovery program and gain abstinence.  Reaching out to others in recovery on a regular basis
5. That is it, I will stay realistic in 2011 and know that if I can do all those things I will be a very happy lady!

It is a shame really that I was not making that big list of 'do nots', as I read the following resolution at a new blog I found today and it was just perfect for me, it was as if Helen was inside my own mind when she wrote this one -

• I resolve to take a deep breath and count to 10 BEFORE screaming/yelling like a banshee at my children. No matter what the provocation. Even if they have written over the walls / peed on the new sofa / sneaked a lemon drizzle cake into the teepee in their bedroom and scoffed half of it / flooded the bathroom floor (again).

OMG, she is me.  I often feel like a banshee.  I pray that we both find the strength to have more patience with our kids this year, however much they test us!

So that is me.  What about you? Do you do the whole resolution thing?

Wishing you a very Happy 2011.  I hope you will continue to read Mummy From The Heart... and please do pop over and see my new blog Honest Mummy Reviews & Recommendations... I appreciate each and every one of you. Mich xx