What is your greatest parenting challenge?

Last Friday I met with some other mums and we sat around a table and mused about what challenge is the greatest facing us as parents today. There was probably only one surprise in there for me and it was really enlightening to hear one blogger talk about how heart wrenching she finds the divide between those 'who have' and 'those who don't'.  She showed us this image from the Guardian, depicting a family in Greece who are now living and begging on the streets. I have to say I had not given this much thought as a parenting issue (in general, yes) but she is right, I can remember at school knowing which kids lived in the council estate or those whose parents could not afford the trendy clothes and I am not casting any dispersions on those families but there were visible differences that even young kids can discern.

The other topics discussed were pretty much what I would term as the usual suspects.  I bought up the issue of technology and the impact it has on our children. Trying to limit the time spent on screen media is a job in itself, I know my JJ would happily sit at his PC for the day long and it always make me smile that when I tell him his time is up he thinks perhaps he can get his DS and play on that instead.  Err no, go jump on the trampoline boy!

Which leads me nicely into the next challenge; helping your children to live a healthy life and make wise choices with their food.  In this era of convenience foods and quick fixes it would be really easy for children to inadvertently learn that instant gratification is the name of the game where food is concerned. In opposition to this, another challenge is the worry that our children are growing up in a time where the media is portraying and promoting children to have an unhealthy body image. I have written before about my friends anorexic 10 year old.  Doesn't that make your heart ache? Do I ever want my children to believe that they need to be stick thing with an enormous bust? I think you know the answer to that.

At least three of the six of us at this market research session cited money as their biggest challenge.  I heard about large mortgages committed to whilst both parents are working, families taking big pay cuts to allow more family time and overall less stress and generally about how family life can change and cause massive money worries. Family can take on many different guises these days and this presents loads of unique situations. How do you provide what your child needs and pay all the bills without working yourself to death in 2012?

Many other issues were talked about but I won't give everything away, because what I would love to do is encourage you to share what is the big challenge that you face as a parent?  In this day and age there are so many pressures, which take you to boiling point?

It might be the same as one of those I have mentioned or it could be completely different.  There is no wrong answers, this is about you. The market research company that I met with today with love to hear from more parents about their challenges and for your time taken commenting, you will be entered into a draw to win a £25 voucher for Amazon.

So come on and tell me - 'what is the single biggest parenting challenge facing you today?' 

To enter - Just leave me a comment answering the above question and let me know the ages of your child/ children.

Giveaway Terms and Conditions

* The giveaway will close at 12 noon 6th July 2012
* The winner will be picked within 4 working days of the end time
* You need to respond within 7 days or I will choose another winner
* One valid comment will be picked at random
* I will organise a £25 Amazon gift voucher for the winner
* The prize is not transferable and there is no cash alternative



Disclaimer:  I attended a market research session and have been asked to blog on the subject of parenting challenges. I have not at all been instructed what to write.

Image(s): FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Reasons to be Cheerful 1,2,3 - Week 11 Link Up Today!

My reasons for being cheerful this week -

1. The meme I created last Friday is slowly working its way round the parenting blogging sphere (and maybe even further afield for all I know).  I am loving watching it move and discovering new blogs.  It puts a massive smile on my face to think that loads of people might be feeling affirmed and good about themselves.  Yay!
2. It looks as if Miss M's chickenpox are coming out, she did catch it off her sister.  Why, you may ask is this a good thing?  Well we have Peppa Pig World a week on Saturday, London Zoo the Saturday after and then we are off to Spring Harvest, so praise the Lord the contagious bit will be out the way before all the fun starts....
3. I know I had this reason last week, but it has to appear again! This is such a biggie for me.  You might have read my post about giving up compulsive overeating for Lent and I am pleased to report that at the moment God is holding me and helping me to refrain from compulsive eating (in the main, I'm am not perfect!).
4. I feel like I know what I am doing with my new job now.  I have really enjoyed this week and had something to get my teeth into.  Miss M having chickenpox will be a bit of a spanner in the works,  but I will get through it.

As I said before do not be constrained by 3 reasons, write as many or as few as you like.  Change the format for your posts if you fancy.  As long as you are happy/ cheerful/ grateful/ thankful then write your post and link up to spread a massive dose of positivity.






