6 Great Slimming World Blogs to Encourage You

Some of this weeks yummy meals

Hey friends, it is week 2 on my Slimming World Journey and it has been a bit of an odd week. My usual weigh in day is Saturday and I should have been weighing today but I'm volunteering at the night shelter and then doing a first aid course so I couldn't go. This meant I had to weigh at the other class which is a Tuesday evening, rather than my Saturday first thing and I was a tad sad to see the scales said I'd put on a pound.

I'm not sure what made it say that but I had been being good and my perseverance will pay off, it can't not! So I am putting ti down to an evening as adverse to a morning weigh-in and that you can't really accurately judge anything after just 3 days. I have to weight in again this coming Tuesday as we are away next weekend so that will be a truer reading.

I'll be honest with you, I haven't found it massively easy to stay on track. Thee is just so much I enjoy and want to eat but I know I have made such progress, so it is good and I'll keep at it.

#1GoodThing a Day for Advent - Week Two, Sunday Round-up

Loads of fun last night, we enjoyed an international meal with our pastoral group. 8 nationalities sat around the table, this is my #1goodthing. We ate Korean sticky chicken, Spanish tortilla patatas, tomato chicken, Russian salad & bread. Followed by kurgizstan apple pie, Italian panacotta & raspberry coulis

A photo posted by Michelle Pannell (@michelletwinmum) on Dec 8, 2016 at 6:08am PST

Afternoon friends, I'm a little late with this today but I suspect no-one has noticed!

We are away at my husbands parents this weekend and this is the same area where we lived for fifteen years before moving to East Sussex, so it has been fabulous to catch up with some old friends and many of the kids Godparents. So nice to grab a decent cuppa in John Lewis this morning and catch up on their news, whilst the kids shared excitedly about what they had been up to as well.

In one weekend we have managed to see loads of people, not quite everyone but near enough. I had a great evening with my friend Kate who I've known since Uni and we did our usual of a take-away and some Saturday night TV as well as a look round her new gorgeous period cottage.

We also headed over to the Warner Brothers Studio Tour to see the making of Harry Potter. We have been there before and really enjoyed it but there have been lots of changes since we were last there with the addition of the Hogwarts Express train (so iconic) and the whole studio tour was decorated for their #HogwartsintheSnow feature with Christmas and snow displays.

It's been a great weekend to top off a fab week, which saw us enjoying a Christmas meal out with friends, having our pastoral group round to ours for a meal, where they cooked for us and we had food and people from eight nationalities around the table and we also had a good open afternoon at the girls school.

To Reveal or not to reveal? Things to think through... (New Bloggers Fortnight)

We have a rather lovely lady on the blog today,  I have always found Lou to be very approachable and real and we shared a few late night al fresco drinks after the MAD blog awards last year, so I know first hand she rocks. Lou writes at Bloggomy.

I am a Stay at Home Mum of 4 children. My children are 19, 12, 10 and the smallest is 14 months. My blog started as an online diary of my smallest child's life and has grown organically from there.  I was a runner up in the MAD Blog Awards Best Baby Category after blogging for just 6 months.  I am enjoying being a mature mum to my youngest son. Experience is a gift not a hindrance
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New to blogging or thinking of starting one? I have been blogging for 14 months now and I have learned quite a bit in that time. Here are a few things to think through about what you reveal on your blog and possible reasons why...

* Names and information about yourself, family or children..

With the web being a world wide stretching resource everything you write is there for the world to read. Once you hit publish its there for all intents the world to see and search. If like me, you have children with unusual names for instance, then just by searching a name in a search engine will list any content on your blog. If you don't want to use actual names then perhaps a nickname is an option? If you don't mind sharing and are happy then share, share, share but if you are a little apprehensive then perhaps think about what you want people to be able to search.

* Are you happy for your friends and neighbours (and strangers) to know everything about you?

For mainly the same reasons as above, mentioning school names, places and the contents of your underwear drawer will mean it is accessible in a search and although most people are just looking perhaps for advice it is also 'out there' for those not so innocent. Again think what YOU want people to know about you and if you don't want quite as much openness then you can blog anonymously. You don't have to put your name on your blog, Twitter or anywhere else unless YOU want to.

* Photos

Like the written word photos and images are also included in search engine searches, for instance Google Images. These will link back to the website or blog they are displayed on. If you include photos of yourself and children then these could be recognised even if you don't name them. There are a few, more diverse shall we say, people that search the internet so again you may want to think what photos you are happy for people to see. Again if you are apprehensive take photos that do not show faces or places but if you are happy with it all then hit that share button!

* Its there in black and white!

Well of course it is - its a blog you may think. Ever read a text message and thought you understood what the person meant but then when you spoke to them you had read it completely differently? This is the same for your blog posts. Remember that many readers to your blog have no history with you and do not know you in real life. No matter what we may like to think or how exact we think we are being, we all can take and read things differently to the way the writer had written them. What you thought was helpfully sharing tips on life based on your experience could be seen by others as preaching or you are trying to be superior in some way. You just share some helpful tips for getting a baby to sleep but others may read it that you are implying you are a guru or authority. Everyone is different and that's what makes the world so full of diversity!

* Having children from two relationships..

I chose not to share information on my previous marriage. Firstly I don't want to share something that then comes up in a search (see above points) and secondly my children can also find (and read) information I have written. Yes you may think your ex is a no good so and so and tell the world about how they did this or that when you were married but is that something you want your children to know? Still want to share the information? Cool go ahead or again chose the option to blog anonymously but make sure you are not sharing something that could only be from you!

* Linking your blog to your Facebook account...

Remember by sharing your blog on your personal Facebook account it is available for everybody on your friends list, and possibly even those outside of it. Check your Facebook security or account settings for just who can see what you put. There is an option for 'friends of friends' or 'public' to see your shared details and if you're happy post away or if not change the settings in your account to what you are happy for people to see. Perhaps separate your friends list into those you want to share with and those you'd rather not then when sharing a blog post just share with the selected list of people. You can also keep the two separate and not link your blog to Facebook at all if that's what you'd prefer.

* Blogging for therapy.


Sometimes putting thoughts into words can be extremely therapeutic. It can also give you a place to look back to and see how far along the path you have come since you wrote it. It can also support others in a similar situation.

Although many of the above points may seem negative points to blogging they are not. It is about you having a choice and control over your blog contents. As you get further along the line with your blog you may choose to review these points again and change anything you don't feel happy with but at the end of the day blogging is your space, your words and your rules so enjoy!

Thank you Lou, super stuff.  I think the big message here peeps is to think through what you are going to share.  I never did that, I just started a blog and then thought it through afterwards.  Originally my kids names were on here and once I went public I had to go through and change them all to the nicknames I now use.  I also recall the first time I published a school picture of JJ, so proud he was now a big boy and then someone pointed out to me that from the badge on his top I had just told the world where he was schooled - eek!  The my favourite boob though, was when I was a finalist last year in the MAD blog awards, I duly sent a press release to the local paper as advised and only once it was published did I think through that everyone who actually knows me locally could now link me to my blog.  Think first and press that publish key second.

Well, it is the penultimate post tomorrow and I have to be honest I sneaked in an established blogger.  I would call her one of the old bloggers but I know she hates the new/ old divide.  The lovely Nickie of Typecast fame will be here and shh don't tell anyone, she really is lovely. I know she likes her reputation as a bit of a scary one but it is all front. She is one of the most knowledgeable and giving bloggers that I know. Tomorrow she'll point you in the direction of some great tutorials to add a few bits and pieces to your blog.

