I have to be honest from the start and say it does not bother me what you wear, if you are an adult then you can make your own decisions and if you want to get all your flesh on show then go for it - enjoy! I'm not writing this post to make anyone feel bad, I was just generally musing how difficult I find it to dress in the hot weather.
For me, I have body hang-ups, lots of them and I know I'm not supposed to. I'm either supposed to get tough on myself, do something about this blob I have become or I should embrace my figure and love myself. I do battle in this area constantly, especially as a Christian. I have real guilt trips over being a fatty and I pray that I will be able to hand this issue over to the Lord and do the footwork so that I can be free of this bondage. For me weight is a massive battle, as You'll know if you have followed this blog for any length of time.
The bible tells me that God loves me just the way I am and that He knows everything about me but that does not stop me getting all confused and feeling like I have let Him down by allowing myself to become so overweight. It is good to remind myself what God said in His Word -
I am familiar with all your ways. (Psalm 139:3)
For you were made in my image. (Genesis 1:27)
I knew you even before you were conceived. (Jeremiah 1:4-5)
I chose you when I planned creation. (Ephesians 1:11-12)
You were not a mistake, for all your days are written in my book. (Psalm 139:15-16)
You are fearfully and wonderfully made. (Psalm 139:14)
For I am your provider and I meet all your needs. (Matthew 6:31-33)
My plan for your future has always been filled with hope. (Jeremiah 29:11)
Because I love you with an everlasting love. (Jeremiah 31:3)
I will never stop doing good to you. (Jeremiah 32:40)
For you are my treasured possession. (Exodus 19:5)
And nothing will ever separate you from my love again. (Romans 8:38-39)
I can't fail to be overjoyed when I read that and it helps me to gain perspective and know that yes I'm sinning, I'm guilty of gluttony but I do want to repent and turn away from my old ways.
For now though, I need to acknowledge that I have a size 22 body to dress and get on with finding some suitable attire for these hot months. Last summer the closest I got to summer clothes was 3/4 length trousers and a long dress. This year my lifestyle will be different over the summer and it will be hard to play ball with the kids wearing my jeans, so I've done a bit of shopping the last couple of days. Charity shops and sales are great news.
Here is what I am wearing today, this is the first time I have worn a skirt of this length for about 5 years and I am embracing it and saying I look OK. I know I look fat in it, there is no denying that but what business is that of anyone else's? It is not offensive, I don't have a mass of unnecessary flesh on show and it is really cool. Also at £12.50 it was a great bargain.
I even bought some shorts yesterday and that totally amazed me. The last time I wore shorts was 2004 and that was only ever abroad when it got silly hot, but this year I'll be by the lake and out playing with the kids a lot and it is so important that my children grow up with a healthy body attitude and a Mum who has a sense of fun. I know the best thing for them would be if I was slimmer, healthier and could provide a better example but I am where I am right now and I must acknowledge that and thus when they grab me for a hug and I feel self-conscious I do not show it, I hug them tighter.
Here are my top tips for summer dressing as a larger lady -
- Buy the right size clothes, don't try and kid yourself you are an 18 if you are a 20. Lumps and bumps and panty lines look far worse than a well fitted piece of clothing and really who will look at the label?
- Hold your head up high and smile. Confidence goes a massive long way. I often have people say to me that they did not realise I am as large as I am as I carry it well. That will be my confident outer persona they see.
- Wear what you want to wear, don't be put off by what you think others feel you should be wearing. I have lily white legs and they are on show this year, sorry if that offends you!
- Use talcum powder if you suffer with chaffing, it is a fact of life is you are an avid exerciser or are overweight. A good shower and then some vaseline will clear it up overnight.
- Get yourself a really good bra, when your boobs are lifted as they should be this instantly slims you down.
- Make the most of the areas of your body that you like with accessories - pretty necklaces, red lips, big hair, strappy sandals - whatever it is that makes you smile, do it!
- Go for shapes/ cuts of clothes that accentuate the areas you want them to. For an hour glass figure nip in that waist with a belt, for pear shape use ruffles or such up top to balance yourself out and for apple, keep the skirts long to give you length.
- Avoid metallic or shiny fabrics, I always find that these make me look bigger but hey if you love the item then go for it. Or just buy some cute pumps or a handbag to look fashionable.
- Don't be afraid to use colour, it is so temping as a large person to just wear black or navy but splashes of colour make a huge difference and again send out a confident message.
- Go for styles which are current. I am not saying look for high-end fashion but try not to be dowdy and outdated. Straight away nasty old sack dresses send the message that you are fat and stuck in a rut!
Have you got any good tips to share with me? Come on ladies lets accept what we have and get on with life.....
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