<center><a href="http://mdplife.blogspot.com/search/label/reasons%20to%20be%20cheerful"><img width="150" alt="Reasons to be Cheerful at Mummy From the Heart" src="http://i902.photobucket.com/albums/ac230/RebaMc/reasonstobecheerfulv2-1.jpg" height="150" /></a></center> There is the badge, if you want to add it to your post and don't forget to take the blog hop code from below the linky and paste this into your blog so that new readers can jump from blog...to blog... to blog and also promote your post and the link up by tweeting with the hashtag #Reasons2BCheerful

Remember to go and visit some others on the blog hop and leave them an encouraging comment and feel free to leave me a comment too, I love them as much as the next person and will always come back and say hi if you leave me a comment on my Reasons post.

..and before you go, I must remember to point you over to Maxabella's I'm Grateful for... link up.  Join up your reasons post there and make some new Aussie friends.

Of course Jen's Blog gems is still open too. Link up every other Sunday and air your archives.

Wishing you a fabulous week, Mich x

Reasons to be Cheerful 1,2,3 - Week 2. Join In Now!

Here we are again, it is that time of the week! How quick this first week has passed, I have been excited and nervous for this second week wondering if people will join in again. I do hope so. I class last weeks link up as a major success as 38 of you took the time to join in and I went and visited you all and cheered myself up immensely. I can not promise to visit you all every week, my visits this week led to two very late nights and two days of grumpy Mummy! whoops.

Onto my reasons - My reasons for being cheerful this week -

1. JJ, he is enough to make anyone happy.  He can drive you bonkers at times but on balance is divine. Here is a snippet from his prayers last night ' Dear God, Sorry that I keep TOOTing (talking out of turn - calling out basically) at school I do not mean to.......Thank you that I have the best teacher in the world....... Please help all the poor people to have money, all the hungry people to have food, all the thirsty people to have water and the people with no houses to have shelter.... Amen.  He certainly made me smile, proud and well up all in the space of 5 minutes.
2. You guys. I love my blog and more than that I love the people who come here and visit and support me.  Things seem to be going well at the moment and I am enjoying everything bloggy and twitter too.
3. I have been mainly abstinent this last week. If you are not sure what that means, read this post. It is always a minor miracle when I manage to go through a week without eating on my every emotion.  I weighed myself yesterday and was pleased to see I have dropped 10lb since after Christmas.  Still a long way to go but one day at a time.

Here is the lovely little button if you want to use it in your post of pop it on your side bar.  No pressure but it would certainly make me smile!




&<SPAN style="BACKGROUND: yellow" class=goog-spellcheck-word>lt</SPAN>;center>&<SPAN style="BACKGROUND: yellow" class=goog-spellcheck-word>lt</SPAN>;a <SPAN style="BACKGROUND: yellow" class=goog-spellcheck-word>href</SPAN>="http://<SPAN style="BACKGROUND: yellow" class=goog-spellcheck-word>mdplife</SPAN>.<SPAN style="BACKGROUND: yellow" class=goog-spellcheck-word>blogspot</SPAN>.com/search/label/reasons%20to%20be%20cheerful">&<SPAN style="BACKGROUND: yellow" class=goog-spellcheck-word>lt</SPAN>;<SPAN style="BACKGROUND: yellow" class=goog-spellcheck-word>img</SPAN> width="150" alt="Reasons to be Cheerful at Mummy with a Heart" <SPAN style="BACKGROUND: yellow" class=goog-spellcheck-word>src</SPAN>="http://i902.<SPAN style="BACKGROUND: yellow" class=goog-spellcheck-word>photobucket</SPAN>.com/albums/ac230/<SPAN style="BACKGROUND: yellow" class=goog-spellcheck-word>RebaMc</SPAN>/reasonstobecheerfulv2-1.<SPAN style="BACKGROUND: yellow" class=goog-spellcheck-word>jpg</SPAN>" height="150" />&<SPAN style="BACKGROUND: yellow" class=goog-spellcheck-word>lt</SPAN>;/a>&<SPAN style="BACKGROUND: yellow" class=goog-spellcheck-word>lt</SPAN>;/center> 
and remember that if you tweet your post or promote others to use the hashtag #Reasons2BCheerful on Twitter.  Then we can all keep up with each other!