Then on Wednesday I'll wind up the week with a few wise blogging words (ha, ha yes don't hold your breath for those) and a round-up of all the super posts we have had in the last couple of weeks.

You don't have to be everyones Best Friend to be a Blogging Success

Today on the blog we have Clare, she blogs at Seasider in the City and is one of the nicest bloggers that I have had the pleasure to meet. (I tried hard to think of a word better than 'nicest' as I know some people think nice is limp but that is not the case at all). Not only is Clare nice she is also feisty, opinionated and fun to be with, well that is what I think, here is what she says about herself -

Clare is the tangerine dreamer behind Seasider in the City, with an undying love of family, golf and food and on an eternal quest to lose weight and get fit with minimal effort. The best is yet to come…
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In many areas of my life I don’t quite fit the normal stereotype. For many years I was one of the few straight members of a women’s football team, at the golf club I am very competitive which is quite unheard of amongst the women, as an IT manager I am pretty ungeeky, and certainly don’t spend my free time talking techie (unlike the group I overheard in the pub on Friday), and in the office I wear jeans and no makeup (gasp).

All these things make it at times difficult to fit in, I am not welcomed with open arms, more eyed with suspicion.

I have found blogging to be along the same lines. I see posts on blogs and forums saying you must do ‘this’ and you should never do ‘that’ and I smile to myself thinking I do exactly the opposite of that, and so what?

There are times when not being part of the ‘in’ crowd hurts a little, you see conversations on twitter and when you try and join in you are not really made welcome, sometimes you may tweet asking for help, knowing that the people that can are online right now, and you are ignored. Other times there is just the frustrating thing of commenting on a post and the blogger replies to every single other reply but not yours! It’s hard but slowly I am toughening up, developing a thick skin in blogging as I have done in the rest of my life.

Just over a year ago, when I started to write, I so desperately wanted to fit in and be liked. I would do anything not to rock the boat and jumped through hoops to try and be popular. I look back on this time and feel ashamed. It wasn’t me, who was I trying to kid – it was like turning up to work with straight hair and a full face of make-up! I even deleted a review post I had written because there was a lot of negative talk about the brand – I had no issue with the brand and I really liked the product, I didn’t even contact the PR to apologise. I removed it, just in case someone thought badly of me. How shallow!

What have I done then? I have written what and when I wanted. I join in with linkies, I review quite a lot of products. I do care about statistics though, even if I am told I shouldn’t – I like to do things well. My blog has grown beyond belief and I am proud of this, it is something I have done.

Most importantly though I have made some really good friends, pinpointed some fellow bloggers that are happy to share both their opinions and their time. They are happy to give advice whether you are brand new or been around the block a few times. They keep my feet on the ground and are a voice of reason if I think people are being mean!

My advice – don’t try too hard (at least not for too long)! If you are new and want some friends come and find me and anyone else appearing in Michelle’s new blogger fortnight – obviously you have already found the fabulous lady in question and she is well worth a follow too ;-)

Thank you Clare for sharing so honestly, I read this post and felt a little tug at my heart, in 500 words Clare summed up my life.  I have never been THE one, the one everyone wanted to be friends with.  I was always on the outskirts of the 'in' crowd and trying to fit in, trying to make sure everyone liked me.  Then a few years ago I grew up and stopped trying so hard and since then I have been a much happier woman.  When I first came to blogging, like Clare I found it incredibly tough and wanted to rise to the heady height so blogging stardom (if there is such a thing! lol) and what I found was that when I was focused on the stats and how popular my blog was I was at my most unhappiest and not feeling in the slightest joyful at what was being achieved. Things started to get taken for granted, I got to number 2 in the Wikio (now ebuzzing) parenting blog chart - so what? I had over 20,000 page views and just over 10,000 unique visitors in a month - yeah and...? My Klout score reached about 65 and my self-esteem reached about 2!

When I stay true to the reasons I blog, I am happiest and then things really do fall into place.  Making friends like Clare = result! 11,000 page views in a day on my blog as I was helping @ChristineMosler and Save the Children with their #healthworkers campaign = phenomenal and passing on the blog love in New Bloggers Fortnight - yep that rocks!

Thanks for reading, stay true to yourself and let yourself shine.  We can not all be the best read blog out there but we can all be happy and enjoy what we have instead of hankering after more and more, which I promise you might not be that satisfying at all when you get it....  You know what they say, be careful what you wish for!

Late tomorrow on New Bloggers Fortnight I welcome the superb Ruth from Geek Mummy, I put some questions to her that new bloggers had asked me and she comes up tops with the answers.  Check back to find out about SEO, no-follow links and ranking metrics.

Things I wish I had known at the Beginning by Multiple Mummy (New Bloggers Fortnight)

If you are here looking for Reasons to be Cheerful, then head over to Seasider in the City and link up there, for this week the lovely Clare is the host.  Cheers Mich x
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We have a fellow twin mummy on the blog today. Kerry from Multiple Mummy has just had her first bloggerversary and has really established a lovely blog full of family fun and honest tales of being a stay at home mum. Make sure you stop by and visit her if she is a new blogger to you. Here is what she says about herself -

A family obsessed lady who turns the big 30 in April. Mummy to a three year old boy Noah and two year old twins Little Madam and Chilled Out Boy and I blog at Multiple Mummy which has just celebrated it's 1st birthday. I am currently a stay at home due to childcare costs (please don't get me on my soap box) and am a Science Teacher by Trade (I also co-write Science Sparks) a job I love with a passion and hope to return to one day. Blogging has become my new addiction, and has kept my sanity. I am a chocoholic, a twitteroholic and a babyoholic and hope to have more! I am also a total geek! I used to be geek chic, but the chic bit has fallen off since having children! I'm a real people person and love a chat so please come and say hello.
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We all start blogging for different reasons. For me, I stumbled into it, and then found it to be my release from the carnage that can be two-year-old twins and a three-year-old little boy. I never comprehended how much I would learn and how addictive it would become. I never began to imagine the passion that would grow and the love I would have for it.

I have been blogging now for 1 year (my blogaversary was the 31st January) and I have come to understand a lot of things over that year, including the so called blogging rules which I think Dorky Mum sums up perfectly, but there are some practical things that I really wish I had known in the beginning that would have helped and my blog kick off to a flying start:

Join things and take Part

There are a lot of places to sign up to, that will give you more information, hints and tips for blogging, but will additional help enhance your network of ‘friends’ and I promise you this, as strange as it seems, some people will become true friends and you will get opportunity to meet them.

Things to join or know about are BritMums, Tots100, Netmums parent blogger network, parent blogger network group on facebook and Love all blogs. It has taken me all year to find and join them, and I am constantly stumbling upon things on other blogs that I don’t have, or have not seen, so really take a look around of other blogs.

Link ups are a great way to read new blogs and also to help give you inspiration for those moments of writers block. Some popular ones are The Gallery; Saturday is Caption day and Reasons to be Cheerful. Plus I have just started one called Family Frolics (thought I would sneak that in) and they are all worth a look at. Again I did not start doing this until nearly two months in, and it is all helpful in the beginning to get yourself known a bit. Don’t feel you have to do them all, and they should never be a chore, but if you like that week’s theme and it fits in with your blog, then link up!

