Monday 17 October 2011

Sadly So Many Of Us Have Miscarried, Let's Call For Better Care...


Mumsnet have started a campaign for better miscarriage care and this is a fabulous thing and I am totally behind them.  Sadly I am a bit late and should have been joining in with this last week but let's be honest, it does not matter what week I post as long as I post and ask you all to try and do your bit to help as well.

Statistics say that 1 in 3 women will miscarry at some point, I am one of them. Last year I miscarried my fourth child. Samuel Noah he was to be called and he would have been one this November but instead of crawling round my feet he is safe with Jesus and even though I am comforted by that thought it does not take away the angst and longing for my missing baby. A devastation and pain caused by a miscarriage should never be underestimated.

Before I had children I always prayed that I would not have to suffer a miscarriage, I just knew this would be such a terrible thing to experience.  I remember saying 'Please Lord, it is one thing to not get pregnant but quite another to miscarry'.  It may seem strange to say but I am glad that if I had to suffer a miscarriage it was after I had my children.  Of course having other children does not make it OK but for me it certainly made it more bearable, I had to focus on my family and keep going and that really helped my healing.

When I read some posts around miscarriage I know that I was lucky in the care I received.  Yes I waited 3 hours for my scan, the one that confirmed my babe had died inside me 4 weeks before but all the people I came into contact with at the hospital were friendly and professional.  The sonographer was lovely, she spoke sympathetically to me and the doctor I saw afterwards explained everything thoroughly and sent me away with my choice to make. When I came back in to be checked after the actual miscarriage took place they saw me immediately and kept me separate to the still pregnant mothers.  I was offered a post-mortem and a funeral for my babe.  My hospital did good for me and for that I am very thankful.

Many women do not receive any kind of acceptable level of care when they miscarry, they are pushed aside and sometimes denied access to scans and appointments.  From what I saw when I gave birth to my children maternity care is not highly regarded and wards are short-staffed and those there are overworked, this does not make for a satisfactory birth experience.  This is why Mumsnet have started their campaign.

You do not need to be a blogger to support this campaign, you just need to believe that good care is important for any woman that is going through the awful experience of miscarriage.

If you want to read my story of miscarriage then take a look here, I blogged a lot about my miscarriage and how I dealt with my grief, I feel it is very important to show other women that miscarriage happens to so many of us and it is nothing to be ashamed of.

If this sensitive topic is affecting you or those you know right now then my prayers are with you.