So over to you.....  Here is the linky.....  Thanks for joining in,  Mich x

(Don't forget this is a blog hop, so you can easily get the code and paste it into the end of your Reasons post and then your friends and followers can join in without having to come back here.  Some of you did this last week and it seemed to work very well, but again no pressure).

It's a New Year

Stating the obvious! Can you tell I did not know what to call this entry? lol

All is pretty well for us, I have enjoyed Christmas and New Year, there has been nothing massive going on but the company of my family, dh, kids, lots of sale shopping, some relaxing, playing with the kids etc has all added up to a happy Mich.

Dh was working last night, so I spent the evening with my Mum, Dad and Brother (32) and actually had an enjoyable and sober NYE. We watched some trashy best song of the noughties program and then Mammia Mia and I sang my heart out.

Today has featured more sale shopping and it has been a successful year, I have loads of new bits, most of which were bought by my parents. I am a lucky girl! I was thrilled to be buying things in a size 20 rather than 22 as well.

I think I have put some weight on over Xmas but I am not too worried. I had a couple of abstinent days over the holidays and on others I enjoyed some treats but I can not remember binging or completely over indulging on any day.

Today, so far I have been abstinent and I am very grateful for that. My Dad got a big tin of shortbread out of the cupboard this morning and they have been calling me ever since, I pray I can resist them tonight. I adore them but I really do not want to eat them as this abstinence is hard earned and means so much more than a 2 minute fix.

I go home tomorrow so I can avoid more of the foods that are not good for my recovery. I think I will get dh to help me clear out anything left at home that should not be there. I will do my usual trick and take it to work to fatten everyone else up!

The fantasty was better than the reality! lol

I have had 3 good days of abstinence and today would of been the fourth but I gave into the calling of some gorgeous looking cadbury thick chocolate biscuits. I had four of them instead of the yoghurt I had planned for after my tea and guess what they were not that great. In my mind they were going to be amazing and taste so fab but really they were gone in a moment and not that satisfying at all. Oh well, lesson learnt hopefully.

I am not going to beat myself up as I lost my abstinence today. At 8.30pm I was over it and starting my abstinence again. It is Christmas and there is so much good stuff out there and if I can resist at least some things I will be doing far better than any other Christmas ever before!

A good couple of days

Who knows that has changed. I think all that effort I made to get to my much needed ED meeting on Thursday night in the snow is paying dividends. This is day 2 abstinent - no chocolate, sweets, biscuits, cakes or ice cream. Thank you Lord. There has been so many times in the last couple of days when I have been offered things or had things available that I wanted to eat but I just had to think of how wonderful it feels to be abstinent, it means such a lot to me. Far more than a 5 minute fix of chocolate does. I feel slimmer and more in control.

It was hard at my Mother in Laws (MIL) today as she has so much yummy stuff there and she always cooks far in excess of what is needed, but I ate a moderate meal and stayed to my food plan, avoiding all my no-go foods.

My period has arrived today and I am finding that when I eat better I have less pain, which is great. It has been a tough day today in general, so again it is even more excellent that by Gods grace I have stayed abstinent. Our shower pump appears to have broken, I have lost one of my lovely pandora style bracelets, I can not get the video camera footage to make a movie and get onto CD (this is my third attempt in just over a year, having spent about 30 hours doing this!!!!! grrr) and these are all things that would normally seem unmanageable and drive me to food - but not today!

For today, I am sane and wish to get well and to stop eating compulsively. Thank you Lord.

Totally Insane!

It is official, I am nuts!

I was at work yesterday and I noticed that people had been bringing lots of yummy foods into the office - cakes, chocolate biscuits, sweets etc and boy did I fancy some. I managed to resist until lunchtime and then packed myself off to aqua to get out the office and not to think about food.

Well on the way over there I remembered that they sell the most lovely chocolate chip shortbread and I started thinking about how I could swap my foods around for the day. The plan was shreddies, tea cake for breakfast. Chicken roll, crisps and satsuma for lunch. Jacket with tuna and salad for tea, then a granola bar. So I decided that I could have have the shortbread as part of my lunch, dump the granola bar and have the satsuma after dinner.