As a new blogger, you are lucky as you are so looked after and well supported nowadays. There is the Love All Blogs site which showcases posts every week and BritMums has created a feature for new blogs so getting yourself seen is much easier. Do take advantage of this.

Facebook page

I waited ages (well 10 months in fact) until I finally made a Facebook page and wish I had done this sooner. In some ways I can get more conversation flowing on there than on twitter and you can get a lot of traffic via Facebook.

It is funny because Mich from Mummy from the Heart said I had a successful Facebook page and she asked me what I did to make that happen. I am not really sure. I think I treat it like my personal page and add bits to my wall about my day, share photo’s and link my Instagram to it sometimes, and if I start to write a tweet that might generate discussion, I transfer it to Facebook first as that links to twitter anyway, and so I get chatter from both aspect.

I make the effort to reply on Facebook to those who commented on my posts and definitely some of my readers are greater Facebook users than Twitter.

I created a welcome page on my Facebook, which I think helped and if you look at the page you can make one for free to by clicking the link at the bottom.

When I went to Cybermummy last year one of the sessions made out that your page should be like a business and you should only post on there a maximum of three times a week. I have not found this to be the case. Readers (who are normal people) read us because they can relate to us, and so want that connection. We are not trying to sell them anything; we are just sharing our thoughts. I think Facebook and twitter make us real.

So for example last week when I just commented I was excited that ‘Call the midwife’ was on, I got lots of responses from people who were watching it to!

My view is…chat.

Share the love

Ensure you have share buttons on your blog as a widget so that people can tweet or stumble or G+ your blog and get in the habit of doing this to other people’s blog posts you enjoy! Additionally ensure you have a ‘subscribe by email’ widget is my other tip especially as GFC is being phased out.

Also if you really enjoyed someone’s post share it on your social network sites. They then may return the favour later on. Having a blog roll or blog love page is also a great way to share who you are reading.

If you want comments (which we all love if we are truly honest) then you need to comment as well! Bloggers tend to be very loyal and if they notice someone is commenting regularly they will head over to that blog and return the favour and you may find you end up with a new follower.

Time and schedule

Remember you do your blog for fun so try not to let it take over you life (this is easier said than done with the addiction part of it) but do try to find some sort of balance, or at least after six months work out what you want from it and where you want it to go. That way you know what is a realistic amount of time to spend. One thing that took me ages to realise was that I could schedule my posts and so before this I was staying up late or getting up early to publish when actually there is a function that does it for you. Great if you know you are going away and want to prepare something in advance.
So there we have it, my list of things to make blogging life easier! However linking back to Dorky Mum’s first post, these are only suggestions and guidelines as to what I have personally found useful and are by no means a set of rules. I hope you find them useful too. Please to take a moment to stop by and take a peak at my blog. I love getting to know new people and I am friendly soul so please can and chat to me!

MM  x

Many thanks Kerry, since I have renewed my interest in Facebook in the last 4 days and taken on board your tip to use it as I would my own page the people chatting about my blog page has risen by about 700%! I call that a result.

I have a lovely post for you tomorrow, one I can really relate to.  It is written by Clare from Seasider in the City and she shares why you can be a success at blogging but not be everyone's best friend.

Mummy, Mummy Mum on using Social Media (New Bloggers Fortnight)

Today's guest writer is a lovely woman that I have met a couple of times. I recall first meeting her last May at blog camp and I was in awe that such a new blogger had the guts to come along to a blogging event so soon in their journey.

Hello, I'm Emma and I blog at Mummy..Mummy..MUM!! I have 3 small children and love to write, chat and make things mostly while drinking coffee and eating cake.

I started my blog about 10 months ago and have had such a great year because of it. I've been given the opportunity to do some amazing things and met even more amazing people. I have absolutely loved my blogging journey so far.


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I am by no means a social media expert, but am a bit of an addict, so here is my rough guide to social media.

If I’m honest I started my blog because I thought I could make some money from advertising. I wrote some posts, sat back and waited, nothing happened.

It was only then that I googled ’mummy blogs’ and found ‘Sticky Fingers’ and ‘The Gallery’ prompt. Thanks to ‘The Gallery’ my blog had its first visitors. I can still remember getting that first e-mail to say someone had commented on my blog and how exciting it was. From that point I didn’t look back. I became a regular contributor to The Gallery and Silent Sunday. Through these I found many wonderful blogs and soon had regular visitors to mine.

Eventually I cottoned on to the fact that joining Twitter would be a good thing, and was soon spending most evenings engaged in twitter chats. Through twitter I have made many friends, some of whom I have met in real life. All have been amazingly supportive. Twitter can be a great place to just hang out. Like anything you have to put time in to get something out of it. It takes time to build relationships with people and build a following, but is absolutely worth it.

From a blog point of view Twitter is an invaluable tool for marketing your blog. It is such an easy platform to get your latest post out to potentially thousands of people, with little effort.

To find people to follow, I would pick a blogger you like and follow the people they follow to start with. After a while your audience just grows by itself.

Twitter can be a little overwhelming at first, but you just need to dive in and start chatting.

Top Twitter Tips

• Find like-minded people to follow.
• Use tweekdeck or hootsuite to manage lists or more than one twitter account.
• Be thick skinned – don’t worry if people don’t follow you back immediately, as long as you interact with people your followers will grow.
• Consider your twitter name, most people have a name linked to their blog, but that’s not always best especially when there are a lot of similar blog names around.
• If you read something you like, retweet it. Everyone likes to be be retweeted.
• Use Follow Friday, where people recommend people for others to follow using the #FF hashtag
• Put some time into it, like relationships in the real world, twitter relationships take time to grow. 

Pinterest

Pinterest is quite new to me, but I LOVE it. It’s basically a visual bookmarking tool. You have boards for different areas of interest and then you can ‘pin’ posts to the boards using an image from the post. Pinterest is a great way to not only keep track of posts you love, but to get your own posts out there for others to find and hopefully re-pin for you.

Again you just have to dive in there, add some boards and start pinning and following. Don't forget to add the 'pin it' button to your blog then people can easy pin your posts.

Facebook

Most people have a separate Facebook page for their blog. I found it quite hard to build up a following on facebook, but again it’s worth persevering with as its another great way to interact with followers.

The best thing to do is follow blogs and brands you like and interact with them, whilst ensuring your own posts and status’s are interesting and engaging.

Basically you only get out of social media networks what you put into them, the more you interact and share other's posts, the more your own will be shared. It is hugely time consuming, especially these days when there are so many different networks. I have only briefly touched on the main ones I use. Don't forget there is also Stumble Upon and Google Plus which seem to be growing in popularity.

I never did manage to monetize my blog very well, but the experiences and friends I have made along the way have most definitely made the journey worthwhile.


Many thanks Emma, one of these days I will get my bum in gear and head over for a look at Pinterest, I see so many people talking about it but for now I do not have the mental capacity to deal with anything else so Twitter and a renewed interest in Facebook will have to do for meNext up on new bloggers fortnight will be Kerry from Multiple Mummy and she will be sharing with you the things she wished she had known about at the start of her blogging journey.

Thanks for reading, catch you soon. Mich x

Reviewing with Integrity from Wendy (New Bloggers Fortnight)

Today's guest writer is Wendy, she is someone I met quite early in her blogging journey and one of the people who joined in with the original new bloggers fortnight last year.  At that point Wendy had been blogging for just about 4 months, now it is more like 16 months but I have to say that I think her her as one of the old hands.  She is a super nice lady who blogs honestly and extremely regularly, I have no idea where she gets the time. But as I value her input I cheekily asked her to squeeze in this guets post for me.

I'm Wendy from Inside the Wendy House, forty something mum of five amazing children aged between 2 and 24.  I've been there and done that through every stage of parenting and I've lived to tell the tale with a smile on my face. I've been blogging since October 2010 and have loved every minute of the adventure. I enjoy reviewing products with my team of Tiny Testers, and writing about my thoughts and feelings on life Inside the Wendy House!
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When I first began my blog back in October 2010, I had no expectations of what being a blogger would bring. I was aware of other bloggers out there who did a lot of reviewing, but I had no idea how they got involved in it, and never assumed it would be something that I would be a part of. However, very quickly I saw an opportunity to apply to become an ambassador for Graco. I thought I'd give it a go, so filled out my application form and was very excited to be picked as one of the lucky five people who would be given a Graco Symbio pushchair to try out. We had to promote the pushchair using social media and as someone who also enjoys entering creative competitions, I used those skills and enjoyed making fun videos, writing songs and poems and taking photos of the Symbio. I was chosen as the winner, and with the title of Graco Ambassador under my belt began my journey into reviewing. Since then I have become a John Crane Craniac, a Toys R Us Toyologist and a Quinny Caster through similar routes. As a stay at home mum, my blog helped me retain a sense of identity and working with brands gave me a sense of credibility and improved my self-confidence no end.

As my blog developed and my internet presence grew, I began to get approaches by PR companies and brands asking me if I would like to review products or services for them. I also saw companies asking for reviewers to contact them via Twitter or Facebook and contacted them directly. I was actually stunned by the way it all snowballed. With every review, I made sure I researched the product and company, wrote original copy and included photographs of the product in use and often included a video. It was time consuming, but I really enjoyed involving my children. I have hundreds of videos and photos of my 'Tiny Testers' playing with toys, helping me in the kitchen or enjoying a day out, thanks to reviewing. These are priceless mementos that have documented our life, and are a real bonus!

It was a real thrill receiving things through the post everyday. At first it was very difficult to say no to anything...it seemed rude not to accept an offer of a product! Consequently at times I was inundated with things and felt very bogged down. I always try to post a review within 2 weeks of receiving a product, so I put myself under a lot of pressure. Thankfully though, I learned to say no and realised that I was offering a valuable service to PR companies and could be choosier regarding who I worked with. I also realised that I didn't need to make a video for every single product I reviewed and consequently took some of the pressure off myself. However I still make sure that I write my own copy and include photos, after all, these reviews are going on my blog. I don't want it to be inundated with regurgitated press releases. I also try to keep a balance of review posts and personal posts.
I am very proud of the work that I have done. I love receiving positive feedback from brands regarding my reviews. I also think that blog reviews are a valuable resource for people Googling products before they make purchases, especially with expensive products such as nursery equipment. A real parent's honest opinion can be very influential!

Personally, I don't tend to make cold-call style approaches to companies myself (I'm a bit shy for that and am not good at being pushy!). I wait for opportunities to come to me. I have been incredibly lucky and have received loads of products including toys, pushchairs, clothing, food, kitchen equipment, cosmetics, toiletries, electrical goods and even a sofa! I've had lots of great family days out to zoos, theme parks and museums. I've enjoyed hotel stays, cookery courses and exhibitions. It is a real honour to be involved, but I do work very hard to ensure that I do a good job. Whether I'm reviewing a £600 pushchair or a £2.99 Valentine's Day card, I put in a lot of effort and make sure I 'do it with integrity'!

Thank you Wendy, I have every respect for you as a reviewer. You really do appear to do it with love and interest in each and every product and that was why I recommended you in my first BritMums roundup earlier this month.

So what do you think new bloggers - are you interested in reviewing products, hosting competitions and writing sponsored posts?  Yes, then do remember like Wendy says that it is hard work, an average review takes me anywhere between 45 minutes and 3 hours depending on the product and whether I am making a video or such.  Reviewing is not an easy way to get free goodies!

If you think it is for you then let me point you in the direction of some great resources -

BritMums roundup of all their recent posts about how to improve your blog.  This contains links to posts about how to write a review, creating a media kit, advice about working with brands and loads more.
The Tots100 blog is also a fabulous resource and recently they have had a series on blogging basics.
Then lastly you can check out the NetMums blog and their start a blog series.

Tomorrow, here on New Bloggers Fortnight, what have I got for you?  Well we have Emma from Mummy, Mummy, Mum (Isn't that an appropriate blog name?) talking about social media and how she uses it as part of her blogging journey.

Establishing Yourself in a Crowded Blogosphere: Mammasaurus

Hey all, we have a good one for you today.  It is Annie from Mammasaurus, the lady behind Love All Blogs.  Annie is a pretty new blogger herself but she has really established herself in a short time and I believe she blogs with a ferocity I have not seen in many bloggers.  I reckon she is a work hard, play hard kind of lady! Here is what she says -

RAWR I’m Mammasaurus, Evil Mastermind of Love Blogs MWHAHAHAAA! Actually I’m really Annie, mother of 8, wife of 1, lover of gin… I write stuff, I draw stuff. Sometimes it’s funny, sometimes it’s nonsense and on the odd occasion it’s sad and thought provoking – but if I had to sum it up in word that word would be ‘eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!’. Make of that what you will.

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Starting a blog is a bit of a learning curve, you spend the first few weeks trying to make it look lovely and learning all about posts and pages and learning the lingo (hands up who else sat and thought ‘what the dickens is a meme?’ ) ?!

It’ll soon become apparent that this new world of blogging that you have stumbled in to is big, really big, in fact forget big - it’s HUGE! You may start to feel a bit dejected when you work hard on your posts, writing stuff you feel proud of but feel like you aren’t getting noticed. So just how do you cement yourself in to Blogland? Here’s my advice…

Join in. Join networks and read other peoples blogs – this is the single most effective way to show people who you are. As a newer blogger you soon become aware of the ‘big names’ in Blogland, the established bloggers who it will seem that everyone knows. There are however thousands of bloggers and so it can feel a bit daunting when you first set out.

My advice is to find newer bloggers like yourself through networks or even just tweeting out ‘any other newer bloggers out there ?!’. Read these fellow newer bloggers blogs and comment if you can. People tend to visit a commenter's blog back to comment and over time you will find you have a handful of firm favourites. Keep up the commenting, chat on Twitter and you will soon start to form your own little ‘circle’ of friends. This is the first real step into feeling part of the blogging community.

Join in with memes, blog hops or anything that you can try and join in and link up to. Be sure to visit some of the other blogs who take part in these as you’ll be writing about similar things but there’s usually a big variety of interpretation amongst the posts which makes for great reading.

Don’t be afraid to try something new. If you have an idea for a meme, challenge or blog hop of your own, no matter how daft it seems, act on it! There are so many good ideas ‘out there’ that not every new idea will take off – but if you don’t try you won’t know! If you need advice or help with an idea you have don’t be afraid to ask some of the more established bloggers – they are usually flattered to be asked for help!