I obviously knew this was the wrong choice as I struggled the whole way through the aqua, asking God to stop me buying it but desperately wanting it and to taste how nice it was. I could even hear my food sponsor in my head telling me I had gone into treat mode because I had done aqua and that what was important was sticking to my food plan and getting through the day without the focus on food. Not deciding that swapping them would be OK as mainly the calories would still be the same but that I would still be 301. Too much thinking can drive you nuts....

So I spent an hour in the pool completely obsessing about food. Insane!

I then went back to work and ate my lunch, chicken roll, crisp and shortbread and yes I enjoyed it and stayed away from other food for the afternoon. Upon getting home at just after 5pm I just did not try really and stuck a penguin bar in my mouth, then when I got back from JJ's concert I had my tea, minus the salad and ate some chocolate after too.

I spent the drive to bible study obsessing about what I could buy to eat to take with me for us all. I managed to avoid the shops and got there with nothing, to find chocolate flapjack on the table (along with satsumas for me -they do try to help me! bless) but of course I went for some flapjack and then a satsuma for good measure.

As always I pondered not telling my food sponsor about how weak I am at times, but that defeats the object and I only lie to myself. So here I am confessing all and repenting and praying that I will be able to manage to be abstinent from now.

I hate this disease, I do not want to be controlled by food anymore and I hate being so weak to it.

Looking forward to eating moderately every day

each day I read from a book called 'For today' and the reading I had today really stirred something in me. It talked about my past life being filled with diets and that these generally had a life span, ie: you would diet for Christmas, an occasion or a holiday and when that date came you would over indulgence and the downward spiral would start again.

It mentioned the change in my thinking which makes it a pleasure to use the power of my program to eat moderately on days when excess is the norm. That is very comforting to me, I think about Christmas and wonder how I will survive this Christmas without binging. The answer is I will not buy many of the old foods that we once enjoyed and for those visiting my house I am sure they love me enough to understand that it is more important for me to appear inhospitable and not offer them excessive food and to remain abstinent.

So today I am reminded that what I was first told when I entered ED is true, that even the worst abstinent day is better than any day where I was eating to excess.

Quick Hi

My Mum came up to see us on Wednesday and has been here since, hence the lack of posting. It is so nice to have her here. Dad is up tomorrow to collect her so that will be nice to see them both.

I just wanted to do a quick update to say that things are going pretty well here. I am trying to spend time with God each day, making sure I am reading my ED literature, praying and going to meetings. This is my 10th day of abstinence - isn't that wonderful! Thanks so much God. It is really amazing, when I stopped trying and started to purely rely on God that is when it all clicked and I am able to just eat moderately at the moment. My abstinence is no chocolate, cakes, biscuits, sweets or ice cream but I am allowing myself plenty of foods that would not normally feature on a diet, such as custard, chips, take aways etc. As long as they are planned as my meal and I only eat a moderate portion I am happy and staying within plan and doing what needs to be done to look after myself.

I weighed on Thursday morning and I was 15st 5lb, so that is another couple of pounds lost. In total I have now shed 38lbs from my heaviest weight when not pregnant. This was in December 2005. I am motivated to keep going but have to keep reminding myself this is a forever lifestyle change and not a quick fix solution and things will take a good while.

My ED meeting on Thursday was good. It was about step 4, which is where we write our fearless and searching moral inventory, so quite a scary step but I do not mind. When the time is right, I look forward to getting everything down on paper and freeing myself from some of my baggage (stuff that I do not even realise affects me).

Right off to have some blood taken now for testing for diabetes...

Yay, celebrate!

I think the chair I listened to last night at my meeting has got through to me. She was saying that you get out of this program what you put in and that we should not over complicate things. Just abstain one day at a time and it will all fall into place by the grace of God.

Well, I am celebrating my first 24 hours of proper 301 abstinence.

Today I have had - porridge and banana for breakfast. Vege soup and 3 ryvita with cheese for lunch, tea was homemade potato and onion flan with salad and after some yoghurt with prunes. I have actually really enjoyed my food today and not felt hungry at all.

Of course I have thought about food many times, I am a food addict after all but I am pleased to say that with God by my side I have been able to not pick it up.

Now for the challenge I have a friend coming over to watch a girlie DVD now and I must keep away form the food whilst she is here! I will report tomorrow. I will now go and say a quick prayer.