Create your own identity. No need to wear a Super-hero cloak or put your pants on your head, just discover who you are and what you love to write about and build on that. Some bloggers become known for being funny, writing reviews, promoting breastfeeding, taking amazing photographs, charity work and so on. Find what you enjoy blogging about and work from there.

Be nice. You’ll never agree with everyone on everything but it’s important to remember that people’s blogs are personal to them and there are emotions attached to them. If you read something that you strongly disagree with then by all means explain your point of view but do so in the nicest way possible as it’s easy to misunderstand comments sometimes and take offence.

Remember these things take time. No one comes in to blogging and is an overnight blogging mega-star! Becoming established takes time and can be jolly hard work. Over time the things your write about, how you participate and communicate with others and how you approach situations can gain you respect from other bloggers. The established most ‘well known’ names in blogging are where they are through a combination of talent, passion and sheer hard work.

Don’t give up! Sometimes you’ll find you go through a spell when it seems no one is visiting your blog and commenting and this is why it’s important to find something you love to write about because if you enjoy blogging it can carry you through any lulls – and we all have lulls.

And finally enjoy it!

Thank you Mammasaurus, I am sure so many people will be interested to read how you managed to take the parenting blogworld by storm in such a short amount of time. Before you go, I have just a few questions you could answer for us all.....  pretty please....

*  How did you find out about blogging and what made you start?
A friend of mine blogs for a large Mums Network over in Australia and it was reading her funny posts that encouraged me to get in to blogging and so one day, completely on a whim I set up a Wordpress blog - and the rest is history.

*  Did Mammsaurus start out how it is now, or has it changed over time?
When Mammasaurus started out it was very much focused on the funny things that my children did. Over the past few months it's morphed into a blog about...well...I don't know! And I think it's the not knowing what I am actually doing that makes me love it so much!

*  You mention about the big name bloggers, what strategy did you take with them? Did you actively engage with them or choose to focus on the newer bloggers like yourself?
Initially I was scared stiff to even try and engage with the big name bloggers! My biggest support in the first few months was from other newer bloggers. Back in the first couple of months I hosted a 'Look! A Book!' week to try to reach out to other bloggers - it was all newer bloggers who joined in. The first person to offer to join in was Actually Mummy who remains my closest blogging buddy to this day!

*  At a guess, how many blogs would you say you comment on each week? and how many of those are new blogs to you?
Cor blimey that's a question and a half ! Quite a lot, on an average week anywhere between 50 -150 blogs, with about 10 being 'new to me' blogs. I always used to be sure to read every blog entered in to Love New Blogs but with Love All Blogs having over 300 entries every week I am finding it hard to get round them all any more - but I do try!

I once told a close blogging buddy to try reading as many blogs as she could and comment if she found she was engaged - within 2 weeks she saw a dramatic rise in her own blog stats.

*  Did you have a plan in the beginning for the Love new blogs series, which of course developed into Love all Blogs?
There was no 'masterplan' and it's been a really organic process. A couple of weeks after Love New Blogs began I found that I was receiving a few emails each week asking if I had a similar site for non-parent bloggers (as Love New Blogs was aimed at newer parent bloggers). Then I met Diary of a Dad at BlogCamp and it became apparent that dads were being a bit under-represented as the main parent blogger networks do welcome dads but their Network names are very much 'Mum' orientated - Love Dad Blogs followed and then before long there was Love Craft, Love Cookery and Love Photo Blogs and eventually morphed into Love All Blogs.

*  What are your personal objectives for blogging in 2012?
I aim to keep blogging and focus on Love All Blogs as a priority in the short term until I have it running as smoothly as I can, I am working on some really rather nerdy things that will revolutionise the site at the moment which I find really exciting (yes I know - I am sad!)

I want to Support Black Dog Tribe more throughout the year ahead, mental health issues are personal to me and so we 'click' and I feel that I can really relate to what they hope to achieve. I've looked for a charity to support for the past few months and I wanted to find a Charity that isn't yet represented much within blogging circles. There are some wonderful Charities that are greatly supported by many bloggers - I'd personally like to see more smaller charities supported by different bloggers rather than dozens of bloggers supporting just one or two as I am now realising that the exposure can make such a big difference to them.

I'd love to speak at an event at some point. Any event, I'm not fussy though sadly I have no idea what about - I have no real 'experience' or 'skills' to share but I do think I could really inject some enthusiasm and motivation into anyone who blogs if I could sit them down for 15 minutes!

*  Do you check out your stats? and if yes, do you have an aspirational level that you would like to reach for page views/ uniques/ followers or whatever your favourite measure is?
Oh I used to check them - every day and it was a big deal for me! I know we all say 'it's not about the stats' but I think for many they do play a big part! These days I tend to check every other week and if I see I am about to reach a 'milestone' then I get excited - I reached 50,000 visits last week and I did celebrate with a G&T silently! I don't have an aspirational level that I'd like to get to though, I'm just going to keep on blogging and see what happens!

So, did you learn something new about the lady behind the RAWR?  I always find it so interesting to find out what makes other people tick.  Thanks Annie for a super insight. What have I got for you tomorrow I hear you cry?  Well New Bloggers Fortnight is on a one day holiday.  Tomorrow I have a couple of things I need to post up on the blog and then we will be back in the swing of things on Monday and I will be super pleased to welcome Wendy from Inside the Wendy House onto the blog. She will be talking about her success working with brands, reviewing, running giveaways and the like.

Anonymous Blogging by The Boy and Me (New Bloggers Fortnight)

As a blogger who is so 'out there' I am always intrigued by and slightly in awe of bloggers who manage to keep themselves anon. I have been chatting to today's guest blogger for about a year now and feel as if I know her, so it is funny to think that most other bloggers and tweeters won't even know her real name but we know her heart and that is enough..... she is a good 'un!

TheBoyandMe is an anonymous blogger who writes at http://www.theboyandme.co.uk/. She writes about family life as mum to The Boy (aged two and a half) and wife to Mr. TheBoyandMe (aged ‘old enough to know better’), as well as working part-time as a primary school teacher.


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The lovely blog-host has asked me to write about why I blog anonymously, and the pros and cons of this. To do so, I need to explain the background to the start of my blog.

I joined twitter in early 2010 but it wasn’t until September 2010 that I began to understand the point of it all. Until then I had been following celebrities and used to moan to my husband when they didn’t tweet back. By chance one day, I decided to search on the term ‘mums’ and came up with one or two people who I still tweet with daily. Those people introduced me properly to the wonderful world of twitter, and the sideline activity of ‘blogging’.

Before twitter I had never really understood what blogging was about, I even remember telling one of the mums in my toddler group that I thought it was a little egotistical to expect people to want to read about your daily life. And how wrong I was to say such a thing! The people I have met through blogging have been kind, warm-hearted, humble and honest. They share stories about their lives which are compelling and endearing. I have learnt a plethora of things from parenting to new technology skills, all because of the wonders of other people’s thoughts. For someone who is a SAHM or WAHM, then it can open up a gateway of communication to an otherwise lonely world.

It was because of those two aforementioned ladies that I had the confidence to blog a few thoughts that were in my mind. I was convinced that no-one would read my posts, and for someone suffering with low self-esteem, that would have been (in the words of DJ Loose) a ‘disaster’. However, and fortunately for me, some people did read my witterings and encouraged me to write more.

I should mention at this point that my original twitter name was my real name, and it was only when I contemplated blogging that I decided to change it. I am a primary school teacher in a small-medium sized town, which happens to be my hometown. My husband often jokes that I’m the most famous person he knows, because when we go out I will always see someone that I know. With that in mind, I wanted to ensure that no-one I knew, especially my boss, could find me easily. Within a month, I had also changed my twitter profile to private.

One of the first steps in blogging was choosing my blog name. I deliberated over this long and hard, and through various (twitter) conversations came to the conclusion that my blog name had to be the same as my twitter name to provide continuity. A male tweeter also suggested that I avoid the use of the term ‘mum’ or ‘mummy’ as it became confusing for the lesser species when trying to determine who was who. And so, on 5th December 2010, TheBoyandMe was born!

The one thing that was constantly at the back of my mind when I started my blog was that anyone could see it. Whatever I published on my blog would be there for any Internet user in the entire world to stumble upon at any point.

That is the one thing that still reigns supreme before I press ‘publish’. I am one of those bloggers who will argue that while bloggers may say they blog for themself, the minute they press publish, they want other people to read it. Otherwise, they’d keep a private diary wouldn’t they?

I remember that, whenever I think about typing a post-up. Do I really want Bob Smith in Australia to know that about my son? Will my son appreciate that I wrote about his embarrassment in ten years’ time? In twenty years’ time when his university friends see it? It’s funny to me now, but this is his life too.

While my blog is littered with photographs of my son, and occasionally my husband, you will be hard pushed to find one of me that’s been taken within the last twenty years. There is one, but it’s intentionally blurred and you’d have to know it was me to, well know it was me. I do this to help protect our identity: a lot more people know my face than know The Boy’s. If they see a photograph of me, then it’s obvious it’s my blog. Just another blog with just another toddler on it? Could be anyone.

You also won’t find our names anywhere in association with my blog. One reason is because I have an uncommon surname, and likewise the spelling of my first name. Staying anonymous makes it more difficult to find me.

My biggest hurdle with anonymous blogging is attending events. I’ve been to one or two very small events with bloggers that I trusted (and who have since become real-life friends) and they have completely respected my decision. They haven’t posted pictures of me, or used my name. However, when you attend an event with over thirty bloggers, some of whom you’ve never chatted to before, then the anxiety creeps in about your anonymity.

And that is my only negative to anonymous blogging: if you want to find friends, real-life friends through it, at some point you have to let them in. You have to remove The Stig helmet and let them discover who you are:

Just another mum!

Thank you lovely, a really good insight to why you choose to blog anon. Don't forget to pop over and see The Boy and Me and share some blogger love.  You ready for tomorrow?  We have the awesome Mammasaurus on the blog.  She'll be sharing how she took the parenting blog world by storm (my words, not hers! lol) and I have asked her to answer a few burning questions too.  Tune in tomorrow morning for that...

#R2BC - Wk 6 Pick of the New Parenting Bloggers

Happy Thursday. 
How are you all feeling today?  I am feeling good and really looking forward to my pilates lesson this morning and then I am seeing a friend for a spot of lunch and I am not back to work until 20th Feb.  How cool is that?   Super lucky me.  Now, if only the snow will stay away so that my Mum can come up and stay that will be just perfect!

Well, you have probably seen that New Bloggers Fortnight is in full swing now.  We have already had great posts from DorkyMum and Actually Mummy and there are about another 10 posts lined up for your enjoyment but for today....

We have the pick of the new parenting bloggers.  Last year I posted a couple of times with my predictions of the new parenting bloggers that I thought were worth a nosey round. I just revisited those 2 posts and I was pleased to see I did good, most of the bloggers I mentioned have gone from strength to strength and are still blogging now.

Now without further ado here is this years list....

Just Another Muther - who drew me in with a post about sex after babies.  We know how I love a bit of honesty.

From Slummy to Yummy Mummy - I was nearly put off by the name of the blog as I hate all the slummy/ yummy terms but actually I really enjoyed her post about the mousewife.

Adventures of a middle aged matron - if you have missed this blog so far, then you have missed a treat, this journalist has the gift and not only that she seems really human!

In a different voice - is a blog written by a twin mummy (there had to be one in here, didn't there!) and she has had a rather successful couple of weeks blog wise after writing a post about gender stereotyping bicycles.

Three years, one stone and then home - I have been over to this blog quite a few times now and I think you can tell a great blog when you have no idea it is new.

Mums the Word - another blog that really engaged me from the word go!  An all round good read with a great dash of humour.

and lastly a recommendation from Helen at Actually Mummy. The mad ramblings of Mrs Aspinall is an honest and fun blog.  I really enjoyed her post about her 70 something parents - love is alive at any age!

So now over to you all.  Write your cheery posts and link them up. If you feel like sharing some blog love then recommend a new blogger as well as sharing your reasons.  Link up and leave me some comment love.  I'll be doing the rounds this weekend and coming to visit you all.

Oh and don't forget to tweet too, we use #R2BC.

Enjoy the weekend! Mich x

Ohh and before you go....  I just remembered I am supposed to tell you that next week #R2BC will be over at Seasider in the City.  Clare is one of the founder members of #R2BC and she has posted as many posts as I have.  We have both missed one in the 58 weeks of posting so far.  So please make sure you join in next week and show Clare some blogger love.  She is one of the nicest bloggers I know and has become a great friend. I will be posting, but I'll use my review blog as things are a bit busy here with New Bloggers Fortnight.

Blogging Is Just Like The Real World

Image Credit

Just recently I have seen many comments and some posts pop up around the subject of some established bloggers not being very friendly or bloggers being in cliques and groups of friends that they cannot penetrate. There seems to be a trend that each January and February this happens and roll back a few years, I was the newbie wondering what on earth I was up to in this big scary blogsphere.

But I'll share with you what I have discovered in the last few years, in the hope that it might help you put your mind at rest and to relax and enjoy blogging and social media.  For it should be enjoyed, it is not a life or death matter it is just a hobby (whoops, I'll have offended a ton of serious bloggers there!).

So here is my opinion on the whole parenting blogsphere is cliquey business. So what?  Life is life, it is rich because people are so different and because we all communicate and act in completely different ways.  I really do believe that life would be boring if everyone was the same.  The beauty of a group of friends is that you are all unique and bring something special and differnet to the group collective. Blogging relationships mirror real life ones.  Simple really.

At any point when you are the new person, so in adult life that could be new job, new school for your kids, new evening class, new park that you visit, new toddler group and so forth you will probably feel a bit vulnerable and alone.  But what do we do in most everyday life situations? We smile at people, we say hi, we strike up a conversation, we look for a similarity that we can use and lets be honest we make judgement calls - is she my kind of person? You look at her clothes and the group of friends she is chatting to, how boisterous her kids are and you decide if you will make the effort to chat to that person.  Again blogging mirrors real life, do you like their tone on twitter, is their blog design nice, do they do too many reviews?

Yes there are some superb circles of friends in the parenting blogsphere and some of them use media like twitter to chat and many of their conversations look as if they know stuff about each other that no-one else knows and their tweets are full of innuendo that you and me do not get but so what?  They may have years of history together and have shared things we could never hope to understand - bereavement, divorce, parenting issues, all sorts and we know that this draws friends close and creates special bonds. Ones we cannot hope to penetrate in a week or even a month. However, that does not mean they are exclusive with each other.  If people choose to follow you on something like twitter it means they want to engage with you. So go ahead and say hi, but into a conversation, especially if it just looks as if it is general opinion and persevere. Keep chatting to people.

Please do not go on twitter and sit there feeling lonely.  I have done that many times and it does not feel nice. Why torture yourself?  Make sure you follow at least 100 people and tweet multiple people in one sitting, soon you will be having a chat with a few people.  Yes it might be all fluff and no substance but you are building new friendships here - baby steps.  Remember in the playground we may smile for a couple of weeks before we venture a hello.  Social media will be the same, unless of course you are one of those super dynamic people who storm in and establish yourself in a week.  Not many of those about and certainly not me.

I'll let you in on another secret, it is not just established bloggers who have circles of friends.  Last January loads of new bloggers came onto the parenting blogging scene and within a couple of weeks there were at least two groups that I knew of who had established firm friendships and tweeted each other as a collective group, therefore perhaps looking cliquey to the naked eye. They started blogging at the same time, had things in common, had kids at the same stage and chatted loads. So what did I do, as a blogger who has no particular circle?  I butted in every now and then, I commented on their blogs and I was friendly and helpful.  I now call those two circles of friends my friends too but that does not mean I am always involved in their tweets as I go on twitter far less than many people, so I sit on the outskirts and I watch and listen and then chat sometimes but I have made a wonderful range of friends who I can trust and call on. I just do not speak to them everyday....

So what I say to any newbie who feels a bit out of their depth at the moment is to keep with it and remember that many of the cliques that you perceive are in your mind. Just because people have a group of close friends does not mean that they don't want to make some new friends too. I truly know this from experience. I have met and shared time with loads of great bloggers, I have one super fab one coming to stay soon, I am excited to be sharing a room with a couple for BritMums and there are some new friends I have been chatting to online who I will be really excited to meet for the first time in the summer. Blogging can result in some awesome real life friendships but it does take time and work.

Listography: Top 5 Blogging Tips

When I saw this weeks listography over at Kate's I knew I had to take part.  I consider myself to be a friendly, approacable blogger and one of my favourite things is passing on the knowlegde I have gained in the last 3 years of blogging. I have been through such a massive rollercoaster ride on this blogging journey that it feels only fair to offer my services where I can to newer bloggers.  Hence New Bloggers Fortnight coming up in just a couple of weeks....  keep your eyes peeled.

So what are my top tips for blogging?

1.  Have confidence.
It is your blog, write it how you like.  Really think about why you are blogging and remember that.  If your blog starts out as therapy and a place to rant and that is why you continue, then remember that and do not get distracted by number of comments and stats or if your blog is primarily a place for you to make friends, then go out there and comment on other blogs and make friends - attract them back to your blog with your friendly personality.

2. Persevere
Blogging can be a massively emotional journey.  Most bloggers I know have shed tears at some point and it can be over many things; the emotions it brings up for you, the mean person who talks about you on twitter, or your lack of visitors.  But stay focused, if blogging is working for you on most levels then ignore the bad and keep going. At some point it will all come good and you will reach a place of serenity.....  it just takes time!

3.  Blog from the heart
You have probably noticed what my blog is called.  I tend to be known as a pretty honest blogger.  I reveal mostly all about my self (not others) and am happy to do so.  It helps me and I know from the emails, comments and tweets that I get that it helps others too.  That works for me.  Blogging from the heart does not mean you have to be as open as I am, it just means that what ever you write should be written with passion and care.  Do not try to imitate others, it is not flattery, it just will mean your blog will fall flat on its face.

4. Don't be afraid to ask
If you want something, go out there and get out.  Need to know how to put that widget on your blog? Want to know how to use twitter?  Would like to be tagged to join in with that popular meme? Would like to write a guest post for someone?  Ask, just be bold and be polite and ask for help. There are some wonderful places where you can ask for help like BritMums, Blogger.Ed, Love All Blogs and Twitter or just find your favourite blogger and use their contact page.

5. Make Twitter your friend
I had a love/ hate relationship with twitter for months when I first joint. In fact it took me about 5 months to feel like I could spend an enjoyable hour on there. The best thing I did my shed my inhibitions; I learnt that on twitter you have to just dive in.  No-one thinks you rude if you just jump into a conversation, the quicker you learn this the better.  You will start to have banter, fun and conversations with all sorts of people.  Follow 1 or 2 bloggers you have found you like and then look at their follower list and just start following people that you think look interesting.  You are going to need to follow around 100 people to ensure that enough is going on in your timeline to give you variety and something you fancy joining in with.

Last year I wrote a longer post wth tips for bloggers, take a look here if you fancy reading and if you are a new blogger you might be interested in the post I published a couple of days ago called How to get the most out of meme's, linky's and blog hop's.

As I mentioned at the beginning of this post I am hosting New Bloggers Fortnight for the 2 weeks commencing 6th February.  This is where new (ish) bloggers write posts for new bloggers with the aim of helping them find their feet quickly and with the least amount of pain! If there are any particular topics or questions you would like to see posts on then do leave me a comment and I will see what I can do.

Now head over to Kate's and check out all the other entires in this weeks Listogrpahy linky.

Cheers for reading, Mich x

#R2BC Year 2, Week 2 Celebrating Hidden Gems

<center> <a href="http://mdplife.blogspot.com/search/label/reasons%20to%20be%20cheerful"><img width="150" alt="Reasons to be Cheerful at Mummy from the Heart" src="http://i902.photobucket.com/albums/ac230/RebaMc/reasonstobecheerfulv2-1.jpg" height="150" /></a></center>
Hello all,

Giveaway fever is still running high here at the MFTH... house.  Practically each day I am securing another new fabulous prize for you to win. I am up to 20 prizes now and I tell you I would certainly like to win some of them, shame I can't enter! By linking up with this week post or next week (or both = 2 entries) you will automatically go into the draw. Check out HERE to find out more information about the giveaway and next Thursday I will post the full list with photos of all the prizes you can win.

Don't forgot to tweet about the giveaway inserting @michelletwinmum and #R2BC if you want an additonal entry to the draw.

For this week, I am sharing with you a few hidden gems. These are bloggers that link up with #R2BC but I do not think are that 'out there' and I am sure they would love a few extra visits.  So go and see them and share some blogger love.

First up is Julie who blogs at  Party of 5 - My Life and Kids.  This is a beautiful blog, full of real family time. I love this, which is featured in the sidebar -

In our house:

We do REAL

We do MISTAKES

We do I'M SORRY

We do SECOND CHANCES

We do FUN
We do HUGS
We do FORGIVENESS
We do REALLY LOUD
We do FAMILY
We do LOVE

Next we have Ems, blogging over the seas at A matter of choice. She had to win the award for the best #R2BC post last week. I love going to visit Em as she has had a tough end to 2011 but stays strong and positive in spite of the adversity. She is an inspiration to us all.

Then lastly for my recommended gems this week is Fay, over at Glass Half Full. She is another true ambassador for Reasons to be Cheerful, I think the name of her blog gives that away. I met (virtually) Fay last year when she was recovering after an operation and she has inspired me ever since.... You rock Fay!

So over to you, I look forward to coming and visiting you.  Write a post and link up and please, pretty please go and visit a load of the other people who link up. Blog hops work best when we do all share the comment love. 

Cheers Mich x

I Want To Get Off... A Tale of PND & Plea for Help!

Yesterday I read a post over at Mammasaurus about her experience with postnatal depression and this made me realise I have never blogged my own short journey through late-onset PND and I thought it was high time I did so.

Especially when she pointed me over to Boo and Me's blog.  Mummy Boo has been busy organising a raffle over the last couple of months and she is aiming to raise money for the Joanne (Joe) Bingley Memorial Foundation.   This is not a charity I have heard of before but having read about it, it is one I would love to help.  At the moment we are in a negative cash state so I can not offer money, but what can I do?  I can blog and help Mummy Boo to promote her raffle and to raise money for this superb new charity.

Let me briefly explain that Joe committed suicide in April 2010, just 10 weeks after the birth of her baby. She had been suffering from severe postnatal depression and her husband Chris started the charity to help raise awareness and to provide information about this illness which effects at least 15% of all new mothers every year.What I did not know is that it also effects about 10% of all new fathers too.

So what do you need to do now?
Head over here and buy a raffle ticket, they are £1 each or buy lots of raffle tickets if you have some spare cash.  The money is all going to the foundation, the prizes have been donated. Click the big red DONATE button, do not add gift aid please (you can't with a raffle). You can win all sorts, a gorgeous Pink Lining Bag, a pregnancy gift box, a Cath Kidson blanket and on and on.  I believe the prizes total around £800  but let's be honest you won't be doing this for the prizes, they are just the icing.

No money? You CAN help anyway?
Chris Bingley has started a petition that he hopes will gain enough signatures for it to be discussed in Parliament. Wouldn't it be great if we could help this along and add a few more hundred signatures?  Currently it sits at 517 signatures.  Head over now and sign, so that  the Government have to ensure that our NHS take care of new mothers.

And now the not so important bit, my story of PND....

In May 2008 I wrote a post on a Babycentre chat board entitled 'I want to get off'.  This was the start of me admitting there was a problem and I was not coping, it was one of the best things I ever did.  Speaking up when you feel there is something wrong is so important.  Trust your gut.

My twins were born in July 2007 and all I ever heard was how amazing I was dealing with new twins and a pre-schooler as well as my usual volunteering at Church and such. 'You are always so calm and everyone is so well presented, I have no idea how you do it Michelle', that was the type of thing I heard and for some reason it became very important to me to keep up that image of being able to cope and of doing a good job. I think the fact of not being at work played some part in this for me, parenting was what was defining me at that point and therefore I had to succeed at it. Succeed at any cost, even my health.

Between July 2007 and May 2008 the pressure built and I found myself feeling more and more unlike me.  It was hard to put a finger on what was wrong but I became angry and showed a real lack of patience especially towards JJ.  I recall crying to my Mum saying that maybe I did not love JJ anymore as all I ever did was shout at him and that he made me so mad. It broke my heart to think that perhaps my firstborn had been pushed out of my love and that my heart was not big enough for all three of my kids.

I recall smashing the sofa with my fists and screaming as I had to let the aggression and anger out.  I was like a pent up bomb waiting to explode. The outbursts were not that often but those I had were certainly not something a 4 year old boy should have been seeing.  How he must of felt, I have no idea?  I still have a list that I typed up to take to the doctors to show them how I was feeling.  My over ridding feeling was that I felt everyone wanted a piece of me and that the merry go round had to stop, as I just wanted to get off  and sleep but it never seemed to stop and I just went round and round and no solutions or rest came.

I was lucky that I was listened to when I went to the doctors, I sat there and cried and told her I could not cope and made her promise she would not take my babies away from me.  I just needed Miss M to stop screaming so much and to sleep and for JJ to behave and stop being so jealous.  I did one of those questionnaires which showed I did have depression and I was prescribed some anti-depressants.  A prescription I never fulfilled, I decided to try a softer option first and what I did was start to talk, talk to anyone and everyone about how I felt and why I felt the way I did and what help I needed.  Most people had no idea that PND could strike when your babies were 10 months old.  The opinion seemed to be that PND came straight on after having your baby and of course it does for some people but we are all different and since then I have learned that many parents of multiples suffer late-onset of PND, those first few months are so busy that you just whizz through them on adrenaline.

Over the next two or three months I regularly chatted to my Mum, husband and friends about how I felt and yes I am sure they were bored silly by keep hearing how hard it all was but it worked.  I started to feel more like me again and I got an evening job so I could escape the kids for short periods of time. Dh helped out more and realised just how much I was struggling and things picked up.  By November 2008 I was restarting back in my proper job, JJ was at school full time and the girls settled into nursery on my work days.  I learnt about balance and not having a spotless house, I took time to read and relax and my life improved significantly and I was pleased to say I now know the symptoms of when life is getting me down and I know the actions I have to take to stop myself getting to the stage I was at in May 2008.

I sincerely urge you to speak up if you feel out of sorts, if something is just not right or you feel different.  Tell someone.  They may not know what to do with the information but just the act of getting it out there could be a massive help to you.

For me, the following were my symptoms of PND, this is the list I wrote back in May 2008.  I just thought I would share it in the hope it may help someone else....

• I feel so tired much of the time, as if I can just sleep and often I feel dozy and spaced out, especially when having to concentrate (driving or PC)
• Everything feels like so much effort and I stress and worry about doing things, instead of just doing them

• I am being destructive with my eating and just having what I like and remembering I need to be good and then eating a packet of biscuits in spite of that

• I feel so anxious much of the time

• I worry how long the babies will sleep and the worry stops me using the time productively and doing anything with it!

• Money is a real worry to me. I know I should not spend it but I do to try and make myself feel happy/ better
• I find myself in my own world often and I want no one to talk to me

• I find myself wanting to shout leave me alone, I just need peace

• I feel that everyone wants a piece of me and I am pulled in too many directions, I want time alone. I want the Merry go round to stop, so I can get off

• My motivation is lacking and I find it hard to do things that I used to do easily. I always feel overstretched

• Yesterday I felt so mad and angry inside, everything made me angry – there being no baby milk at Morrison's so I chucked the cheese back and walked out!

• I am very forgetful at the moment too

• I am getting lots of headaches

• I can get short tempered and normally it is with JJ and it is generally when Miss M is screaming (at me – logically I know it is not but it always feels as if her screaming is a personal attack on me).

Now over to you, do you blog?  Have you had PND?  Yes, write a post and send people over to Mummy Boo's raffle.  No, then sign the petition and buy a raffle ticket or two if you are able to.
 
Thanks, God Bless, Mich x

Dear So and So: The #CyberMummy11 Edition

I met Kat at the weekend. You know the very clever Kat, who created the Dear So and So meme, well it has been a while since I have participated and seeing as I met her (she is very lovely) and I love her meme it is high time I joined in again, so here we go with the #CyberMummy11 edition ...

Dear CyberMummy Organisers,

I had a great day; the atmosphere was buzzing, Sarah Brown's keynote speech was heart-warming, the crowd sourced speakers were a real highlight of the day and it was superb to touch base with so many brands and to be able to represent my sponsor Vosene.  However I am, if I am honest (and you may know that is my way) a little disappointed with the content of the sessions.  I am afraid Lord Facebook had nothing really to say of interest, the writing workshop was strange to say the least and some of the other sessions just seemed basic. I expected to come home with a book full of tips that I would implement on my blog and I didn't -sorry.